Obviously this depends on your personal situation- However I'm just curious. For me, I'm worried how it would potentially impact my professional life. Most of the people I work with are TBMs and I just don't want to deal with that type of fallout. One day I will make it official!

I haven't because I don't care.

It sucks that you're in that position. Unfortunately, 'bad news' spreads like wildfire in Mormondom.

DH and I did. They came knocking on our door today (unannounced).
They were met with a sign on the door that said:

ARE YOU FROM CHURCH?
DON'T KNOCK
DON'T RING BELL
DON'T WINDOW PEEP
AND DON'T CALL US
YES, THIS MEANS YOU.

I was amazed they followed instructions. They sat in their car out on the street for about 10 min. Doing what, I can only speculate.

Praying, fuming, calling the Bishop for instructions?

Nice sign.

Obvious answer: the mormon cult.

I'd hate having them sit in front of my house. I live on a little private street and pay good money for upkeep. I don't want my view and my street marred or contaminated with mormons who are in violation of my restraining order.

Trying to get this idea through to them is like talking to fence posts.

We have not resigned officially. I've written a few resignation letters and there is one in an envelope in case of emergency, but to be honest I just don't really care anymore, nor do I recognize them as someone I need to get permission from in order to leave. After all, they do not recognize the authority of those churches my ancestors left to join the mormons, so why should we ask their permission to go elsewhere? The simple fact is that we no longer claim them as our church and we do not interact with them in any way.

They have honored our wishes and left us alone. However, if they do go on the attack it only takes a second to drop that letter in the box. Besides, resigning only moves your name from one file to another which can be reviewed any time they like.

Wife and I did to stop the unannounced visits amongst other personal violations. Too, We did not want to be affiliated with such a racist, homophobic, misogynistic, avaricious and pretentious organization.

I have not resigned officially yet - mostly because of my mother. Not sure I'll 'get around to it' or not - I really don't care all that much.

DH and I told our home teacher very politely after a long visit that he would no longer be welcome in our home. HT replied he had the "authority" to visit our home any time he wanted unless we resigned. We did.

Every home owner has a right to ban anyone from their property for any reason.

By this creep's logic, we'd have to allow child molesters and burglers on out property if they happened to attend a church that considered us as members. That is stupid!!

Mormon doctrine: "We believe in being subject to kings, presidents, rulers, and magistrates, in obeying, honoring, and sustaining the law."

Law: "§ 30.05. CRIMINAL TRESPASS. (a) A person commits an
offense if he enters or remains on or in property, including an
aircraft or other vehicle, of another without effective consent or he enters or remains in a building of another without effective consent and he:
(1) had notice that the entry was forbidden; or
(2) received notice to depart but failed to do so."

Love it!

I won't.

1) I don't care all that much. Why does it matter if I've "officially" resigned or not?

2) My parents are still way in - and it would be harsh for them to remove myself from the membership.

There were two reasons why I officially resigned.

1) Because I couldn't bear to have my name associated with an organization which actively works against the civil rights of others. I was suddenly embarrassed to be a Mormon, even if I was an inactive one.

2) I wanted to feel that I could say or do whatever I wanted to, without there being the possibility that they could ex me. Not that it really would have mattered, but it just let me feel that I left on my own terms, rather than on theirs. I guess it's the old, "You can't fire me. I quit!"

Greyfort Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> 1) Because I couldn't bear to have my name
> associated with an organization which actively
> works against the civil rights of others. I was
> suddenly embarrassed to be a Mormon, even if I was
> an inactive one.

Same reason as me. I don't want to have any affiliation with them.

To be honest, it just felt good! To tell the chain of command that I didn't believe and I wanted out was like dropping a bag of bricks I'd been carrying around. Even if it doesn't matter to them, I got to confess how I really felt, and that felt amazing!

I haven't stepped inside a ward house in 5 years. I haven't believed for 33 years. I haven't had a HT (or any other Church rep) drop by for over 2 years.

Why fix what isn't broken?

My dad asked me not to, in case I change my mind. Not going to happen, but in my case, no harm, no foul. My husband and I are in the process of joining another church anyways. We're lucky that the local ward is hands off.

I did it because I haven't believed for years, and because my grandmother changed the will (that grandpa RIP had drawn up) so that her (paid for) house will go immediately to Deseret Trust instead of allowing me (with disability) and my adult children to live there as long as taxes and utilities were paid when she dies. She decided we couldn't afford it, even after going over and over the budget with her. Her former bishop is also her attorney.

I can't forgive, so I'm trying to forget. I resigned from the church on 01.21.11 by email and didn't have any problems. Three weeks and I was out. I have since moved to Nevada and have not had anybody of any religion show up at my door. Strong Catholic area, but they dont go around being pushy, and the LDS temple here is about the size of a walk-in closet. It's nice not to see an LDS church on every corner, although I could still recognize the two that I've seen.

Possibly pagan--how can you keep from hiring a hit-man for that former bishop/attorney!

You must have a lot of mind control, if you think you can forget this horrible injustice. Mormonism has got to implode on itself someday.

You have your children, and that is everything. I hope they aren't trapped in the cult. You were wise to move away and get a fresh start.

You have my sympathy and my best wishes for the future.

About resigning: I and my children resigned together, because of Mormon abuse, and the reasons Greyfort wrote.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 12/12/2011 03:12AM by forestpal.

Though we don't want to be associated with the church in any way, and completely loathe EVERYTHING about the church--the brainwashing, the culture, the self-righteousness, the homophobia, the bigotry, the judging,the trite stories, the empty promises, and all the rest, we have not formally resigned because of our parents. We try to respect the fact that church means everything to them, and that they'd be devastated to know we've shunned it.

And DH also works with way too many TBMs, so similar concerns to yours, toolong.

+1 to Greyfort and seamaiden - those are the exact reasons I resigned, and I couldn't be happier!

I posted somewhere here that I was not resigning in case of apocolypse (zombie or other). Mormons tend to hoard food and guns and that might come in handy. My daughter said that she would much rather be EATEN BY ZOMBIES!

...I found it intellectually and morally intolerable to be officially affiliated with what I came to be viewed as a complete fraud. And I had been way too active (Bishoprics, Stake High Councils) to simply become inactive. Additionally, I wished to depart on my own terms, rather than someday be excommunicated by some yahoo Bishop.

Of course, being an attorney, I certainly did have to consider the effect on my profession and income. Not being in a Mormon-dominated area made the decision not too difficult. Had I still been living in Utah, I don't know that I could have summoned the courage to make such a break. I suspect I would have tried to keep my mouth shut, and my thoughts to myself. I actually did try that for awhile, but eventually the dissonance between my external Mormonism and my internal apostasy became too great. And yes, telling my parents was especially difficult.

But once I made the decision, made the announcements, and completed the resignation process, I felt I was once again a whole person, indescribably free. My wife and I became members of a liberal, progressive, mainstream Protestant church (United Methodist), and we have not missed the stultifying atmosphere of Mormonism one bit. Believe me, anyone who says that all religions (or all churches) are the same, doesn't have the slightest idea what they're talking about.

We're still in as a family just because DW doesn't want to create any more undue heartache on her mother. It doesn't have any effect on us as the church does leave us alone.

Possible unrest ahead though. Got a text from a great friend (TBM) that said a new bishop was called today. If he decides to push the issue, it could get interesting. Not sure that he will though, (friend has told the church on several occasions not to mess with us) as I do have business dealings with him on occasions.

My parents.

-I have been out for several years, and they accept that and accept me and my family regardless of where we spend our sundays.
-out of respect for them (Cardston Temple workers, 78 and 81 years old respectively), I won't resign until they are gone. It would be an insult that I dont' need to deliver. I love them too much to let the church, or my resignation, stand in the way of our relationship.
-Daughter turned 8 last week; she will not be getting baptized
-4/6 kids in the family are completely out of the church
-multiple generational memebers; one part of the family goes back to Hyrum Smith

Several things about the church had been making me feel spiritually queasy for a while, but until I found RfM, I didn't realize that other people - articulate and intelligent ones - had many of the same doubts and feelings that I did.

After learning so much more of the truth rather than the canned BS they feed you, there was no way I could stay there.

I doubt I'll take the time to resign.
The morg don't recognize my authority and I don't recognize theirs.
I've learned that they don't truly remove people from the records.
If I were to resign they wouldn't recognize my authority to make that decision for myself.
I certainly don't recognize their authority in any aspect of my life, whether in the present, or the afterlife.
So for me, the issue cancels itself out.
The mishies go around anyway, and seem to unavoidably insinuate themselves into neighborhoods.
Thankfully I'm in an area now that has a really low morg population.
Makes a difference.

I couldn't be bothered.

It doesnt impact me in any way. I can't recall the last time I had the 'knock at the door'. I am in a big enough area - with such a small morg population - that it doesnt come up.

the local ward knows not to contact me, and I am cynical enough that they wouldn't pull any of that 'priesthood authority' crap on me.

I don't respect their power enough to draft a resignation letter....

if I feel the need to do so, some time in the future, then I will take care of it then..... and you can only resign once.

Exactly. Same as EssexExMo, I don't respect their power enough to draft a resignation letter. I also live where they are barely a blip on the screen. We get a knock on the door about twice a year and don't answer. They did leave some Panera Bread a couple of days ago, along with a printed invitation to the ward Christmas party -- many miles away. If it got to be a constant, nagging annoyance, I would formally resign. Now it is an amusement... something that the kids, husband and I joke about whenever there's an unexpected knock at our door.

... which don't include abiding by the cult's rules.

There never was a contract between us.

F**k 'em.

Timothy

not because I wanted them to cease contact--because I knew they wouldn't. My TBM daughter had a bit of a meltdown last Christmas about me not forgiving the LDS church when I had forgiven her father . . .

I felt the need to make a statement to her and a few friends who kept saying I still believed deep down.

I didn't want to jump through what I consider THEIR hoops.

The still make contact--mostly the young adults trying to contact my son. That is beyond a JOKE. I post their little notes on the refrigerator for us all to get a good laugh.

I can't very well suggest other people officially resign if I haven't myself.

For years my membership was with my inactive parents address in another city. One day a man called and introduced himself as my home teacher. My mother simply said, "He doesn't live here." She gave no further information.

Less than 30 days later I came home to a plate of cookies on the doorstep and a note from the home teachers. I ignored them for a few months, but they were relentless. This was about the time Prop 8 was heating up and it was all too much for me so I resigned. No more stalking, no more doorstep treats and no more association with a bigoted cult.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 12/12/2011 09:26AM by birchtree.

I haven't resigned because of the havoc it would cause to my TBM DH.

After decades of "inactivity" I decided to write the official resignation letter...........Happy Birthday.

I didn't want to answer the question "are you a Mormon"? with any answer other than "NO".

I have been concerned that my DD would find out but he is miles away...........and so far I guess not.

At the time I resigned we were attending a local Christian church which DD seemed OK with as long as it wasn't a Catholic church....hmmmmmmmmm

Now church isn't part of my life...........

K

It seemed like there were suits at my door every other week. Lots and lots of calls. Sometimes the callers were using some sort of anonymous block to fool the caller id. Then when I'd answer -- Surprise! It's the Mormons. Lots of hangups too. The visits were always unannounced. My ex-wife used to throw them off our property, but then different Mormons would show up who claimed not to know anything about our "situation." The neighbors said that people would drive by our house slowly sometimes, pause and talk to each other and then pull away. One time our neighbor called out to some suits at our door when we weren't home and said "Why don't you leave them alone! They don't go to your church anymore. When are you going to get a clue?" There was some other creepy behavior too, like the guy who kept craning his neck to see inside our home.

Our house was egged on three different occasions. The last time was in our new home after we moved, so I started documenting and consulting with the police. Here is a photo of the damage the third time. It was on the back of my house, which was only accessible down a steep embankment with some difficulty -- especially while carrying eggs, I would imagine.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/28187307@N05/2631206634/in/photostream

This was in Maple Grove, Minnesota.

Oh, here's a story. One time, my wife and I were having dinner at Champps Americana. While we were waiting in the lobby to be seated, a well-known middle aged couple from the ward came up to us. The woman was chatting my wife nervously, and her husband shook my hand and gave me a very hostile look. While we were eating, the woman came to our table and made a scene. She was crying and saying "I AM SO SORRY! I AM SO SORRY!" People were turned around watching, and I asked the server to quickly get our check.

So, I wrote the letter. It took some effort to get it pushed through. First the bishop refused to process it, because I sent it to him as an email. Then the stake president sat on it. Then Kathy Worthington called Greg Dodge's office in our behalf and lit a fire under them. I made several other calls. The night our resignation was processed by Mr. Dodge and I had verbal confirmation, we got two strange calls from people in the ward. Both calls were word for word and sounded somewhat robotic, inviting us to some stake activity. The first call asked for me. A minute later a second call asked for my wife. We avoided any contact with Mormons from then on until we moved to another state.

I've never known a more neurotic group of people than the Mormons in that place. Just unbelievable.



Edited 2 time(s). Last edit at 12/12/2011 10:10AM by Makurosu.

just wow.

I was a member of the Methodist church long before I became a Mormon. When my wife and I became inactive in TSCC we started attending the Methodist church. Fifteen years later the Stake President contacts me. We talk. He says he's content to let things remain as they are. A few days later I get a letter from him telling me (interestingly, he didn't mention DW) that I either repent and come back to church, resign,or face disciplinary proceedings. I composed a letter (with help from resources on this board) and DW joined me in resigning for good measure. Surprisingly, even my TBM relatives are critical of the SP.

just in case I unexpectedly buy the farm and some well-intentioned TBM family members dress me up in the goofy and cultish temple clothes for my friends to see. Gotta go out with more dignity than that.

The main reason I made it official is my health. Don't dress me up in that F**king costume, and NO CHURCH FUNERAL!!

I've made arrangements with my bro and sis, and have written instructions.

The reasons I quit attending in the first place was for self ownership.

I just couldn't fit in the mold.

I had started the process but my wife said she would divorce me if I went through with it.

Although I would love to resign 'officially' - not because I respect TSCC's authority but simply because I don't want to be counted among their numbers - I have refrained from doing so because my TBM husband would divorce me if I did and fight for full custody of the kids, yada yada yada.

a declaration of independence. But my parents had long since passed on. If they had still been around I might have been a lot more circumspective.

Once I determined for myself that TSCC was 100% sham, I just walked away.

stalking wherever I moved. Very creepy. Finally I had to resign to stop it. Well worth it. Thank you Bro. Woodruff as my HT to give me the kick in the pants.

Your rudeness and lack of boundaries got me off the stalking list. I should kiss you on both cheeks for improving my life.

I official resigned my membership in 2002. It was time to leave the LDS Church as I was no longer a believer in their claims.
It was a choice I made when I knew my believing husband accepted my decision. I wanted to put a period and move on.

I've been totally inactive for nearly 20 years and can count on one hand the amount of contact I've had from the church. They don't bother me, and for the sake of my parent's feelings, do not feel the need to resign at this time. After they die I'll reconsider.

Since I know his reason, I'll share my brothers - He lives in the Morridor and wants to retain his "right" to enter ward building should be need to pee or whatever. LOL Seriously.