After so many sunday dinners, I am just about fed up with the blessing of the food. The whole family is Mo, except for me and my hubby, who was raised Lutheran, not Mormon. Every time we have a blessing on the food, they call on all the other "patriarchs" of the family, but never my husband, since he's not Mo. He is the best damn bil any of my sisters have. He has built all of the nieces cedar chests, just bought new tires for one of their mini vans (since they could not afford with their 4 kids) and built a bathroom in another sister's house so they could sell and move to a better part of the city. Plus he put a sprinkler system into my parents home, and recently fixed an electical problem so their furnace would work. They have no problem bringing their boy scout troops down the firestation where he works for tours....but he can't say a blessing of the food because he doesn't hold the priesthood.

It chaps my hide that after everything he has done for my family, they can't respect him enough to say a blessing. The man even knows The Lords Prayer in German! I think I'm going to speak up at the next dinner. I've had enough.

He was less valiant in the pre-existence, This is his lot.

Do not question the Wholly Ghost. He chooses who says the prayer.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 12/23/2011 12:35AM by untarded.

It seems to me that would be the best opportunity. As host, he could take charge. Even if one of your family members suggested someone else, he could say, "Thanks, I've got it."

Because his lips would draw near to Elohim. But his heart would be far from him.

Has your husband's church ever built a multi-billion dollar mall?

No?

See. What does your husband's heart know of god?

We quit going to baptisms/blessings because I felt it was a complete slight to him to have the rest of the bils doing the blessing and him just having to sit with us, less important womenfolk. I'm just fed up that there has to be this void because of a stupid, made-up church. It's affecting me more this holiday season than it has in the past. I'll admit I'm pretty bitter. I feel like my familys been hijacked by fiction.

News Flash!

It has.

SerenitySeeker Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> We quit going to baptisms/blessings because I felt
> it was a complete slight to him to have the rest
> of the bils doing the blessing and him just having
> to sit with us, less important womenfolk.

Are they really slighting him, or all the women present?

"Every time we have a blessing on the food, they call on all the other "patriarchs" of the family, but never my husband, since he's not Mo.

Interesting that even the lowly woman is unable to speak to God, despite wearing the Garment of the Holy Priesthood.

We assume that the food is nourishing and strengthening!

Mormons will be Mormons!

Of course, they happily accept all the good things that your husband does for them--they are blessings from Heavenly Father and probably "fodder" for Fast and Testimony meeting.

It is for the host or hostess to decide who is to offer the "blessing" of the food. As a guest in another's home it is not your place to object or take offense in who is choosen and who is not.

Mormons, even and especially family ones, are just so hung up on being and being perceived Mormon that they seldom seem to think to include other family members in 'religious' rites if they are not also Mormon. That is how Mormons are!

I am sure that if you were to bring up the subject to them, they would be shocked that YOU felt offended as THEY never meant it that way. Mutual courtesy is not generally a Mormon thing, EXCEPT TO OTHER MORMONS.

Your husband sounds like a fine man to me, and I am sure that you love him and wish to "protect" him from feeling unappreciated in your family.

In your place, I would feel like my family was being oblivious to my feelings as well as my husband's.

In your home, you and your husband as host and hostess will have the decission to handle the "blessing" and who gives it.

Enjoy your family gatherings now, because as this "older" woman can tell you, as time passes so do our loved ones and the gatherings grow smaller and further apart until...they cease.

One question:

Would you feel better if your husband stopped being so nice to your family?

........(in anticipating your answer) I thought not!



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 12/23/2011 08:53AM by rowan.

"Fiction hijacked my family"--------BRILLIANT!!!!!

I was just going to comment on that statement! That's amazing and so "true."

If you're the visitor in a Mormon home, then you can only expect the behavior you've already experienced. There's no excusing it, but you can expect it.

If you're in your own home, take charge.

Exactly....it is NOT the job of other guests in your home to decide when the meal starts by the blessing of the food...It is YOUR job (as host/hostess in your house) to do this.

Better yet...YOU should say grace/bless the food then sit down and start eating. If someone else (with the PH) wants to do this, thell them politely and firmy that you just did so...let's eat.

I can see why others would appreciate the prayer opportunity though. Have you dropped hints?

"DH is also good at giving prayers and enjoys it so much when he has the opportunity . . . ."

but maybe the Mormon's don't think he would feel comfortable blessing the food, or would be embarrassed to do it, so they are trying to avoid embarrassment for him.

You should volunteer him, or he should offer to do it. He could say something like, "I think it's my turn". He shouldn't let the Mormon's be in charge for every blessing.

make sure your husband wants to do it before kicking up a fuss about it. He might could care less. If he wants to then fuss away.

How about having to go through an asshole brother in-law who spoke insulting blasphemous words against my dead father the day of his funeral, then was asked to give the family prayer just before we all attended the funeral service. My older brother who wasn't there to see the hell he caused just minutes prior, was the one who appointed himself to be in charge to ask our brother in-law to say the prayer. I told my brother about what happened a couple months later, and he was pissed off. He told me if he had known that before hand, he wouldn't have asked him to say the prayer, but he probably would have asked me to instead. It was a direct slap in the face to my deceased father, my family and I. I was very hesitant to stand in a circle and hold hands for the family prayer for a Damn reason! I felt very uncomfortable with a bigot addressing a prayer in honor of my fathers life whom he just insulted! Fucker!