I know I am going to burst out laughing at least once. I need to be respectful I know. I can't stop goin to Church until my divorce is over with.

My best to you!

Wow. Good luck to ya. Once I knew the truth, I never went back, so I can't imagine trying to sit through it, knowing it's all a crock. I'd keep rolling my eyes. I don't hide what I'm thinking very well, or so I've been told.

You are lucky you have a place to vent, with positive, understanding feedback. Almost always open, day or night.

Here's an idea. Make a game of it. Don't wear the garments when you go. If you want to make it look you are, then wear a plane white t-shirt instead.

In Sunday School class, ask questions in a way that they will not be interpritted as anti-Mormon, but something a regular member might be wondering, and that you know is going to get a BS response. Or do what I do around my TBM family, and critisize the prophet Mohamed (or some other cult leader) for doing things that Joseph Smith also did, and watching the outrage (I call it time bombing, because some of them will eventually find out Joseph Smith did it too and will remember why they knew it was outrages. Example 14 year old brides.) You might have to do a little research, but the similarities between Joe Smith and every other Huckster who has come along is amazing.

I stopped wearing the garments this past summer. I could not keep on wearing them. It has always been my biggest pet peeve. I would have periods when I wore them faithfully for a year or two and not wear them for a few months because theu drove me crazy. I disliked the layers that I had to wear to cover them properly. No way!

Good for you. Then simply try the subversive game.

I hope it doesn't come to that. It seems like a lot happening all at once.

From what I understand she has been trapped in a miserable marriage for a long time, and duty to the MORG was what has been making her feel like she had to stick it out.

Angilina, I have said it before, I will say it again. There is no reason why someone needs to stay in an unhappy marriage. None. Everyone, wife, husband, and children are almost always better off in two happy seperate homes then one single miserable home. It doesn't even mean you or your husband are bad people. I get along with my ex wife a lot better after our divorce, and we are much better friends then when we were married. Our son is also happy. As long as your future ex is a good father, then there is no reason why you can't arrange to share the children fifty fifty, you get them three days one week, four the next. Heck, having a parenting schedule is probably what it would take to get LDS men home with their children more.

However, if you can work it out, that is also great. Remember, it is your life, not your husbands, not God's or the Churches. You are a free being, created with your own free agency, and you do what is best for yourself and your children.

I have been married for almost ten years and I remember questioning my marriage during our honeymoon. We have been roomates for a while now and I haven't felt any romantic love or years, I actually feel some repulsion when he tries to touch me. Even when I was devoted to the Churh. It has gotten so bad that there is a cold void that can be felt between us at all times now. I don't think the love can come back. I married when I was 21 and I didn't know what I needed in a man. I didn't know myself. I realize that differences in religion might be a better legal reason to divorce than the lack of love/attraction because my husband might be the one leaving me if I go inactive. I had a cup f coffee last month and he said he would leave me if I kept on doing such things.
Thank you forbiddencokedrinker, you have been a great help to me!
Good thing this is anonymous because I have been revealing so much on here!



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 01/01/2012 08:53AM by angelina5.

A lot is happening and I feel good about it. I feel that I am finally getting the life that I want to live. 2012 is going be a great crossroad for me. I was planning on a 2012 separation months ago. I have known for a few years that we would separate soon but I was afraid and I was making sure that there were no hopes left. There are none left.

Sometimes when people learn about the falsehood of Mormonism, it throws them for a loop and they lose their bearings for awhile -- especially when they're raised in the Church. I didn't know your situation, and I was worried this was a snap decision within the first week of unbelief. It sounds like the wheels have been turning for some time though.

I hope everything works out well for you and your future ex.

Oh yes we have had problems for years! Dh told me that each year of his journal entry was depicting the misery of our marriage. This year is going to be the official end I think/

I stayed for years "for the children" and later they said they wondered why I stayed for so long and were relieved he was out of the house.

Ker-plunk.

Ana

You can get your husband out of the cult, by making his life pleasant on Sundays, making it a family day with the children, looking forward to little traditions, like a Sunday picnic in the park. He and the kids will become very reluctant to sacrifice their happiness for 3 hours.

Don't bad-mouth the church. You can (and should) take a stand, for your own integrity. Don't debate, but answer questions he might ask. Mormons manipulate members' emotions, so you fight back with love, empathy, joy, romance, etc.

I doubt that you will think all this is funny. You have just had the rug pulled out from under you. The Mormon cult is notorious for breaking up families. You will feel disgusted and quite depressed. When you walk out of the building, you will feel better.

Good luck to you, and good luck for your marriage! We are here for you.

This is great advice. I need to keep some dignity an not bad mouth too much. I am going o try to show my husband, in a diplomatic way, the discrepancies within the church. But he is so engrained. Even if he left the Church, we would still divorce. Our issues are far beyond religion. We have had problems for years. Thanks!

choosing. It was a blast. We made a list of everything here in Utah that we hadn't even considered before. Geode hunting in the west desert, hikes, picnics, Lagoon on Sunday (great time to go by the way!), camping, museums, floated down the Jordan rive in an $89 inflatable raft, made gourmet lunch, or just sat around and talked. When we first left the Church we had so much spare time it was like heaven.

Good luck to you Angelina! FYI, one of our other favorite things is Sunday Starbucks in American Fork at 10:00. We'll be there today if you are anywhere nearby!

dont forget to

return and report

:-)

Only in Mormonism would a person leave a spouse over the drinking of a cup of coffee. Unbelievable!

No kidding....talk about brainwashed.

Angelina5, you have my sincere & heartfelt empathy! I married at the age of 20. He was an RM, just off his mission, horny as hell. I had no clue who I really was, who HE really was, and what life was all about.
It took 13 years and 3 children before I figured it out, and realized I could no longer live with verbal abuse, chronic depression, suicidal thoughts, and a man I had grown completely estranged from in every possible way. We were just one of many casualties, effed up by the same soul-sucking, life-crushing entity that you and many others have survived.
You have all my best wishes, positive thoughts, and a New Year's hug!! Make 2012 YOUR year Angelina5; you DESERVE IT!! :D

I enjoy reading this forum on my cellphone while I'm at church walking the halls following my little one and wondering who else in the hallway (or chapel) is reading exmormon.org. LOL I totally look at people differently now and wonder if they know "the real truth?" I think reading it while I'm at church is akin to people who enjoy having sex in a public place. LOL Not that I would know as that's not my thing, but I think it's a thrill nonetheless. LOL

Lol this is exactly what I'm doing. I am in Sunday School and I view everyone so differently. The speeches during SM made no sense. Wow. This is an interesting story of un-conversion.

Yeah- just be careful. I somehow still got roped into teaching the 5 year olds. I couldn't come up with a reason quick enough not to. I'm sure it was "divine inspiration" that they asked me to teach. Yeah, that's it. They were divinely inspired to ask me to teach so that I wouldn't spend the time reading exmormon.org. It just gave me more inspiration to come home and post on exmormon.org. LOL Have fun in RS!

If you're ever called to something you don't want, just tell them to give you a day or so to pray about it or talk to your spouse. That will buy you some time to get out of it. ;)

Tell them you would love to, but it would violate your probation.

Thinking about you, Angelina!
Like you, I married young and we had problems before I left the church. I don't know where it will end up, but I am slowly finding myself as I shake off the years of brainwashing.

I tried going to church for a while even after I knew the truth... Bullsh*t Bingo was one of my favorite games to play during church: http://www.salamandersociety.com/bingo/

Thank you! 2012 is going to be good for me. Things are falling into places, discovering the truth behind the Church is part of it.

Angelina5--I feel badly for you. I went through a similar situation. My marriage was bad--no feelings, no love, and no caring. When I finally realized the church was a fraud, it only got worse. She got more TBM like and I totally divorced myself of the church. Of course, she was always been more married to the church than to me. I found I went through stages of pulling away from both her and the church. There is only so much you can take.

I have found that love is the greatest force on the earth. I found that you have to do the things in your life to find love and affection. Sometimes it is painful but worth it in the long run.