Today as I was gathering all of the paperwork for our taxes I kept reflecting back on past years of our finances and how different things are for us now. A few years ago when the recession hit we were still pretty TBM. We were starting to become dis-illusioned with the church but still sticking with it thinking it was just "Satan" working on destroying our testimonies. My husband held several callings that he dutifully fulfilled every week. We ended up taking some serious financial hits. I was laid off from work, had an unexpected high risk pregnancy, and the term "for better or worse, sickness and in health" really came into play. Nothing makes you appreciate a loving, helpful spouse like a vegetable who is suddenly unable to do anything for themselves or hold an actual conversation. During this time when we needed the very most help not a single person from our ward even called. As our financial position became more precarious I finally broke down and asked the Bishop for help. We were living on my unemployment soley for a home that was purchased with 2 full time incomes. We just weren't making it. I was denied any help whatsoever even though we paid tithing. Why? Because my husband hadn't been able to fulfill his callings for weeks and the Bishop was angry about trying to find replacements. I couldn't believe it. It wasn't as though he didn't want to fulfill his duties, he was physically unable due to illness. That year was the first time we didn't pay tithing on our tax refund. Things got worse, other events unfolded, and we ended up losing our home to foreclosure. At least it was an FHA loan. We are still dealing with all of it. In an attempt to save the house we lost all of our retirement funds, stocks, bonds, etc. We ended up cashing out every asset we had avaliable to try and remedy the situation. We also maxed out every credit card in our name. I went to the temple during this time in hopes of answers. All I got was mixed messages about crappy handshakes. No manna from heaven. No magical blessings from paying tithing all those years. I prayed like crazy and cried even harder. I have no idea what our return will be this year but whatever amount it will be for paying bills, not fun money purchases. This is the first year that we are doing fairly okay. Things aren't easy, we live a frugal lifestyle but all our needs are met and every month all of our bills are paid without stress. We even have a little money for extras, like real TV and the internet. I'm currently agnostic in my beliefs but I think I should be thanking someone for getting me out of the church. Had I stayed I am almost certain we would have ended up in a much worse position than the one we are in now. So much for a testimony in the blessings of tithing...

Our son was on a mission. I got breast cancer. My father in law was diagnosed the same day with mesothelioma a 100% fatal cancer.

My husband was coming apart. his parents live in Az. we live in Seattle. He couldn't focus at work.It was a horrible time. The bishop came up to my husband and said isn't it wonderful all the blessings you get when you have a child on a mission? Husbands reply was NO! If he doesn't get home pretty soon my whole family will be dead. The bish just gave him a dirty look and walked away.

Husbands father died 3 weeks later. I drove 100 miles round trip everyday for radiation my husband was in Az taking care of his dads situation. Not one person offered to help with anything. I would get home too exhausted to take my shoes and coat off before I went to bed. I would call ahead to restaurants on my way home so I could have something for dinner. I did that everyday for 7 weeks. Not one person asked if they could help. No meals, no cards, no flowers, nothing. No bishop we were not blessed. I think that was when I started to ask myself why i was a member.

If you ever know someone that sick, take them a sack lunch, change their sheets and wash their pajamas. That would have been a god send for me.

Gotta say as a former Stake Finance Advisor - i.e. assisting members (in England) who were struggling with debt, the ones who managed to get financial aid (or so it seems looking back) weren't the long in the tooth 6+ kids paid tithing all their lives, they were instead the recent(ish) converts (after say a year).

(New converts were given assistance in the form of a member, perhaps myself or their bishop going to the store with them and ensuring they only bought appropriate items in budget.)

Basically any financial aid was the carrot to keep new members active but the stick to beat the rest.

Ax

Okay, so we never used to use our tithing contributions statement to get more taxes...you know, trying to get gain for it? Whatever, I was a dumass...

Anyway, when we started using our tax statements we discovered that we could get a couple hundred dollars on our tax return, which was worth it, and to be honest, in order to be temple worthy members we did a lot of scraping to get by, so I used that extra tax return to get something into savings because we could not afford a savings account. In order to be righteous and faithful and we were pinching pennies 'til they bled just to keep our heads above water. Meanwhile, we were paying 450 a month to keep a recommend so we could have too many callings and duties to spend time at home where we were needed.

After we left the church we started putting that tithing money in a savings account. At the end of the year we have an extra 5000 dollars that we did not have before.

But what about that deduction worth 200 bucks? Who cares? I'd rather have that 5K in the bank.

TSCC says you will get your blessings in heaven AFTER YOU DIE.

So the members should tell the Church "you will get your tithing money AFTER I DIE.

Do not pay tithing during your working lifetime. Instead you should pay the money into IRA accounts (up to the maximum allowed yearly limit) and pay any additional "tithing" money into a savings account. In other words, keep the tithing money for your own use.

When you reach retirement age, use the money for your own retirement. If you are fortunate enough to still have money sitting around at the time you are about to die, then you can instruct your heirs to pay tithing then.

Subsequently, I had to file the short tax form, couldn't itemize decuctions and therefore saw no tax benefits from tithing.

Amazingly, when I stopped paying tithing, I was able to buy my own home within a year, and had the mortgage interest deduction helping me out.

Odd. I'm more blessed by NOT paying tithing...