White shirt and tie, short hair. Non-mormons seldom wear white shirts.
Females look like they are wearing a gunny sack (if older). If younger they wear 18 layers of clothes (to cover arms, shoulders neckline, and legs of their (otherwise) "immodest" dress, or in summer they wear "shorts" below their knees, with five layers of shirts to cover all the upper body parts.
A short sleeved white shirt with tie in warm weather. Non-LDS might wear white shirts with a suit or jacket, but trousers with a short sleeve white shirt and tie is a dead giveaway.
Ok, I know this is going to sound weird but I think many mormons (especially the men) look fleshy. Not really fat, just fleshy, fleshy faced, soft and squishy.
I am glad to know that I am not the only one who has noticed this strange phenomenon. Why do you think they are so fleshy? It is as though mormon men never lose their baby fat.
I've noticed this too! Judging by the ward cookbooks, it's poor diet and no time to exercise. Who needs to be fit in this like when you're living for the afterlife, baby!
The Mormon diet consists of a lot of sugar and carbs. two kids before your out of school. 5- 6 by the time your in your early thirtys. Demanding job, an extra 10-20 hours a week of church doesn't leave much time to care for yourself.
There is most definitely a Utah/Mormon accent. Both Roseanne Barr and Jon Huntsman Sr. (love him, though) have it. Listen to Jon Sr. for the perfect example of it.
Because after the initial introductory period, they get over the fact that they're doing something REALLY HARD for ethical reasons. Because most vegans really are doing what they're doing for ethical reasons so once they get used to it, they don't need external validation.
it really depends on where you live and where you are going.
to utah mormons wearing slippers (sandals) without socks is an abomination --pretty much death on the spot. at least that's been my experience with people from those latitudes.
hawaii mormons think that wearing socks + slippers is the ultimate weirdness.
I had a few Mormon encounters when my husband and I lived in Europe. Here are a couple of situations in which we determined we were dealing with people of the LDS persuasion...
#1 We were at a small inn in Poland frequented by American military wives... It was near the Polish pottery district. One night, my husband and I were having dinner and there was a large gaggle of women sitting in the corner talking very loudly. I immediately was a little suspicious. Then one of them started talking about her blog. Another talked about scrapbooking. The innkeeper asked the ladies if any of them liked to drink. They all loudly said "No!" in a chorus. The clincher was when the topic of General Conference came up.
#2 In Liechtenstein, my husband and mother-in-law and I were in a gift shop, looking for a mug and a couple of souvenir magnets. I had found what I wanted and got in line. Unfortunately, there were several uptight looking white folks bending the shop proprietor's ear. For several minutes, I listened to the guy yammering on and noticed he was wearing a BYU polo. He was talking about his mission and completely oblivious that there were folks who wanted to check out. I finally said-- perhaps louder than I intended to-- "I guess it's time to find another gift shop." And these people had the nerve to look at me like I was being rude!
#3 In Switzerland, my husband and I literally ran into a large group of Mormon mishies dressed in their Sunday best. Guess they were on their way to some kind of conference. That time, it was pretty obvious.
#4 In France, while dining on an exquisite lunch in a Parisian bistro, we saw too harried looking mishies hurrying past. I couldn't help but feel a little sorry for those two guys in a country so well-known for its lovely wines and not being able to enjoy any...
I was in a boarding gate at Frankfurt Airport, waiting for an SAS flight from Frankfurt to Stockholm. Toward the back of the gate area I heard a loud group of large, middle-aged people, all dressed like it was Sunday (but it was actually Good Friday 2005). Once I was on board and headed for the bathrooms, I passed the group and could see LDS missionary nametags. I don't know if they were senior missionaries or perhaps part of the MP crew (mission president and wife or counselors and wives), but it was about 3-4 middle aged couples. They exited the terminal at the same time I did and they were met by two or three young men in missionary attire.
I had flown from California to Chicago to Frankfurt and this was the last leg of my flight, so I asked for coffee several times on board. I speak some Swedish and at one point the flight attendant asked me if I knew who the noisy people in the back of the plane were. I said they appeared to be adult Mormon missionaries (or mission officials) and I told her she needn't worry about running out of coffee. Up to then, she didn't know that Mormons don't drink coffee or tea (when anyone is looking).
Women have that 'voice' that makes me cringe. They wear their dresses to their ankles. They look uncomfortable in anything but church clothes.
To me, the majority look rather soft and out of shape. I think it's because when you wear G's you don't do much. You get too hot and sweaty. Combine that with lots of wheat and sugar.
The men always seem like they are terrified of me. The women must plain don't like me. I'm always getting the 'look' like I can't believe you just said that. I say what I mean, and I mean what I say. Mormons are very uncomfortable with that. They prefer their codes and avoidances.
Men and women have that voice. The women sound like they are four years old and the men sound like they are special - or like they are softly trying to hypnotize you. I have a friend who was raised in Logan and refuses to ever move back to Utah until the men quit talking in that creepy, soft, hypno-voice.
Also, the majority of TBM women will either dress like Mia mentioned, in oversized church-sacks or they look like Stepford wives with the tiny, sized-two body, big plastic surgery boobs, slightly overdone makeup and wearing the same clothes as their 14-year-old daughter. This makes them look years older because the juxtaposition of little girl clothes and 40-year-old faces is scary. Oh, and don't forget the bleached blonde, perfect hair and overly modest covered shoulders, draped with a Juicy Couture, Coach, or Dooney and Burke handbag. These are women with no education trying to hang on to their gravy-train husbands because they can't make it on their own.
Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 04/22/2012 04:22PM by CA girl.
The gym I go to is in the same shopping center as a grocery store, that I stop in a couple times a week after working out. There are usually about 3 checkers at the time I go and one has that voice that she talks like a 4 year old and sounds like she is talking to another 4 year old.
"Swipe your card" "Enter you pin number and press the greeeen buTTon."
I've only used the machines thousands of times. I don't need to be talked down to like I have never seen one before. I refuse to go through her line, and will stand in another line, even if no one is her line.
I saw a young mother at the store the other day sporting this look. The thing is, her teeshirt underneath the tank top was so see-through. It was like she was trying to show off her garments. Not a good look. Even teenagers wear that look around here.
They have a slightly stuffed look to thair clothes like theres just to much clothes there to move well. Theres a reason why most places have undies like ours because its more easy to move in them.
Smiling in the front room with a spouse, and there are pictures on the wall like Temples, certian favorite Jesus pics among the mormons that look typically mormon, etc.
My brother's downstairs Mo neighbors came home from church and put a Romney poster on their outside door. Wonder if they were giving them out at their ward?
Not sure if this goes for everywhere, or just Utah mormons, but here's how I recognize them:
Ladies all have A-line haircuts and very teased hair Ladies wear little capped sleeve tees under tank tops meant to be worn alone Ladies talk in this super-sweet high pitched voice Men act very uncomfortable around attractive females as if you are going to try to seduce them or something Men and women both use "Oh my heck!"
Especially the Utah mormons have this strange accent. Almost between minnesota and Texas hick like. The trendy mormon women have two toned hair and spike it up in the back. Sort of like Kate Gosling. They are wearing Aeropostal clothes trying to look like their teenage daughters. Fake boobs tons of makeup and a pretend smile. The heavier LDS women dress like pioneers and talk like the women in general conference. Drone slow high pitched. Almost like Kindergarten teachers. They are all white and blond. The Men wear their shirts tucked in with belts. The are very clean shaven and hair is cut short. Lots of cheesy hats and logo shirts. Lots of "oh my heck", "shiz" etc... ewwww
I don't know just how common it really is with Mormons, but my own family does it as a silly and weird alternative to "Flip"ping the Bird.
Unlike the bird, which is a very simple gesture using only one hand, the "Turkey" involves the use of both hands (better not attempt it while driving!): one hand clenched in a fist with the pinkie raised; the other hand open with all five fingers spread out; then place the fist, opposite from the raised pinkie, into the palm of the open hand, thus forming the basic shape of a gobbler.
Seriously, don't they realize how incredibly lame they look whenever they do that!? But then, my mother has always seemed to be magnetically attracted to any and every thing lame.
No boundaries. I can tell if someone is mormon if they are:
• Way too overly friendly to the point of being inappropriate for the situation.
• Give way too many personal details about themselves and their families. In the first five minutes, you'll know how many kids the person has, what schools they go to, how old they are, what the dog's name is, what size bra the wife wears, which ids are still being breastfed, what everyone does for a living, where they live, and of course, where they go to church.
• They'll ask inappropriately personal questions with an undercurrent of judgment in their tone. "How much money do you give to your church?"
1)Gaggle of kids with a wide age range. Obvious Mormon Families at the park yesterday (gasp- they were breaking the Sabbath!)had a 17 year old boy all the way down to a two year old girl.
2)Fabric flowers on some article of clothing- on a headband or cardigan sweater, etc.
3)Full makeup on even on a Sunday when the rest of the world barely showers.
4)Men always have a collared shirt on of some sort- polos or button up short sleeved shirt for casual wear.
5)Men always have an anonymous nice white guy face. You couldn't pick that guy out of a lineup if your life depended on it.
6)Clothes that cover garments of course.
Takes me two seconds to spot a member. I don't even have to look for g-lines at this point. I'm a never-mo, but a two year stint in Utah and life in the PNW has made me quite the Mormon spotter. I haven't been wrong yet.
You would mistake me for being a Kolobian. I am your typical looking white dude with a conservative hair cut and a well maintained bread. Aside from some tattoos (only visible if I want them to be) and my random cursing you could not tell me apart. Yes, I live in the morgdoor.
i keep reading about how out of shape mormons are but i always thought it was the opposite. to me the girls always look too thin probably suffering from anorexia. i think as just another way to come across as perfect.