Posted by:
forestpal
(
)
Date: May 05, 2012 03:29AM
I wish this syndrome had a name! This is very obvious in children and animals. For example, we have a couple of relatives that are extremely annoyed by children, and are very vocal about it. The minute these people come into the room, I can see my grandchildren's behavior change--for the worse. I can tell when my daughter is talking to a cult member on the phone, as opposed to a friend or a client. Her voice gets higher and louder, and she is not herself. Our dog pesters and jumps on only one family member--the one who does not like dogs. Our cat was the same way. She could sense if a guest was afraid of her, and she would jump out from under the person's chair and grab an ankle with both paws. (It was rather funny to watch the person scream and jump up.)
I feel just as you do, with most encounters with former "friends." As you wrote, it is like the fight or flight instinct. I have PTSD, and these encounters often create unpleasant reminders. With great effort on my part, I got over the initial shunning and the gossip--but now, years later, I'm just sick to death of it all, and I avoid Mormons altogether.
If I'm out and about, happily living my life and working, and I run into any of those "dead relationships", I simply look past them, or nod, and keep walking. I hang onto my happiness, and I keep the same expression on my face, and concentrate on the task at hand. I have to make an effort to put them out of my mind, as soon as they are out of my sight. After all, that's what they do with me.
As Mormons, we were taught to forgive, and not seek revenge. We were also taught to accept abuse. Rudeness is just the Mormon way. Whatever. I don't accept that, and it feels damn good to snub them.
Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 05/05/2012 03:34AM by forestpal.