As a teenage ExMo who hasn't actually come out yet about my apostasy, I am still expected to go to seminary, the Morg-instituted gospel education program for high schoolers. This year we are learning the D&C/Church History (y'know, the whitewashed version). I've never really studied D&C outside of the juicy stuff like Section 132, etc, but from what I've learned from this class.. Nothing could be a faker attempt at writing revelations from God. Old English mixed in with words that just happen to have a holy connotation; good one Joseph Smith!
The absurdity of the scriptures we read is just the beginning, the class itself is pretty bad. We're the group that does jazz band before school, so class starts at 5:30AM; I have to get out of bed by 4:30-45. Our teacher is a nice lady who can be fun to talk to.. as long as it's not about the Gospel. She is pretty much every TBM annoyance imaginable wrapped up into one. Some of the ridiculous things I've witnessed her do just this year include:
•Gushing about how the law of consecration is a wonderful idea, when really it's glorified socialism.
•Read on to us about the prophecies concerning the end of the world.. as she and the class laugh on and on, as though it's fiction (when they should be believing otherwise).
•In the middle of a lesson, she suddenly goes on a monologue about how we're the chosen generation, cleave to our covenants, etc, which brings her and her 17 y/o daughter (also a student) to tears.

So RfMers; just how bad (or good?) was seminary for you as a TBM?

It's funny because my old young men's president (who is like 40 or so) told me that his leader's told HIM that his was the chosen generation. I was told my generation was the chosen one (I'm almost 20), and I bet in 10 years the teenagers will be being told that THEY are the chosen generation. It really ties into the whole elitism thing the Mormons have going. Not only are they a part of the ONLY true church on the earth, but they are also the CHOSEN/best generation.

But about seminary, mine was also before school, so I had to get up at about 5 to make it on time. The only clear thing I can remember is this one girl. She and I would always insult each other (and it wasn't flirting). We weren't the best of buds. One morning she was answering a question and used some rare descriptive word. I said to her "Wow! That's a pretty big word for you, you must be feeling proud of yourself? Do you actually know what it means though?" or something like that. She wound up crying and leaving the room. Apparently her boyfriend had broken up with her the day before! So yeah I ended up saying sorry, but we still continued to be incredibly rude to each other every day until she moved.

Also I remember we would play the most horrible games like Scripture Mastery Battleship where you have to quote the scripture to be able to attack a space. Half of us didn't know/care about the scripture masteries so we would just end up sitting there doing nothing while the hardcore students would end up being super competitive. We ended up playing these games about 10 minutes a day and the whole time on Fridays -.-

My mom is 80. She told me when she was a youth they told her that her generation was the special chosen generation for the last days.

I was told the same thing when I was young.

My kids were told the same thing.

I expect when I have grandchildren they will be told the same thing.

Isn't it wonderful?



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 12/08/2010 09:37AM by madiran.

Another nail the church is inadvertently hammering into its own coffin. "I don't think we teach that.."



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 12/08/2010 09:45AM by Strykary.

I slept every day in seminary for four years. Yup, guess who still graduated? =)

I kind of liked seminary. I took it during the day and the teacher was okay. He had some strange ideas but was easy going and since he was pretty laid back, seminary was a break from school and I could use it as a sort of study period at times. I can't say I learned a lot, but it was okay.

You know, the only thing I remember about seminary was dreading that someone would let the secret out that I could play piano and I'd end up that sucker having to play every day.

And also my generation was the chosen one! (I'm 30)

We were the chosen ones too

Oh, God. The worst seminary experience was sort of the catalyst for why I left the church.
My first week of seminary was when I was fourteen (ninth grade) and the teacher proceeded to tear the pages out of the Bible violently, then threw it across the room.
He did this in an attempt to show us the Book of Mormon was the true scriptures.
I just maintain that anyone willing to destroy a book, even if it is "just" the Bible, is of the devil and certainly shouldn't be in a classroom teaching children.

Any way. D&C/Church History the only year I didn't do seminary.

I did all the other years. But the year before in Grade 11 we were studying The Old Testament and Pearl of Great Price. That sent me over the edge. Listening to that BS then going to school and hearing about how the earth is millions of years old, evolution, etc. I couldn't live the lie any longer. One day my dad dropped me off at seminary and I just skipped it and went to school. That day when I got home I caught hell. It was my first step out the door of the church.

I still don't understand why my dad believes that BS. He's an educated man, wasn't born in the church, etc. Anyone with any linear thoughts can tell it's all BS.

What a waste of time seminary was for me. My mom would drop me off on her way to work because it was sooo important that I go every day before school. She did this with the assumption that I could find a ride back to school with some of the other kids. Being the new kid who just moved into the ward, it became apparent that they weren't going to accommodate me in any way. Every day I would end up frantically trying to call someone from the church phone before they locked up the building, then sit on the church steps in tears wondering if anyone would come looking for me when I didn't show up at school.

I suggested to my mom that this was such a big problem that I should just forgo seminary and she was absolutely horrified at the thought.

I hated seminary after that year and didn't bother graduating when it became my own responsibility to follow through with completing the course my junior/senior year.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 12/08/2010 01:01AM by vhainya.

vhainya Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> What a waste of time seminary was for me. My mom
> would drop me off on her way to work because it
> was sooo important that I go every day before
> school. She did this with the assumption that I
> could find a ride back to school with some of the
> other kids. Being the new kid who just moved into
> the ward, it became apparent that they weren't
> going to accommodate me in any way. Every day I
> would end up frantically trying to call someone
> from the church phone before they locked up the
> building, then sit on the church steps in tears
> wondering if anyone would come looking for me when
> I didn't show up at school.

I taught early morning seminary and we had four classes (9, 10, 11 and 12th grades) and too often, the kids who could drive would get out before the others and just ditch everyone. More than once, I gave kids rides to school, which was against the rules, but what was I supposed to do? Another kid in my class was home schooled and her parents were never on time. So I would wait with her, outside because if we were alone inside we might accidentally have sex or something. :P

d&c seminary planted seeds of doubt in me; the zion's camp fiasco especially.

oh, look at how nicely those seeds have blossomed eh?

I never thought seminary should be more important than school, but it was. It didn't matter if I was tired from doing my homework late into the night, or if I needed the extra time to review right before a test, or if I desperately needed my sleep because my brother would make noise until 3:00 AM after his night shift. I was not healthy, and my tennis coach told my mother I needed to take a nap in the afternoon, when it was quiet--but I had to practice the piano and do my chores instead.

Sick or well, awake or asleep, dressed or in my pajamas--I had to be at seminary on time, hours before sunrise. It was so worthless.

I was skinny as a bean-pole, with dark circles under my eyes--my friends would tease me about it--uand was usually nervous and exhausted. I spent a year abroad, so I studied extra hard, and graduated high school in just two years. D'ya think the Mormons would let me graduate from seminary in two years? Not.

Religious indoctrination is far more important than something like a public education.

*gag* So sorry, forestpal.

That's exactly how it is for me now. Seminary > Education, it has been that way since my Freshman year. If I miss one day of seminary because I can't get up, I get grounded, if I don't do well in school, nothing happens. In my family, Chores and Church supersede education.

"My school teachers must have thought I got stoned every day during lunch. I couldn't stay awake"

Exactly how I feel most of the time. Although..now that I have a car, I can pick up some coffee on the way to seminary. Doesn't change the fact that I, like you did, have bags under my eyes.

He told me that I should beware of church history because people fall away from the church after getting into it. He was right. LOL

Each year about a week before seminary would start up again there was a seminary orientation meeting after Sacrament Meeting for perspective seminary students and their parents.

During the meeting prior to my last year, the Bishop said something to the effect that if we faithfully attended seminary (we had early morning seminary), the Lord would bless us with good grades in school. My buddy sitting next to me leaned over and whispered something to me that made us both laugh. The seminary teacher noticed us giggling and asked if we had something to share with the rest of the group. My buddy spoke up and said "Yeah, when is that "blessing" going to kick in because my grades have gone down steadily each year I have attended seminary." Haaa haaa, they didn't have an answer for him.

My school teachers must have thought I got stoned every day during lunch. I couldn't stay awake. Whatever class I had after lunch I would walk in and within five minutes my head would be on the desk and I would be fast asleep.

I was so bored with it, I often snoozed in class. That could be why I don't remember very much of it.

I am unsure of some of my memories of early morning seminary due to sleep deprivation, but I recall having an hour long discussion about the dimensions of the City of Enoch. I remember we referred to a scripture in Revelation and some other sources and determined that the City of Enoch is a spacefaring cube 1000 miles on a side that will one day come to rest in the Gulf of Mexico after the Earth becomes a Terrestrial sphere in the Millennium.

I failed the AP Math exam, but I graduated from Seminary and that's the important thing.

georgedubya Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
>
> •In the middle of a lesson, she suddenly goes on
> a monologue about how we're the chosen generation,
> cleave to our covenants, etc, which brings her and
> her 17 y/o daughter (also a student) to tears.

I really resent that, I gotta tellya. I was told when I was in Seminary, 20 years ago, that I was the chosen generation. Clearly, this chick's daughter and I are of different generations. We can't all be chosen. What the hell?

:>D

I saw my old seminary teacher (from the 80s) on Facebook drinking booze. I guess he finally saw the light.

I remember trying to sleep during seminary because it was usually so boring. I also remember looking at the clock all the time and thinking damn we still have 15 minutes left.

Seminary was a big part of the indoctrination process. Keep them tired and feeding them BS everyday and they will come to believe it.

I was doing the P90x workout the other day and they keep talking about this energy drink you should buy throughout the workouts. You hear it some often that you start thinking maybe I should try it. I told my TBM brother about this when I did the workout with him. Hope he can make the conection to the church.

I know with every fiber of my being that widow-loving Monson will announce new revelation to that effect come April conference. How do I know that? I closed my eyes and shut off my brain and then let my tongue ramble on for a good long while spouting common Mormon platitudes to the Mormon god in the sky, somewhere near Kolob. After I woke up I felt for sure that, yes, the mid '70s generation was the chosen generation, and no, there was no way any other generation was chosen. Well, maybe chosen a little, 20% chosen at the most.

My first year at early morning seminary was all scripture chase. Day after day after day. This constant aggressive competition had us so wired up we all looked like rabid dobermans.

Second year we were bored to tears and often death by a man who stood at the front of the room day after day and murmured things; his experiences, his testimony, his weaknesses and his family life. Murmur murmur murmur. Our eyes were more glazed than donuts. Murmur murmur murmur....

Third year was a wild-eyed lady who'd often get angry if she thought anyone was mocking her. I don't think we advanced three pages into the text. Rant after rant after rant. We'd take bets to see who the daily unlucky would be. Beyond her earshot we all agreed she was nuts. And that's not hazelnuts either.

The fourth, and thank Shiva the final year was an older guy trying to be a teenager like us. He' sit on the tables and swing his legs. Speak our lingo. Loosen his tie. It was bearable because anything was better than the year before.

There was no final test. No oral or written examinations. We were graduated based on our attendance. I still have that cute "diploma" somewhere in a box. I should put it on my wall. After all, that's where I got my most important education, isn't it?

And my generation was THE chosen generation. Got it? Jut waiting on Monson to confirm it.

picked up a boy in the class and threw him against the wall. This was early morning seminary, and the kid "David" was a very popular student who was always making sarcastic remarks under his breath to make us laugh and help us stay awake. The seminary teacher, who was the epitome of the dictator Mormon male, got finally got fed up and picked David up and literally threw him into the wall. David wasn't hurt but was FURIOUS and stomped out, followed by his football buddy friends and a handful of girls. The rest of us just stared, appalled, wondering if we should get up too but then the teacher just dismissed us too and we all left. That morning, all the Mormon kids in our class sat around the cafeteria before school (obviously we got there very early) and talked about mass apostasy. It wasn't necessary though because David's dad was more important in the Mormon hierarchy than our seminary teacher and when a few of us showed up the next morning (the majority had the guts to absolutely refuse to attend) we were told that we had a substitute and a new teacher would be called immediately. Weirdly, IMO, last I heard David, who is now in his 40s, served a mission, temple married, is still active and holds a high calling. If it had been me, I'd have been out in high school.

PS: I was the chosen generation back in the early 1980s



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 12/08/2010 11:56AM by CA girl.

I got an early-morning paper route just to get out of seminary. It was worth it.

My first post here :)

I asked my seminary teacher how, if the Garden of Eden were in America, did all the people move from there to the Old World? He told me because this was the time of pangea, and everything was one big continent! (I went on to get a degree in Anthropology, so I knew off the bat that was the stupidest thing I'd ever heard).

When I was in seminary was when GBH made the announcement that you should only wear ONE pair of earrings. Well, I had a few more than that, and EVERY DAY the boy who sat in front of me would pester me to take out my earrings. He told me the scars left behind would be my "battle wounds".

I'm sure there's more, but a lot of it runs together with institute... which was, in my opinion worse. But it got me free parking on campus :)