Called my mum today said she was just leaving mass. She's a nevermo, we are from generations of Maltese Catholics but she hasn't been to church for years.
I said why? Why go to mass, you haven't been for years. She said where else do you turn during times like this?
I don't understand it. Where is the comfort in this invisible 'omnipotent' being that didn't do shit to stop it in the first place? What makes her think 'god' cares enough to comfort her after years of being a lapsed believer? Belief is the funniest thing and a church is the last place I would find comfort now.

I'm lazy/my mind wonders a lot when I try to meditate on my own. Plus, I don't practice enough to be very good at it.

I don't know what it is that is troubling your mother, but there must be a payoff for her in the experience.

That's how I feel about Catholic mass. I don't really believe or agree with much of anything that is said there, but I find the experience soothing. It's peaceful, quiet, and relaxing.

The other day I was having a difficult time, and decided I would give religion a shot. I put on a makeshift eyepatch, found a secluded spot, and invoked the Flying Spaghetti Monster to lend me one of its noodly appendages. Before all of this, of course, I said some profane things that were sure to scare Elohim and the holy ghost away so that they wouldn't interfere. Afterwards I felt very much at peace. True story.

They say religion is a crutch for a reason. When you are wounded you often need a crutch. It doesn't have to be a physical wound.

Religion is one of the more benign crutches and costs you a lot less in the long run than say, alcohol, drugs, or shopping. Unless of course Mormonism is your crutch and there is nothing more expensive than that. The tithing is bad enough, but forking over your time and self esteem on top of it really runs up the tab at the company store.

I wish you and your mother all the best coping skills in the world.

If she has happy, peaceful memories of Mass as a child, she may be tapping in to that. Also the low lighting, uplifting music, nice art/stained glass is comforting in and of itself. If you randomly visit a historic church or cathedral, there is always a sense of hushed calm inside.

Not to mention the saving grace of Jesus Christ.

"Also the low lighting, uplifting music, nice art/stained glass is comforting in and of itself. If you randomly visit a historic church or cathedral, there is always a sense of hushed calm inside."

The antithesis of the atmosphere of a Mormon church.

I have a friend who has been my best friend since kindergarten. We are now 55 so that has been a very long time. He is like my brother and I love him dearly.

About 25 years ago he was in a motorcycle accident that almost took his life but he fought back and overcame. His body was broken in so many places that it changed his life forever but he has the best attitude of anyone I have ever known and through his numerous brushes with death because of his broken body he still maintains his sense of humor and fantastic attitude.

He was a social worker working with abused children in Utah of all places and he became inactive many years ago because of the many experiences he had dealing with bishops and stake presidents who were child molesters and who the church protected. He became so disgusted with the church because of these many experiences that he could not stomach even stepping into a church for many years.

He has recently retired due to his health and several months ago he told me he has returned to church. He has done a complete 180 and now believes the church has done so much for him and his family and he doesn't know how he could have survived without it. As I listened to him I wondered who this person was pretending to be my best friend.

Luckily we have been friends for so long that my apostacy doesn't affect our friendship and he won't turn away from our friendship because of the church, but he has become as TBM as they get. He won't even cuss any more and we used to cuss like drunken sailors when we got together.

As I have thought about his return to mormonism I have come to the conclusion that he has grown past the point in his life where he feels imortal and now sees his mortality as a reality. The sight of his mortality has given him pause to reconsider religion and that is why he has returned.

For me it doesn't matter. He is my brother from another mother and as long as he doesn't let religion interfere with our friendship it just doesn't matter to me. Anyway, I think when people return to religion it is because it gives them a sense of security when facing the possiblity of death or extreme hardship.

Train a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not turn from it.

Very true words. Not always, but often.

Glad I was not BIC.

That used to be one of my favorite scriptures to quote. Until I went my own way.

I still like the scripture and use it to illustrate more secular aspects of child rearing.

Beats me.....it never once occurred to me to pray or seek guidance from any religious individual whenever I've gone through a tough patch. I always figured it was none of their friggin' business so why would I want to share anything with someone I don't know from Adam?

Yes, why do they? When the snake-handling preacher was dying from a rattlesnake bite, his flock turned to prayer. When that didn't work, they posted more requests for prayer on Facebook.

Dude did not abide. He died.

The simple act of taking the preacher to the hospital immediately would have saved his life.

Did the flock learn that prayer is ineffective in countering venom? No, they did not.

In other words, people turn to all sorts of rituals and unfounded beliefs when faced with difficult times because they would rather stick with the group than risk being ousted for unapproved, reality-based activity.

From the age of 13-23ish I was a Jehovah’s Witness and it was my life. I left about three or four years ago now and am glad I did. I am a better person for it now and seeing how none of my family has ever been part of any church they understood my choice. I learned a lot, became a better person, met many wonderful people, and had more food for thought than I knew what to do with. I will never go back and at the same time there is much I miss about it. When you become part of a religion you often become part of a community, feel as though you are something bigger than yourself and event though we are not perfect simply being part of this can be very gratifying. I feel for many people who have left and come back to religion or find it for the first time they are simply satisfying a need or coming back to it. Ignorance can be bliss or pretty darn close to it.

That's exactly what I was going to say.

It is a coping mechanism.

It's a way to revert into a fetal mind when the going gets tough and know a parent will take care of everything. Daddy is going to make everything OK.

It is a way to abdicate responsibility for everthing to something external. It's a good way to live when you don't have to be the one in charge.

It's comforting to have answers and think you get to live forever on Sugar Mountain when you die. That makes the pain of a difficult time not so bad. You get answers and have a ready made reason for whatever bad thing happens.

There's a reason religon sells so well. It's the spiritual asprin for whatever pains you. For those of us who know it is really a placebo, there is not placebo effect.

Religion is the opiate of the masses. - Marx

Full quote:

"Religion is the sigh of the oppressed creature, the heart of a heartless world, and the soul of soulless conditions. It is the opium of the people"

they conspire to abandon it.

People turn to lots of things during hard times. Booze, drugs, sex, entertainment, sports, and religion. Some people become addicted to these things.

The Mormon religion always made everything worse. In my hardest times, I turned to doctors and nurses, the fire department, my father, or spent time alone, hugging my dog, and praying in silence.

My cousin divorced a husband who had been beating her for 30 years. She is beautiful, and has money of her own, is an artist, and trains horses. Now, in the aftermath, she has turned to the temple, and volunteers there almost every day (as much as they will allow her). She says that is her world, now. All her other hobbies and joys are on hold. I'm hoping this is a temporary condition.

My brother was a bully, and mean to my parents, and said very nasty things about Jesus and God and churches, etc. He rebelled, got into fist fights, threw tantrums to get his way, and ruled the family, because we were afraid of him. If we crossed him, he would threaten to kill himself. Above all, he hated the Mormon church.

As soon as my parents died, he had a nervous breakdown (my other brother said he was getting out of packing and moving, which we had to do for him). After he got out of the mental hospital, he started going to church, and never missed bearing his testimony on fast Sunday. The bishop finally had to tell him to limit his time, to give other people a chance. He quit smoking, when he got cancer. He started yelling at my sons, because they didn't go on missions. He would quote the BOM and D&C at us, and he took great pride in being an expert in BY's Discourses. He bragged about being a God with many perfected women as wives in the Hereafter. He said that all the unattached females in our family (including me and my daughters) would be his wives in the Celestial Kingdom. His hatred turned to women and to people of other races and other religions. I think he was trying to emulate his relativew, who were important church leaders, and these were the traits that would gain him power. He had the biggest, most pompous, fake, Mormon funeral you could imagine. His family invited several dignitaries and GA's to speak, but no one could make it.

Here's another example, of when this happens. If someone finds out their partner is having an affair they'll often call their parents for advice/support.

I guess it's because we hate being in a situation where we feel helpless and not in control of a situation which is affecting us so deeply. We just want to find someone who can help.

I guess it's our nature to feel that we need to do something. We can't just sit there and do nothing. So if other humans can't help us, we start appealing to some unseen force, anyone, who can help. We're just desperate for the situation to change.

If you try praying and you're someone who thinks like I do now, you end up saying to yourself, "Don't be silly. What are you doing?"

The secular hospital surgery and radiation centers officially recommended that patients go to church and attend their hospital based support groups where religion is discussed. I fingured it's hard enough to deal with serious longterm pain and treatments without having to bite my tongue or play along in a "support group."

After completing the surgeries and radiation, I changed to a different cancer center for infusions and followup care. They offer the same programs but without the zeal and constant pressure to participate in them. It's a relief to have a say without having medical people roll their eyes and needle me about getting unwanted non-medical services I consider to be inapproiate.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 11/25/2012 02:40PM by Cheryl.

The simple answer: it fills a need.

Let me answer your question with another:

Why do people putz around on RFM when they have important essays to write?

TeeHee.

Check the date I posted this. I hate when old threads resurface it's embarrassing.

Oops. Good God, that is an oldie. I thought these things were deleted after a couple of months.

However, my question still applies.

"A Man Has To Believe In Something,

I Believe I Will Have Another Drink."

W.C. Fields


This sign was hung above the bar at my favorite watering hole, back in the day...

Pretty much sums up the Human Condition here on Earth...

ahhhh...because it helps ease the pain & gives you something to believe in.......because religion is based on faith; we don't know for sure it's there but we want to believe that it is....we want to believe that GOD is kind & forgiving....HE will save us if we choose to be saved....that is the way it has always been.....remember that movie w/ Keifer Sutherland? He was a rapist, brutal killer.... He never believed in GOD but when he was strapped to the gurney waiting for that lethal injection, man he repented very quickly....same as it ever way....

Many, likely even MOST, atheists go to their graves never "repenting". In fact MOST of the world neither knows nor cares about the "Jesus" of the Western World. It is only smug arrogance that makes Christians believe "everyone" repents on their deathbed.

When you're in times of doubt and uncertainty, when you don't know
where to turn and the whole world seems to be crashing down on
you, just handle poisonous snakes. It will lift your spirits and calm
your savage breast.