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Posted by: tawanda2011 ( )
Date: July 13, 2012 12:08AM

My sweet and loving Mom just died in my arms. I was able to hold her in my arms and close her eyes as she passed. Been feeling kind of bad because she wasn't able to see our new four day old grand daughter (her new great granddaughter). But what a privilege to have such a loving, caring Mom (never a mormon). We've had many hard aches and tragedies, but to my surprize since I am out of the church with this sad time it is absolutely easier without the crazy mormon nonsense. I wondered how it would be to not have the kind of belief I had, the priesthood, blessings... That crap filled the void that I should have been thinking about other things. I believe I will see my Mom, not sure where, how or when and I don't need to know. I have no answers to that and I don't need them. I don't have to sit through a hurtful, stupid lds funeral like we did when our baby died... I don't have to do anything right now. Oh my gosh will I ever miss her being in my life and that of my children and grandchildren.

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Posted by: tawanda2011 ( )
Date: July 13, 2012 12:08AM


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Posted by: Hervey Willets ( )
Date: July 13, 2012 12:09AM


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Posted by: Tall Man, Short Hair ( )
Date: July 13, 2012 12:12AM

My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.

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Posted by: Greyfort ( )
Date: July 13, 2012 12:13AM

I'm very sorry to hear of your loss. :( *HUGS*

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Posted by: The Man in Black ( )
Date: July 13, 2012 12:14AM

Very sorry for your loss.

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Posted by: suzanne ( )
Date: July 13, 2012 12:14AM

My condolences. I am so sorry for your pain

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Posted by: Suckafoo ( )
Date: July 13, 2012 12:15AM

I hope when it's my turn I'm an old lady and have my beautiful daughters at my side. Moms are with us forever in our hearts, I even sometimes see her in the way I stand. Or the things I say. My eyes are like hers. My spirit is like hers. She is never lost to you. Time proves that out.

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Posted by: summer ( )
Date: July 13, 2012 12:17AM

I'm so sorry for your loss, Tawanda. A loving mom is a blessing.

Be very gentle with yourself over the next few days and weeks. Give yourself encouragement and love for whatever small things you are able to accomplish during the day. Your mom would want you to take good care of yourself.

Hugs to you.

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Posted by: Mnemonic ( )
Date: July 13, 2012 12:17AM

I'm sorry for your loss. How great that you could be with her at the end.

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Posted by: Helen ( )
Date: July 13, 2012 12:18AM

So sorry about your Mother's death. Grief is not an easy journey. I'm glad that you don't have to deal with this sad loss through Mormon ritual. What a nice tribute to her when you said: "what a privilege to have such a loving, caring Mom."

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Posted by: ishmael ( )
Date: July 13, 2012 12:20AM


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Posted by: Elizabeth ( )
Date: July 13, 2012 12:28AM

as she died. I was late by one hour to see my mother before she passed. It always makes me feel a little sad that I couldn't be with her but sometimes the unexpected happens quickly.

Take time to cherish those memories you shared with her and know that she will always be with you. My mom is never far from my heart and I often say a thank you to my mom when I recognize something important in my life that I learned from her. Yours mom sounds like you had that special and loving relationship too.

Take care and enjoy that new granddaughter. Life is about comings and goings, and they both bring smiles and tears in their own way.

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Posted by: THOMAS ( )
Date: August 01, 2013 09:05AM

DEAR PAULA I AM SO SORRY TO HEAR ABOUT YOUR MOTHER PASSING AWAY

YOUR A GREAT PERSON HEAR AT THE LOTTERY WHO WILL BE MISSED AS YOUR OFF AT YOUR FUNERAL AND WAKE BEST OF LUKE TO YOU. HOPE ALL GOES WELL AND HOPE THINGS TURN OUT OKAY WITH YOU.

GOD BLESS YOU

THOMAS SHEA

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Posted by: Lethbridge Reprobate ( )
Date: July 13, 2012 12:22AM

Deepest condolences on your loss. My Mom's passing is still fresh in my memory even though it was almost 16 years ago. Your grief is important so embrace it. Those feelings will be replaced over time with warm memories that will sustain you....

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Posted by: Mia ( )
Date: July 13, 2012 12:23AM

I'm so glad that you had a mother that loved you and showed it. Cherish that always. I'm so sorry you have to be without her. You will see her in yourself, and in your children. Pass her love onto your babies.

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Posted by: Levi ( )
Date: July 13, 2012 12:25AM

I'm sorry about your loss.

It's amazing to me to think about life. I think more about life than I ever did as a mormon.

Just to think about the time between when she held her newborn baby and when you held her as she passed. The life events that transpired during those years! Amazing.

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Posted by: looking in ( )
Date: July 13, 2012 12:29AM

I'm so sorry for your loss, it's never easy to lose a loved one. I'm glad you were able to be with her at the end.

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Posted by: robertb ( )
Date: July 13, 2012 12:34AM

It is wonderful to have had such a mom. I am sorry for your loss.

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Posted by: michael ( )
Date: July 13, 2012 12:38AM

May G-D comfort you as He does all mourners in Zion and Jerusalem.

My condolences to you and yours.

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Posted by: CA girl ( )
Date: July 13, 2012 01:16AM

Hugs - so sorry for your loss.

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Posted by: myselfagain ( )
Date: July 13, 2012 01:19AM

I am so sorry to hear that you lost your Mom. My heart goes out to you and I wish you peace of mind in the days ahead.

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Posted by: Sorcha ( )
Date: July 13, 2012 01:22AM

My thoughts are with you. I'm so sorry for your loss.

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Posted by: janebond462 ( )
Date: July 13, 2012 01:27AM

My condolences to you and your family. My mom died last year and I miss her SO much. Since then, I can't watch anything that has a mom dying or deals with mother/daughter relationships without bawling like a baby. Seeing Brave with DH & DD this weekend was a huge mistake. I cried through nearly half the movie.

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Posted by: rgrraymond ( )
Date: July 13, 2012 01:33AM

I am so happy for you not being in the Cult at this time. You are living in reality now and sound very healthy about your loss. Many blessings to you!

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Posted by: Surrender Dorothy ( )
Date: July 13, 2012 01:44AM

How lovely for both of you that you could be there for your mom. I'm sure it brought her much comfort. I will hold good thoughts for you and your family. ...and congratulations on your new granddaughter.

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Posted by: mysticma ( )
Date: July 13, 2012 02:08AM

My condolences to you and your family at this time. I'm sure it was a comfort for your mom, as well as you, for her to be in your arms at the end of her life. I'm sure you will be able to grieve in your own way now that the cult is out of your life, and try to remember that everyone grieves on their own time.

My mother passed in my arms, and it was an experience that I'm grateful to have shared with her.

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Posted by: honestone ( )
Date: July 13, 2012 02:14AM

My deepest sympathy to you and your family. Being there for her will be a treasured memory. Were you out of the church long before her passing? I bet she was very happy for you and grateful if she had not ever been a mormon. I hope this for my own daughter -that she sees the truth soon and saves my grandson.In time you will get the peace one needs after this kind of loss. And yes, you will see her again. My thoughts are with you.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 07/13/2012 02:17AM by honestone.

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Posted by: vulturetamer ( )
Date: July 13, 2012 02:18AM

I'm so sorry for the loss of your mama. I remember what my own mom said to me when my grandma passed away recently: No matter how old you are, or she is, that's still you're mom, and its hard to lose her.

Many thoughts coming your way, may the sweet memories be in the forefront of your mind.

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Posted by: partymxman ( )
Date: July 13, 2012 02:26AM

Our condolences. May she R.I.P.

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Posted by: Lorraine aka síóg ( )
Date: July 13, 2012 02:36AM

It was good you could be with her and hold her.

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Posted by: MexMom ( )
Date: July 13, 2012 02:59AM

and you guilded her out. There are no words....how cherished you both were to each other, hold onto that in the days ahead. Not everyone has that. My sincere sympathy is extended to you. Sending you big hugs from this MexMom.

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Posted by: certainly uncertain ( )
Date: July 13, 2012 03:18AM

So sorry for your loss. I know you will continue to find comfort in your memories of your loving Mom

.

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Posted by: Itzpapalotl ( )
Date: July 13, 2012 03:27AM


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Posted by: anagrammy ( )
Date: July 13, 2012 03:43AM

Thanks for sharing the experience you had with your Mom's passing. That's the way we all want to go, isn't it?

So sorry for your loss. I think about my mother every day and miss her - she died in 2009. No one can take your mother's place, you just go on and honor her memory, like you did with your post.

Peace,

Anagrammy

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Posted by: fidget ( )
Date: July 13, 2012 07:06AM

Sorry for your loss.

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Posted by: Taddlywog ( )
Date: July 13, 2012 07:15AM

My heart cried for your loss.

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Posted by: Liveinlou ( )
Date: July 13, 2012 07:20AM

Thank you for sharing such sweet and sincere thoughts. I think I'll go hug my mom. I'm so sorry for your loss and in awe of your sense of peace.

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Posted by: Laban's Head ( )
Date: July 13, 2012 11:32AM

Spend all the time you need to with those beautiful memories. It sounds like you had a wonderful mother and relationship.

Sending warm thoughts and hugs.

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Posted by: quebec ( )
Date: July 13, 2012 02:01PM

I am deeply sorry for your loss.
Loosing a mom is never easy.
Sending you a very heartfelt hug.

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Posted by: CL2 ( )
Date: July 13, 2012 02:09PM


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Posted by: spaghetti oh ( )
Date: July 13, 2012 03:20PM

I'm sorry that your mom has died. She sounded lovely.

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Posted by: wings ( )
Date: July 13, 2012 06:43PM

I am so very sorry you lost your Mom. My Dad died 7 weeks ago and I am surprised at the emotions I experience. He was ill a very long time, aged, and still....I grieve. Hang in there, kiddo. Hugs, wings

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Posted by: tawanda2011 ( )
Date: July 13, 2012 09:00PM

Thank you so much for your heartfelt expressions of sympathy. I am grateful to each of you and for the help this site has been to me. Our children gave tributes to their Grandmother and our one week old Grandbaby was there too. I feel at peace.

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Posted by: Johnny Canuck ( )
Date: July 13, 2012 09:27PM

So sorry but glad you were there when she passed.......relish the memories.

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Posted by: matt ( )
Date: July 13, 2012 10:07PM

tawanda2011 Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> My sweet and loving Mom just died in my arms. I
> was able to hold her in my arms and close her eyes
> as she passed. Been feeling kind of bad because
> she wasn't able to see our new four day old grand
> daughter (her new great granddaughter). But what
> a privilege to have such a loving, caring Mom
> (never a mormon). We've had many hard aches and
> tragedies, but to my surprize since I am out of
> the church with this sad time it is absolutely
> easier without the crazy mormon nonsense. I
> wondered how it would be to not have the kind of
> belief I had, the priesthood, blessings... That
> crap filled the void that I should have been
> thinking about other things. I believe I will see
> my Mom, not sure where, how or when and I don't
> need to know. I have no answers to that and I
> don't need them. I don't have to sit through a
> hurtful, stupid lds funeral like we did when our
> baby died... I don't have to do anything right
> now. Oh my gosh will I ever miss her being in my
> life and that of my children and grandchildren.

My thoughts and prayers are with you.

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Posted by: escapee ( )
Date: July 13, 2012 10:25PM

I'm so sorry. Please consider yourself hugged.

Susan

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Posted by: forestpal ( )
Date: July 14, 2012 04:12AM

Thank you for your inspirational post. I'm sorry for your loss, yet happy for the love and good memories you hold in your heart. What a beautiful relationship you had with your mother!

My best friend (non-Mormon) died last week, and my sorrow at her passing is painful--but it is balanced with love. Being free of Mormonism, I can face death with a more simple perspective, and better acceptance. The grief is pure. It is uncomplicated by feeling guilty, worrying about whether or not I'll be worthy to see the person again, or where in the hierarchy of kingdoms she will be, and all the other lies and myths piled on. Mourning is not about the church, it is about the people we loose. And it is about their life. No matter what else, we KNOW that these people will live on in our memory.

(((hugs)))

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Posted by: T-Bone ( )
Date: July 14, 2012 05:38PM

Very nice tribute to your mother.

T-Bone

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Posted by: anonymrs ( )
Date: July 14, 2012 06:05PM

So very sorry for your loss.

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Posted by: tawanda2011 ( )
Date: July 15, 2012 12:11AM

Thank you so much everyone. We were in tscc many years. I resigned a couple of years ago. We had many friends and were very active, blah, blah, blah... and busy with all our callings. Many people in the ward knew my Mom and I received one phone call from a church member expressing sympathy. These people were our friends. Everyone knew us. I was Primary President for many years. Granted I haven't attempted any contact for years but just seems so backward and thoughtless that condolences wouldn't be sent.

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Posted by: neveramo ( )
Date: July 15, 2012 02:23AM

I am so very sorry for your loss i know how you feel.

My beloved father passed away a year ago August 8th. I just went to a family reunion this past week and 99.9% of the people that were not at the funeral said nothing about my loss. Even the people I thought I was closest to. That pretty much sealed my theory of, give condolences and acknowledge a loss no matter what.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 07/15/2012 02:24AM by neveramo.

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Posted by: enoughenoch19 ( )
Date: July 15, 2012 03:20AM

It sounds like it was a beautiful experience, sad but beautiful. Treasure it. and her.

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Posted by: nonotamo ( )
Date: July 15, 2012 02:41PM

So sorry to hear of your loss, but it's good that you have so much love for your mom, and kept her company in her last hours.

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Posted by: peaches ( )
Date: July 15, 2012 02:47PM

I'm so sorry for your loss. Thank you for sharing this beautiful to your mom and your love for her. It reminds me to hold those I love a little closer every day.

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Posted by: why nut ( )
Date: August 01, 2013 09:09AM

So very sorry for your loss.

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Posted by: Bamboozled ( )
Date: August 01, 2013 09:09AM

I was with my Mom when she passed away. Even though it was the worst moment of my life I am so glad I was there with her. Its the least thing I could do for someone who was a near saint.

I feel your pain, tawanda2011 and you have my most sincere condolences.

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Posted by: Greyfort ( )
Date: August 01, 2013 09:10AM

I'm very sorry for your loss. I'm glad it was a peaceful moment for you.

Forestpal, I'm sorry you lost your friend.

*hugs* to both.

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Posted by: anagrammy ( )
Date: August 01, 2013 09:18AM

So sorry for your loss and glad for you that you could be with her at the end. We all hope to die in the arms of someone we love.

Forestpal, so sorry for the loss of your friend. I just went through that in December and I still look for my friend every time I enter the building (force of habit). It's hard to believe I will never see her again.

It does help to do something in honor of the person's memory.


Anagrammy

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Posted by: quinlansolo ( )
Date: August 01, 2013 09:19AM

When I heard my mom's passing I was 7 thousand miles away, it was so hard, painful.
Most of us understand your pain.

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Posted by: presleynfactsrock ( )
Date: August 01, 2013 09:25AM

Your mother sounds like an amazing person. What a lovely tribute you gave to her. You will get to have your Mom with you still because you will see in your child a resemblance---maybe the child's eyes or the way the child laughs. One thing you can do with your child is to be make your Mom's story and portrait part of his life and help him feel the love and gratefulness you have in your heart toward your Mom.

Give yourself time to mourn and take it one day at a time. Wishing you the best.

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Posted by: ChrisDeanna ( )
Date: August 01, 2013 09:27AM

I am so sorry for your loss of your mother. I lost mine several years ago and it was and is still not an easy road to travel.

Keep in mind that you were by your mother's side and with her until she left this realm.

My (bastard--now) ex-husband insisted that we go home when my mother was on her death bed in the hospital claiming that that it could be days until she died. She died two hours after we returned home. A nurse called me to tell me she had died! I have never forgiven myself or him for leaving her!

She died ALONE!

I am so proud of you for being there for your mother.

May you receive all the blessings you deserve!

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Posted by: shannon ( )
Date: August 01, 2013 09:30AM

I'm so sorry, sweetie. Don't forget to take care of yourself at this sad time.

;o)

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Posted by: breedumyung ( )
Date: August 01, 2013 09:45AM

My love to you and yours.

Very difficult to lose Mom...

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Posted by: shortbobgirl ( )
Date: August 01, 2013 09:46AM

Sorry for you loss. Be praying for you.

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Posted by: CL2 ( )
Date: August 01, 2013 09:48AM


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Posted by: Bite Me ( )
Date: August 01, 2013 09:53AM

So sorry for your loss. May you and your family find peace as you go through this time.

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Posted by: Laban's Head ( )
Date: August 01, 2013 09:56AM

Sending you loving thoughts and wishing you warm, loving and happy memories to surround you at this time and as you move on.

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Posted by: Levi ( )
Date: August 01, 2013 10:16AM

I hope u are doing well.

To think that when u came into this world, she cradled you in her arms and gazed into your eyes, and at this point in your lives you were able to return this is just amazing to me.

Lucky ladies.

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Posted by: CA girl ( )
Date: August 01, 2013 10:30AM

I'm sorry for your loss - your post brought tears to my eyes. It was a lovely tribute to your mom.

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Posted by: distinctly unimpressed ( )
Date: August 01, 2013 11:13AM

So sorry for your loss, but what a moving post. Take care.

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Posted by: Cali Sally ( )
Date: August 01, 2013 11:30AM

My sympathy for your loss.

I'm not looking forward to the day I lose my mother. She, too, is a warm and caring mother. She did so much for me that I cannot imagine my life without her. I treasure every day I have with her.

My heart goes out to you.

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Posted by: honestone ( )
Date: August 01, 2013 11:41AM

If your mom new about the four day old baby only through hearing you talk that is okay, and that means she could have had an understanding. I feel for you and am sending good thoughts as you get through this. Glad too that she is non mormon and you can have services that will help- not hurt- as you grieve.

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Posted by: anybody ( )
Date: August 01, 2013 11:45AM


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Posted by: drilldoc ( )
Date: August 01, 2013 05:12PM

Nice that you were there to say goodbye to her.

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Posted by: Devoted Exmo ( )
Date: August 01, 2013 05:45PM

Peace to you. You were so kind to be with your dear mother all the way to the end, enveloping her with your love.

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Posted by: Liz ( )
Date: August 01, 2013 06:31PM

Being together as the end comes is a privilage not many are lucky to have. So glad you were able to be with her.

I was not with my mother at the end. I missed being with her by just a few minutes.

Loving thoughts to you at this time.

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Posted by: steve benson ( )
Date: August 01, 2013 06:37PM


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Posted by: left4good ( )
Date: August 01, 2013 06:43PM

Man, what a profound post. It moved me to tears in a very good way.

I am sure she knew you were there to the end. You are awesome.

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Posted by: Adult of god ( )
Date: August 01, 2013 06:51PM

I hope you find comfort and not hurt so much.

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Posted by: PaintingintheWIN ( )
Date: August 01, 2013 07:07PM


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Posted by: spaghetti oh ( )
Date: August 01, 2013 07:14PM

The original post/this thread is over a year old.

I'm confused.

(No offense to tawanda2011)

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Posted by: fluhist ( )
Date: August 01, 2013 08:13PM

My condolences on your loss.

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Posted by: lurker99 ( )
Date: August 01, 2013 08:59PM

I'm sorry to hear about your loss. I just lost my Dad 5 weeks ago. Losing a parent is never easy. Here's a virtual hug for you....{{{{hug}}}}. Take care.

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