This fellow has come quite a distance, and has been through more than someone his age should have to endure.

While I am no longer a mystic, he is still undecided. After many long discussions, he is a self-proclaimed agnostic leaning towards theist, but doesn't believe anything taught about "god". It actually feels kind of good that he is blazing his own path. I'm atheist, his step-mother and most of his relatives he interacts with are Catholic, as is his school, and his mother and her side of the family are Mormon.

He has experienced so much loss and uncertainty so far, and his largest problem is judging himself too harshly.

He is the class overachiever...which they give him trophies for (highest overall GPA). I'm not bragging about this...it actually is a worry for me because of how much pressure he puts on himself. I often console him when he gets a "B" @ 92% for missing one question or something. Anyway, he is extremely sensitive kid who is a perfectionist. Any time I try to get him to tone it back, he actually sees me as an underachieving rebel.

Tonight I am beyond proud of him, and I want to explain why. Enter baseball...

Baseball is his thing. He has such natural talent. But beyond that, he LOVES to practice. Not as a "I have to do this" kind of thing, but because it relaxes him. Every free moment, he wants to either hit balls, practice fielding or just play catch.

It get irritating that I have to tell him "No" so much. Sometimes I have other pressing things that have to be done, or it's raining...etc...

Anyway, his problem in baseball isn't his talent. It's his mind...the pressure he put's on himself...

In practice, he hits balls out of the park, and hits almost every ball. There is no pressure. It's just him doing his thing.

He plays first base because he throws and catches with such natural ability.

His teammates all look up to him and tell him how he is going to hit a home-run every time he is at bat.

Well, the pressure got to him and the first game this season he struck out twice. He cried each time silently in the dug-out. After the game, I kept working with him, telling him that the only thing he needs to work on is clearing his mind. No pressure. Each pitch is a new pitch. I showed him the clip in "For love of the game" of "clearing the mechanism".

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ykV1z7NPr60

The second game he struck out once, but got to first on his second go-round off of hit that went about 2 feet, that also got him an RBI.

He didn't cry this time, and said "I'm not going to let it get to me. I made it to first, and I'm killing them getting them out."

Tonight, he struck out first go round. I went to the dug-out to encourage him to shake it off. He saw me and said "I'm not letting it get to me. I'm fine dad." So I walked away.

Next time up, he missed the first pitch. He took a few steps back, focused, and stepped back up to the plate.

He almost hit a homerun. It hit the fence, and he made the double into a triple.

After the game he said "I've got my mind under control. I know how to let it go now."

I think that he is going to be able to apply what he learns in baseball to the rest of his life. His mind was the biggest hurdle, and he is learning to bridle it like a wild horse.

I am so proud of him.



Edited 4 time(s). Last edit at 03/26/2013 02:01AM by ragingphoenix.

I just said this to Toto on her thread, too. I love when parents celebrate their kids' accomplishments. It sounds like Little Mystic is as sensitive as you are, and it's an advantage for sensitive kids to have a parent who gets them. He's a lucky boy. It's fantastic that you are helping him overcome the challenges of being sensitive by developing skills he can apply broadly in many situations for the rest of his life. Good job, Dad! Bravo, Little Mystic!

Parenting: You're doing it right. Sounds like a great kid:)

Learning to relax in a high-pressure situation is a great life-skill to learn. And it's awesome that he has a dad who sees past the immediate winning/losing and can focus on teaching him things that will really help him in the long run.

I really like your parenting style. And Little Mystic sounds like a great kid.

A film you two may enjoy, 'The Peaceful Warrior'...the true story of Olympic hopeful Dan Milman's spiritual & physical journey.

Great story!!

This story means a lot to me. Thanks, phoenix.

Thanks y'all!

I feel like I'm doing pretty good with my kids. That's one aspect of my life I am proud of. I truly believe myself to be a good dad...

WOW!
Quote:
"I've got my mind under control.
I know how to let it go now."

That is an amazing thing to be able to do. I wish I knew how to let it go too.
Thanks for sharing that with us.

You picked a great example with "clear the mechanism". I was a minor league player (also a first baseman, believe it or don't) and I learned that in Little League. Also, when at the plate, have him try visualizing what he wants to do. Make a mind game for success. That's one of the things that got me signed. I stood at the plate in a try out camp and could see myself hitting the ball to right or off the wall, and made it happen.

Good on both of you, and best of luck to LM on the diamond. You're right to be proud!

Thanks for sharing it.