"Becky" is a fifteen year old young lady who is having what appears to be severe psychological and/or emotional problems.

On the surface Becky is a perceptive, fun loving ordinary teenager. She's very tall -- not as tall as I am but much taller than average so I've tried to be a big sister to her (I had no one to help me dealing with being tall when I was growing up). Unfortunately, she has a lot of other problems to deal with. She should be in high school but is still in the eighth grade and may not pass (again) this year. She does well on assessment tests but seems to be a pre-teen emotionally. Becky wants to play with nine and ten year olds instead of teens her own age and keeps referring to herself as a "kid" who wants to do "kid things." Becky will only watch cartoons like "Finding Nemo" on Nickelodeon or shows on the Disney Channel. For almost two years Becky has been ignoring her period and will not use tampons or pads (I've seen her bleeding through her jeans and acting as if nothing was happening). She also hides her bloody underwear and clothes under furniture or in the closet. Her mother is a divorced single mum who works several part-time jobs. She tries her best but work takes precedence and Becky's father is not in the picture(they divorced when Becky was very young). She's tried to talk to Becky about the facts of life but Becky will stuff her fingers in her ears or run out of the room. Most teen girls are obsessed with their appearance but Becky will not wash or clean herself and smells and does not seem to understand what people mean when they tell her she is having problems with body odour. Becky's mother has also caught her sexting and exposing herself to men via her laptop webcam on Facebook and other social networking sites.

I don't know if Becky was abused or molested (so far the answer is no) but something is wrong with this girl. She has potential and could have a life for herself if her problems could be straightened out. If any of you have any suggestions as to what sort of specialist who could possibly help her please let me know.

She really needs to see someone, I have no idea where to start. Except maybe taking her to her primary DR and go from there. Do you think she might have been molested? My heart breaks reading this post because it is very obvious that she is hurting.

I agree, she needs a professional assessment. Something is wrong, but it's impossible to know what it is without seeing her and doing an evaluation.

She is exhibiting behaviors common to someone who was sexually abused in the past, but there is no way to no for sure unless she tells someone. She needs professional help and sooner rather than later.

be notified.

But I would try to find out if the mother is already on this.

She sounds like one of my OT patients. I agree, an evalution needs to be done.

It seems to me Becky is mentally impaired. I don't know what's up with Becky's mom. It sounds like she is aware and is trying her best, but possibly has zero help and resources to work with, not enough money to pay for programming or counseling or having to take time off work to drive across town, which completely eats up half the day, and you still have to pay the bills.

The school has probably already been in touch with Becky's mom, but they need permission to run any tests and evaluations. It's possible the school has done nothing and Becky's mom needs to be persistent about setting up an Individualized Education Program (IEP) for her child. She will probably need to take her child to a doctor and psychiatrist/psychologist for documentation. Do they have insurance? If she can get at IEP in place, the child will get some extra support as far as school is concerned and some social support as well. If Becky's mom is not granting permission for evaluation, I'm not sure the school can do anything.

Becky needs some help. I'm wondering if Becky's mom can afford any special programs that could help the child or knows where to go or what to do.

Start with the school and set up an IEP. The school probably has some resources to assist, it's just hard if you can't afford these programs.

A psychologist would be useful here.

Becky's mom should go to Social Security/Department of Economic Security and see if the child can qualify for some benefits and financial assistance.

Are you in the US or elsewhere?

Becky lives in the SW USA. Her mom says the psychologists think she might be austistic but say it's rare in girls and they aren't sure what exactly is wrong with her. Becky's father left years ago when she was little and has spent time in prison. Becky hates her father and says there was physical abuse but denies sexual abuse. I think that she was but she won't say for sure.

Autism might be more prevalent in boys but certainly girls can have it.

A number of years ago I did a long-term temp assignment at a residential school that served kids with emotional/behavioral issues. That's where I first heard of Asperger's. There were many girls among the students so her mom shouldn't discount autism spectrum disorder as a possibility.

Becky is definitely developmentally delayed. I agree with the possible suspicion of an autism spectrum disorder (which is *not* caused by sexual abuse, btw). She needs one-on-one training in the activities of daily living - particularly hygeine.

In order to access that kind of therapy, she will need a full psycho-social evaluation . . . either through the school system, private insurance or Medicaid. Start with a visit to her primary doctor. The girl would be lucky if she already had state-funded medicaid, as their system for providing medical intervention and psychological services for children/adolescents is already in place (and is quite extensive).

Good luck.

;o)

P.S. The posters who suggest Becky was sexually abused may be right, but my thought is that she would be developmentally delayed anyway regardless of the abuse. Of course, both issues need to be addressed.

You said she lives in the SW..I know that AZ has programs, they are very good and free to those that qualify..plus alot of support too. Calif does as well. The school should have already provided these referrals though.

My first stop for Becky would be the school counselor. I think that Becky needs a thorough evaluation. She doesn't need a "maybe" for autism. She needs someone who will evaluate and diagnose her, and start treatment. While this can begin with a school counselor, my choice would be using the resources of a local university-affiliated teaching hospital.

Mom will need to sign off on any of that.

Hygiene issues are not unusual with adolescents, but such issues need to be addressed.

She should have a complete assessment with a pediatric neurologist. When I worked for one in Utah (Park City), we had people come from all over the country to have their child walk out with not only an evaluation but ten pages of things to do immediately to help the situation.

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