I want to have sex with my Telestial Kingdom bound wife in the next life. It is one of the few things I like about Mormonism as I understand it. In a different thread I was introduced to the idea of Smoothies but as of yet I don't have any doctrinal evidence of the idea. I don't remember reading that in the LDS canon...any help would be nice.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 05/28/2013 06:59PM by seneca.

we don't need no stinkin' doctrinal evidence.

said two incredibly racist caricatures from some John Huston movie with Tim Holt.

We will be resurrected in our most perfect form. Being a smoothie does not fit the Mormon definition of the resurrection.

Don't you think in our most perfect form we would be a fully functional intersex with no need of another for reproduction? There will be no recessive genes in a perfected body.

That just popped in my head.

Joseph Fielding Smith:

"In both of these kingdoms [i.e., the terrestrial and telestial] there will be changes in the bodies and limitations. They will not have the power of increase, neither the power or nature to live as husbands and wives, for this will be denied them and they cannot increase. Those who receive the exaltation in the celestial kingdom will have the “continuation of the seeds forever.” They will live in the family relationship. In the terrestrial and in the telestial kingdoms there will be no marriage. Those who enter there will remain “separately and singly” forever. Some of the functions in the celestial body will not appear in the terrestrial body, neither in the telestial body, and the power of procreation will be removed. I take it that men and women will, in these kingdoms, be just what the so-called Christian world expects us all to be – neither man nor woman, merely immortal beings having received the resurrection. (Doctrines of Salvation. vol. 2, pg. 287-288.)"

"In the resurrection there will be different kinds of bodies; they will not all be alike. The body a man receives will determine his place hereafter. There will be celestial bodies, terrestrial bodies, and telestial bodies, and these bodies will differ as distinctly as do bodies here. … Some will gain celestial bodies with all the powers of exaltation and eternal increase. These bodies will shine like the sun as our Savior's does…. Those who enter the terrestrial kingdom will have terrestrial bodies, and they will not shine like the sun, but they will be more glorious than the bodies of those who receive the telestial glory. (Doctrines of Salvation, 2:286-287)"

D&C 132:17,

17 For these angels did not abide my law; therefore, they cannot be enlarged [*snicker*], but remain separately and singly, without exaltation, in their saved condition, to all eternity; and from henceforth are not gods, but are angels of God forever and ever.

Number 1 sounds really good to me. I think I would like being singly just me with friends of course but free to roam around.

Looks like smoothies it is.

I'm still baffled as to how it is that procreating throughout eternity is desirable , let alone the truth . The same way I don't desire the company of these holier than thou hypocrites here on Earth , I damn sure don't want to share my space in eternity either . They need to explain how any one of my mortal family members will EVER be anything but my family . All the power in the universe cannot alter what is truth . Anyone speculating on form and function of the human in the next incarnation is merely guessing .

Because deep down Mormonism is just a sex cult.

No one, and I mean absolutely no one knows ANYTHING about what happens to our conciousness or "soul" after we die. Sex maniac early Mormon leaders (JS in particular) would, of course, fabricate a threat of eternal celibacy and dicklessness for the less valiant. At least you can give them credit for making up such a complex mythology.

Women may welcome it, though.. eternal procreation would seem to dictate eternal menstruation, accompanied by celestial cramps and bloating.

My TBM husband, who fancies himself a "deep doctrine expert", says that there will be no sex outside of the highest place in the CK and that everyone else will be what HE calls "donkeys" and you call "smoothies".

I think this is all total nonsense. I believe in an afterlife, but I don't know what it will be like and neither do the members of a stupid waste of time cult/corporation.

Cracks me up...Mormon deep doctrine is who gets laid in heaven. And to think I believed (fell for) this sh!t.

Tk...this is all you bro.

Nothing definitive...great! I can keep believing what I want, I love flexible Mormon Doctrine. Telestial Kingdom here I come!

JFS was trumped by modern profits on this one:

"Gender is an essential characteristic of individual premortal, mortal, and eternal identity and purpose."
~Family proclamation

Gender is eternal in mormonism....thus "smoothies" is not possible. Throw that in the next tbms fave who tries to leverage your genitals for faith.