We've been wondering how the church was going to keep all those barely-legal boys out of trouble and doing missionary work when they've never been away from home before. If you thought that the current crop of missionaries is immature and prone to getting into trouble, imagine what's going to happen with these 18-year-olds.

But now we know the church's plan: they're going to stick them in chapels, doing cyber missionary work and giving the occasional tour -- and monitored all the time. The ward is now supposed to take point on missionary work, with members present at all discussions -- again, making sure the missionaries are properly chaperoned.

Thank you, PS&R Monson, for this wonderful wonderful plan that is going to backfire horribly and actually increase the church's already-soaring rate of apostasy. Want to know why it's going to backfire? I am happy to tell you because it's too late to change.

The one thing that kept so many men in the church was their mission experience. Two years of relatively independent life, with a constant companion, dedicated to church work with the missionaries themselves out on the streets and making their own plans: that's a good way to make someone loyal to a cause. As many have said before, the real goal of a mission is not to make converts for the church, but to convert the missionary. And it does a pretty good job: without the mission experience, the church would have decayed away to nothing by now.

But under this new plan, how are the missionaries going to be converted? If they're sitting in a chapel trying to proselytize on Facebook or giving tours to homeless people who wander by, how are they going to change? If local members accompany them on all their discussions, what are they going to be other than body-temperature substitutes for YouTube? Where is the planning? Where is the decision making? Where is the in-your-face opposition? Without those, the real question becomes, "Where is the by-in for the missionaries?" If they are monitored and chaperoned and shepherded through their mission experience, how will their hearts and minds be molded into the true belief needed for them to support the church for the rest of their lives?

Answer: It's not going to happen. I grant that the process didn't work very well before, but the church was probably holding onto at least 50% of the RMs. Now that percentage will plummet. The traditional missionary experience was one of the last bulwarks against a much greater outflow of youth than we are currently seeing. With that bulwark torn down and replaced with something little different than seminary or a youth conference, the only thing holding them in will be early marriage, and fewer will be going for that because they won't actually be converted to the church.

A better, though more drastic, plan would be to have both men and women go on traditional missions at 20 or 21, but only as married couples. That would encourage them to marry young, and would allow husband and wife to bond with each other and the church at the same time. You'd probably see stronger marriages and more connection to the church, plus a young married couple would probably get a better reception with non-members than two snotty and immature boys.

The big down-side of the above is that it looks extremely cult-like and would kill convert baptisms and any chance the church has of appearing mainstream and "normal". But it might give the church a fighting chance at retaining the core of its youth. Pluses and minuses.

As always, RfM will be here to tell the truth and provide emotional and spiritual first-aid to the wounded who are pouring out of the church. What was once a trickle, and is now a steady stream is about to turn into a powerful and noisy waterfall. All because the church can't do strategy to (literally) save its life.

CZ

That's what I just told DW. Well, now we know where they're putting all those new mishies. In a chapel all day being monitored. I don't think this will help mental health any.

Old missys Sitting in front fo a computer all day;Only to take brakes to give tours & clean bathrooms. Doesnt strick me as a healthy way to build character or groom social skills! As much as the little angle-bitter irrate me. I could see the benefit to the mental developement of them! They learned grooming, foriegn languages. and skill in rejection.(something life is full of). Sitting in steril chaples waiting for an occational prospect, I think the bordom will drive them batty! The mind cant stand a vacuum

Talk about the most boring 3 minute tour in the world. These are Mormon cookie-cutter ward houses built with 2x4s and sheetrock. Limited amount of mass produced corporate art, cheap dirty furniture in the foyer and aboslutely nothing impressive in the chappel.

National cathedral....not
St. Pauls....not
Notre Dame....not
St. Peters....certainly not

No stained glass, no statuary, no crypts, no vaulted ceilings, no organs, no painted ceilings, no flying butresses.

But they do have stained office carpet, industrial wall paper, cheap wood paneling, office furniture, stacked folding chairs, empty classrooms, a gym with no equipment, bishops office, bathroom and janitorial closet. Wow what a tour.....sign me up. Not!

Hee Hee! Spot on...

I suppose they feel that if the looky-loos just get a glimpse of the painting of John baptising Jesus, that their hearts will be sold, and they will waste no time jumping in feet first. :)

Great points. Actually, your "better plan" reflects what a lot of Christian missionaries are like...young couples...and in it for years.

IDEA in theory. Yes they would share exsperiances and bond w/the church. Theres Just one little problem....About 8lbs. 7oz. of sceaming responsiblity. Theyd have to deal w/morning sickness & swellen ankles for tracting. Babies or babysitters for time during discussions. Rememmber you gotta multiply & replunish the earth. I figure couple could do it a year. But theyd have to figure health care & prego costs for young couples. An expense they only wouldnt want.

Your strategies are far superior, concrete zipper. Also, I like the idea of making the Mormon missions more like the peace corps.

I'll bet that LDS, Inc. has a special reciprocity deal with Apple, for the iphones and ipads. Even so, they will charge the members full price for the equipment and the security software (which will block all other sites except for the Mormon ones.)

Gone are the days when members had to contribute paper-back BOM's with their photo and testimony inside. Now it will be i-pads and i-pods = MORMONey! "We're having a special i-pad drive this month!"

(D'ya suppose TSCC will actually light, heat, and AC the chapels for these missionaries? We never had heat when we practiced the organ or choir.) "We're packing boxes of parkas, blankets, hats and gloves for the missionaries this winter!"

Going to be a lot of basketball practice IMO with all those
youngsters in chapels

What makes the church think people will even come to see their church. I sure no one dose now. Why should it change?

The thing the wrecked my mission for me was all the time wasted in pointless, fruitless work. Just having to fill all those empty afternoons, week after week was brutal and mentally exhausting. It allowed my mind to wander.

If if were up to me, I would make sure every missionary had something useful and meaningful to do every day. Even if it was painting a member's house.

I doubt a dozen people in the modern history of the church have ever dropped by to visit a McChapel. And I have no idea what a social networking facebook missionary does, and I don't think the church does either. And if the Ward mission leader and EQP knew of anyone that could refer to the missionaries, they would have already.

Historic? Ha. This is a whole lotta nothing.

So each ward is going to have one of those flashing neon signs that says "open" ?

I think this is a result of the fact that Monson isn't as good of a strategic leader and PR guy as Hinckley, and he isn't as smart. Hinckley spent decades in church PR work and was a clever guy in building up his image and the image of the church. The church may simply no longer have enough leadership ability to survive. In this broadcast, the leaders seemed to be looking to the members with desperation in their eyes, saying "Please fix this because we don't know how!" They're hoping the members will somehow find a way to make it work, because it's the members who really believe in the church anyway and are willing to sacrifice so much for it. That's why there was so much vagueness in the talks. They don't have the answers and they're hoping the members do.

So they're putting the missionaries under the care of the members and in an available place at the chapels and hoping it all works out. But they don't know how to have a hands-off leadership approach, and anything creative the members try will probably be squelched by the leadership. Such as, if members try to hold a missionary event at the chapel and invite investigators, SLC will probably cite policy of some kind and tell them they can't do it. This will discourage the members from anything but minimum effort and ruin the whole new member missionary program.

The church is in free fall... This is a desperate attempt not only to control and hold onto the youth but to possibly convert, which is a stretch. Lets face it-come in and tour the building ?? Come on! Mormons have the most bland uninspired churches I have ever seen.... And folks I've seen a lot of churches in my day.

Prediction: this will fail miserably, nothing left but the Autopsy.

Gawd, this is funny. Come in and tour an LDS chapel!!!! Woot!

This is so funny...