I posted this in a fb group but I'm so frustrated right now but don't want to bother everyone and they are busy. So I figured I could bother you all. :)

*Not usually one to swear or get angry but it's warranted today. I am so fucking tired of bending over backwards for people and organizations (my work, the church) and not having it reciprocated. There is no loyalty, no flexibility, nothing left to show for the sacrifice and effort you put in. You'd think I'd learn that by now. But no. I try to help people out as much as I can, not expecting anything, but hoping they would return the favor if needed. And then nothing. I am not a cutthroat person. I'm not one to put the "bottom line" above all else. But apparently that's what makes the world go round. I don't like these life lessons. I don't want to surround myself with these people but I'm stuck for right now.

Why don't they care about helping the individual? Why don't they care about making things better for everyone? When did it turn into this?

Frustrated! I'm sorry that you're going through these things. I've felt the same things with my past job and church. What is happening with church? If you care to vent.

I love making the lives of others better. In fact, I just became a caregiver which pays me to do this. However...

Giving myself permission to say "no" made my life much, much, MUCH better. I only help when I feel physically, mentally and emotionally capable of doing so in a healthy way. Otherwise, I burn and go crazy.

The only exception to this rule of mine is my grandmother. She's almost 98 years old and living on borrowed time. No matter how tired or stressed I am I will do whatever she asks of me because I love her and want her remaining days to be as perfect as humanly possible.

Give yourself permission to say no. Practice it and use it. Be prepared to have to practice it some more. Even after I've mastered it I will still sometimes find myself falling into the old habit of people-pleasing.

yes that's what it is. I'm a people pleaser. I try to do as much as I possibly can for everyone, to my own detriment. And then when I get shafted in the end it really hurts.

I am a caregiver of sorts too. I work in the medical profession helping sick people. They are some of the most ungrateful people on the planet! I still push through it and do the job. But the management is what is starting to get to me. It's never enough and they never reciprocate by cutting you a break. It has so many parallels to church leaders.

Trying to do the right thing,out of the goodness of my heart because of who I am etc. but apparently other people/organizations don't hold themselves to that same standard--and are perfectly fine putting people last. After all, money is king. Money makes the world go round. I've never been motivated by money. I'm not inspired by money. I don't care about making a billion dollar corporation more money. I care about people and causes. I thought I was in the right field but maybe not.

The church is the same lifesucking force as always. They take and take and never give back, never build you up. Only being concerned about how you can help them.

I'm more frustrated with my work--run withe the Mormon model in mind. Push people as hard as you can, make them jump through your hoops and then when they need something you turn around and say, I'm sorry I can't help you with that.

You are their mark.
They are the beast.
Thus making you the mark of the beast.

This world was built on the backs of suckers and dupes.

WAKE UP!

so diablo are you saying those who care about helping people are suckers and dupes? That is a really shitty way to view people.