I had a pulmonary embolism (blood clot to the lung) and thought I was going to die. I would have died if the clot had broken off all at once but it did it in three parts in roughly twelve hour increments.

I was walking in my upstairs hallway to one afternoon in July and then everything started going black and I slid to the floor and was on my hands and knees gasping for breath. Every gasp felt like half a lungful of air.

I live by myself and realized I needed to get outside immediately since it would take my family a while to find me if I was dead ….and it was a hot July. I grabbed my purse and got outside. I didn’t see any neighbors (I lived in a townhouse community, it was a Saturday) and there were not many cars in the parking lot, so I drove gasping for air to the walk-in clinic that was about two miles away. They then sent me by ambulance to the emergency room. The clinic backed up to the firehouse so it didn’t take them long.

My first thought was that I didn’t want to leave a mess for my family to find. Then I was intent on getting to a place for help. What I didn’t know is that there is not one thing they can do for a pulmonary embolism. A blood clot blocks the flow of blood to the lungs. It is not like having your throat swell up and they can put a tube into your lungs. Your lungs just don’t work. However I can say it must be a fast death because I nearly blacked out and then it would have been all over. I didn’t really think about much else because I was concentrating on gasping for air and not passing out.

When I got to the clinic I said “I (gasp gasp) can’t (gasp gasp) breath (gasp gasp) I (gasp gasp) need (gasp gasp) oxy (gasp gasp) gen (gasp gasp)”. The guy looked at me and said “Do you have your insurance card?” He was unclear on the concept of “emergency”. A nurse saw me and took me back immediately and gave me oxygen.

I told them I had a blood clot in my arm but they decided that I was having a panic attack because normally blood clots in the arm don’t detach. Blood clots in the legs are what normally cause pulmonary embolisms. Well, after many months of doctors and tests it turned out that I have a very rare clotting deficiency that causes all blood clots to detach. Also when they looked a week after the blood clot was diagnosed it was completely gone. All gone into my lungs. It was then that I learned how deficient most doctors are. They can only diagnose what they know. And what they know is what they regularly see. If they don’t regularly see it then it does not exist. I finally got the answers by working with a doctor who was also a researcher. Most of the doctors I saw were useless. These were top doctors at Georgetown University Hospital and Johns Hopkins.

I have never nearly died--but I type for doctors every day and have for 24 years. I agree with your conclusions about doctors.

And sorry about your experience!



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 01/28/2011 02:56PM by cl2.

I've been very near death. Close enough that family members were hoping for Jesus and angels stories. The nurse told my sister that some people are near death, and some are dying. Your brother is dying.

No bright lights, no tunnels, no nothing at all. Zip, nadda.

When I was conscious enough to think, I wanted to live pretty bad, and prayed to live a bunch. For a while, I was living minute to minute, and I was praying for another minute.

I'm not so into life now, but if I were dying again, I might start wanting it worse again. I'm relaxed enough about death to have a DNR (Do not resuscitate).

I've had a gun pointed in my face, and the person saying that they were going to kill me. That split second life flash before your eyes thing happened. You can think a lot of thoughts in a very short time in those situations.

all I wanted was either for it to be over immediately, or for my husband to be there holding my hand in the end so that I could say goodbye and he would know I loved him. It's all I could think about. When it was all over I realized that I wasn't as reconciled to death as I had thought, and I realized that my marriage, flaws and all, has been the most important anything in my life. I love that man. He is good to me. I hope I can be as good to him.

...I was unconscious, so I didn't know.

There were times I was not really that close to death when I thought, "Boy, that would be a stupid way for me to die."

There was a period when I worried about dying with a messy house or porn on my computer or something else embarrassing. But then I realized that since I don't think there's anything after death I wouldn't be around to be embarrassed.

When I go, I just want it to be quick. None of this slow stuff where I'm in pain and/or incontinent and/or out of my mind and/or on life support. I hope I will have found my own Kavorkian before it gets to that state of things.

Well, a little over six years ago I was diagnosed with Stage 4 cancer and told I had a 5% chance of survival. One of the oncologists said, "If it has spread, your are toast!" Well, it had spread.

That is when I adopted my new mantra, "Drink more beer." the DW and I set up a bucket list, and we traveled all over Mexico, Central America and the Caribbean in between treatments and all. We spent a lot of money, drank much libation and enjoyed ourselves immensely. I thought regularly of dieing, but I tried to think more about living. I had a great life insurance policy and the DW could pay everything off and still have a solid amount of cash when I had to stop drinking beer.

Alas, I didn't die and now we are working at paying all the bills off. Life is too short to not enjoy it, so drink more beer!

Well - I got shot at plenty while in Afghanistan, but at the time I was more worried about finding cover and returning fire than I was thinking about dying.
On one occasion in particular, I felt strangely calm and peaceful, as if I was somehow protected, even though I saw small arms fire and an RPG round hit not too far away from me. I already knew Mormonism was fake and had pretty much given up on religion, but I felt like God or some higher power was protecting me so that I could come back home to my daughter.
It doesn't make a lot of sense logically, but I kind of feel like that love between me and my daughter is what kept me alive.

My experience is slightly similar to yours, Raven.

After my daughter was born, I tripped while carrying her, and injured my shoulder and ribs trying to protect her. I felt the pain start to travel around, first to the other shoulder, and then down into my hip. All we had was the crappy student health insurance, so I didn't want to go to a doctor, even though DH told me I was starting to cry in my sleep.

I'm not a very vocal person when I'm in pain, but one morning I woke up and screamed the moment I tried to stand up. Student health center couldn't tell us anything, other then that my right leg was significantly larger then the other, and starting to turn purple.

I got sent to Utah Valley hospital, and it turned out that I had a blood clot that started at my knee, and they couldn't find the other end on the ultrasound. My options were to do blood thinners, and pray that it didn't start visiting my brain, lungs, and heart, or have a risky surgery that could leave me with a useless, or highly damaged leg.

Opted for surgery, and they did it on the table for open heart surgery. I remember the whole thing, because they kept me awake and talking, to make sure it wasn't affecting my responses. They put a little metal strainer in my neck, then rolled me over and went into the vein to break it up. Radioactive dye in my veins, surgeons all in lead vests...the works.

Because of the lousy student insurance, no tests were run...only found out when I had my second that I have a clotting disorder. Luckily, though, I survived the experience with no major damage. To this day I can't stand for too long, or else I get a sharp pain up the back of my leg, but that's small potatoes compared to what they said would happen.

Wymount ward treated us like plague zombies...no help given, at all. Some wouldn't even talk to us, because we weren't regularly attending. Bishop threatened to pull our ecclesiastical endorsement.

In the middle of of it, though, all I was worried about was leaving my husband who had just lost his job and was a full-time student trying to care for a 3 month old baby. The two of them were why I was begging to be ok.

the ones where I felt my consciousness separating from my body, and everything going black before losing consciousness were terrifying. It only happened a few times so I did not understand it was not real. Now I usually notice SPS's long before they progress to that point. Doctors were idiots, and if they had been doing their jobs would have diagnosed me much sooner. The problem was not that they did not have the knowledge to diagnose, but they did not listen, and simply look at the symptoms logically - until I had a serious head injury.

Glad everyone here is ok! I love the drink more beer comment. Yes, I died and came back. I was 10 and I fell off a cliff hiking. I don't remember sh*t. So no lights, no seeing my past life, nothing. I remember falling and I remember waking up in the hospital in a hell of a lot of pain. So everything I know in between is hearsay from my parents. According to them my dad's priesthood blessing made them know I would be okay and after another blessing many of my injuries magically disappeared.

Well I can accept that my parents were willing the universe to help me out, but then again the body is pretty amazing at healing itself too. My recovery was rough. But the only lasting damage is the scars on my knees, arm, and chin. So I got pretty lucky.

I was canoeing in Missouri about 28 years ago with an inexperienced partner when we flipped over and I became entangled in the underwater branches and vines. I kicked and kicked, but couldn't get loose. My legs were completely imprisoned. The more I kicked, the more bruises I inflicted.

My life did not pass before my eyes. Instead, I visualized what the St. Louis Post-Dispatch story would look like: "Local Attorney Drowns in Current River." Seriously, I SAW the headline.

My only was thought was how upset my family would be. That I might die didn't really bother me, as I'm a Christian (not a Mormon) and I know God has prepared a place for me in his eternal kingdom. Death, where's your sting? Grave, where's your victory?

Somehow, I kicked free and then saw that my canoeing partner - a weak swimmer - was foundering. I grabbed her and dragged her to shore. Our friends, who had been ahead of us, saw our empty canoe float by and thought we were kaput.

But we survived! I lost my glasses and my favorite ball cap, but here I am.

Highland Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> I was canoeing in Missouri about 28 years ago with
> an inexperienced partner when we flipped over and
> I became entangled in the underwater branches and
> vines. I kicked and kicked, but couldn't get
> loose. My legs were completely imprisoned. The
> more I kicked, the more bruises I inflicted.
>
> My life did not pass before my eyes. Instead, I
> visualized what the St. Louis Post-Dispatch story
> would look like: "Local Attorney Drowns in
> Current River." Seriously, I SAW the headline.
>
> My only was thought was how upset my family would
> be. That I might die didn't really bother me, as
> I'm a Christian (not a Mormon) and I know God has
> prepared a place for me in his eternal kingdom.
> Death, where's your sting? Grave, where's your
> victory?
>
> Somehow, I kicked free and then saw that my
> canoeing partner - a weak swimmer - was
> foundering. I grabbed her and dragged her to
> shore. Our friends, who had been ahead of us, saw
> our empty canoe float by and thought we were
> kaput.
>
> But we survived! I lost my glasses and my
> favorite ball cap, but here I am.

My nephew was driving my small car and came very close to an accident. A large truck ran a light and was coming straight at him. He was sure he was going to be killed and was surprised at how calm he was. His only thought was who would pick up his daughter at daycare and how would his ex know that he wouldn't be able to do it-being dead and all. Fortunately, he managed to get out of the way and the truck missed by about an inch.

I don't think I was really near death, but in 2003 I had some sort of episode where I couldn't breathe for several minutes. I was conscious the whole time and the only thing I could think was that Mr. BestBBQ didn't know where I was and I was going to die surrounded by strangers. I wrote about it here the next day and Fly, who used to be a regular, consulted with Dr. Fly who thought I might have had a respiratory spasm. The only thing I know for sure is that I never want to experience that kind of panic/terror ever again.

My sister coded following surgery. She remembers my mom's twin sisters who died at birth, years before she was born coming to her. Not sure whther it was a dream or not. When we were children, those dead babies and their graves made a big impression on us.

When I was 12, I died. The doctor gave me an antibiotic injection for an infection, and it sent me into full respiratory arrest. My heart stopped, and I had to be resusitated.

While this was going on, I was in a place of fields and a river nearby, with forest ahead of me. I started going toward the forest but after just a few steps I saw myself coming out of the forest toward me. The other me told me to turn around and go back, because it wasn't time for us to be together again yet. Yes, he said "again".

So...the next thing I knew, I was back in the hospital. Everything turned out fine for me.

Five years later, I learned that I had had an identical twin brother who lived only a few minutes after birth. I guess we had been together before, after all.