Mine was very awkward, I think I was 10 when my parents took just me out on a date to get dinner and an ice cream. To be fair, I was their first child, so they might have improved with my other siblings. But the awkward part was that they sat in the front of the car and didn't face me the whole time they talked about it. That was really the only time I was given to ask questions. I barely understood that point "A" went into slot "B", I didn't really know what to ask. They didn't even explain that it was pleasurable in any way. Because it was first approached this way I never felt comfortable with talking with them about it and I feel was left adrift during my teenage years.

What was yours like? Did they ever talk to you about it?

I learned everything in high school. Parents just told me not to do it until I was married.

My wife the same. Her parents gave her a christian marriage and sex book. It was pretty good, but that was the most my wife's parents ever talked about it.

I got the talk, such as it was, when I was very young, like 6 or so. It was all about how my body was going to change in preparation for becoming a mother, and the baby gets there by a sacred act on the wedding night. Mom was comfortable enough giving these facts with the help of a kids book, but yeah, pleasure certainly didn't factor into the discussion.

Since that was the extent of the birds and the bees talk I got, I was really afraid that near my wedding she would try to "clear a few things up for me".
Thankfully, she did not.

Communication has always sucked between us, she reads things into what I say that I do not mean, and says things to me with lots of hidden meaning.
Me, I got confused early on about how to communicate, so I don't load up on subtle messages or play her games at all. I say what I mean, and that blows some peoples' minds.

My TBM parents never bothered to talk about it until I was on my way to the temple to get married, age 26.

"I know how it works, thanks."

That's hysterical!

When our son was about 10, my husband and I decided it was time for the birds and bees discussion. So I started saying we wanted to talk about where babies came from. He stood up and said he was too young for that discussion and went outside. :)



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 08/22/2013 06:23PM by iris.

Never got one. Neither did my siblings. The information I got came from friends. I became sexually active in junior high, pregnant at 16, and "had" to get married.

My parents were Catholic but weren't too prudish. Nevertheless sex talk was difficult for them.

My mom took me aside when I was 11 and traumatized me by revealing the facts about menstruation and at the same time, explaining that she was legally blind (totally blind in one eye, with glaucoma in the other).

I had no idea she was blind and starting crying out loud. I adored my mother and was horrified that she suffered so...

I guess she figured that it was easier to unload both difficult facts of life at the same time ... but it was not such a good idea.

I just kept bawling and wailing the words, "I don't believe you mama, I don't believe you!!!!

I'll let you know when my parents finally get around to it. I'm almost 30, so don't hold your breath.

What's funny is that they aren't particularly prudish. They're not afraid of sex topics. My mom makes "that's what she said" jokes all the time. They just never gave me any kind of talk to explain the basic mechanics or emotions or repercussions or anything about sex.

No, instead I got that talk from my friend Melissa when I was 6. She showed me with her Barbies.

Too funny. With my wife pregnant for our third kid, my dad said, "you know what's causing that, right?" My parents, I guess, figured we'd learn it where most kids do...in the gutter!

My parents never had the talk with me; I think they assumed my older sister and her friends had filled me in.

I do clearly remember in 5th grade there was a special day set aside where all of us boys got to go outside and play softball or basket ball while the girls stayed inside and had a lecture and a film called something like "Your Changing Body" (a cute girl I had a crush on named Kaylynn devulged this to me although they were sworn to secrecy. My crush on Kaylynn was later ruined when my mom informed me that do to our polygamous ancestors Kaylynn was actually a cousin.) At any rate while we boys were outside trying to figure out what was going on, Steve H. announced ... oh they are watching a movie about "menstration" ugh we were so grossed out ...of course we were not supposed to know what any of it was about anyway.

I was simply told that girls have little eggs inside of them and that I'm supposed to "fertilize" one for it to develop into a baby. I was thoroughly confused, because to me fertilizer was just some stuff that we poured on our lawn to help it grow. So I just take one of her eggs and pour lawn fertilizer on it? Okay...

Something about turning on the headlights because the car was going into the garage or something like that...



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 08/22/2013 07:31PM by hangar18.

The early sex talk I remember most was the famous Little Factory speech which I heard over live sideband radio (no satellite images in those days) sitting next to my grandpa at age 11 and 51 weeks. It was traumatic because, well, my little factory had been tampered with.

As I think about it, my sex talks all got handed off to my grandpa. I remember that I got a private viewing of one of the standard sex ed filmstrips of the day at my grandparent's house. Everyone in my family taught public school so we had access to the projectors and filmstrips whenever we wanted,

It was all very biology-based, abstinence oriented, heteronormative... certainly not what I would do for my own kids if I had any.

I didn't grow up in the church. Mom is Lutheran and dad is Catholic. Both were very open and I had the talk when I was probably 8-9.

In 4th grade, we had sex ed (was schooled in Germany). I remember the teachers had to have the permission of the parents first. Two of the Italian kids weren't allowed to participate. I think their parents were very strict Catholic.

We laughed and giggled in class but in all, it was a good experience.

I'm glad I had open minded parents and grew up in Europe.

Non-Mormon here...I got the talk when I was 9. But all my mom said was "Someday a boy will try something but don't do it. You're not that kind of a girl!" That was her whole talk. Then when I was in 5th grade all the girls in class went to the auditorium to see some menstruation movie made by the Kotex company. The movie had lots of diagrams and was pretty confusing.

I never got the talk until the day before my wedding. Even then, they did not explain much, just to use condoms and not to have sex if I don't want to.

My parents took the jam your fingers in your ears and go "LALALALALALALALALA" approach whenever I had questions. I went to school after Reagan left office, so sex ed was abstinence-based and riddled with scare tactics, dangerous misinformation, and heteronomative, like Inverso, except legitimate biology played no part.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 08/22/2013 10:57PM by tapirsaddle.

Non-existant. I was a very sheltered kid, and I had to find out about the mechanics of sex from one of my good friends in HIGH SCHOOL! its embarrassing.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 08/22/2013 10:51PM by queenb.

my dad told me about vd's. I can't remember if I asked or if he just volunteered the info. I was 13 or 14?

We got info at school, I think in gr. 5 or 6 and then in gr. 7&8 gym classes.

My mom, who was a nurse, didn't tell me anything, except to assume I got the info at school and at church.

I scoffed a sex pamphlet from their little Mormon book store in our family room (or what should have been the family room), a few weeks before my marriage, read it and was totally disgusted. Did NOt discuss this with my parents as I figured by then it was none of their business.

Growing up on the ranch I learned the tab A in slot B part real early.

I know i was near 8 when I figured out what was going on.

We went to Ogden one Sunday for some family function. I was the "visitor" in a Sunday school class. The teacher gave a lesson on the Church being like a bee hive. She wanted us all to promise to get baptized and be good worker bees.

Well I didn't raise my hand. She said don't you want to be a good worker bee? I said no I want to be the drone.

So this city gal asks why. I said "All I'd have to do all day is have sex with the queen and eat honey."

I soon found myself banished to the hall while she did damage control.

OMgosh! I love this story. Had a good laugh with my coffee this morning. Thanks for posting the bee story. LOL.

I guess they got wind from their friends or somewhere that my never-mo friends had access to some porn. This was true. They said they knew from the spirit, but I think was either word of mouth or with young teen boys a lucky guess.

Well it was a stern talk about the dangers of sex related stuff, but not terribly specific or useful. They explained that Satan had used drugs to destroy their generation (boomers), and was using sex to destroy ours. They also gave me the obligatory Ted Bundy warning, because of course everyone who sees pictures of nude females becomes a serial killer--duh!

It was weird and very uncomfortable.

Looking back, I sometimes wonder if my parents' belief in Satan was stronger than their belief in God. Satan, Satan everywhere. Satan, Satan beware. It seemed that avoiding Satan was more important than finding God.

My mother was nevermo and never had any problem talking about sex. There were all kinds of Playboy and Hustler magazines in the house (thanks to my stepdad) so I read those starting at a young age. That and friends were my sex education. She never gave me "the talk" though. When I was 16 she asked me if I needed to go on birth control. That was it.

My TBM stepmother came home from work one day and handed me a pamphlet she'd gotten from her sister who was a nurse at the time. "read this" she said and left the room. I never read it. By that time I had a pretty good idea.

I never got a sex talk of any kind from my parents. I learned about it from my best friends older sister. It freaked me out that my parents did that. My parents didn't even tell me to wait until I was married. They left it up to the church to give me the chewed gum example. Just gave my oldest the sex talk a month ago. I wanted it to come from me not someone at school.

I got mine from a pervert gym teacher in class. Parents never...

I found an LP record about how to tell your kids about sex - so I figured my Dad was brushing up on how to approach the topic with me. When family wasn't home I listened to it and thought it was so lame. I knew everything anyway by this point.

When Dad finally did get around to having the discussion with me it was awkward to say the least. I wanted to tell him "Hey, its OK, Dad. I already know all this" but I went ahead and let him do his thing.

But here is the part that blew me away. He wrapped up the discussion by saying "...and it feels great. But if you do it before you get married i'll kill ya." (he then gave me this weird grin that I almost interpreted as tacit permission).

Being a mostly upstanding TBM kid of the 70's I never did go all the way but I did do pretty much everything else but that :) .

My mom was an RN and nevermo, so she was pretty open about having ongoing discussions as questions came up. I don't remember any one sit-down-and-talk incident. I also had an older sister and four older stepsisters, all of whom had kids. And of course, I saw the 5th grade movie about periods. I moved in with my stepmom just before turning 12, and she needed to know if she needed to pick up pads or tampons or something for me. That's a legitimate question, if a 12-year-old has had her period yet, but I was mortified. I had, so I had to tell her what my preferences were for feminine products. She made me recite everything I knew about making babies so she could be sure I knew what was up (and that she didn't have to sit me down for The Talk™). I think I actually had more detailed knowledge than she did. I remember using appropriate medical terminology.

Because I'd gotten most of my information from reading the R and S volumes of the World Book Encyclopedia. Both "Reproduction" and "Sex" were in there in detail and in the A volume, there was a section of plastic overlays under "Anatomy" which were really cool. I pretty much dedicated a summer to reading the entire Encyclopedia from A-Z. I bet I was an insufferable little know it all. LOL

My mom would always put me off, saying she'd tell me when I was a certain age, usually 11 or 13.

When I was in 5th grade, I heard some common childhood misinformation at school and asked my mom if it was true. And she denies this, but I'm quite sure she said, "No, that's something a husband and wife do once a month to show how much they love each other." We were in her purple Impala on 2300 East, near the 7-11 at 7000 South. I remember the seat covers and everything.

Never really had one...learned it on my own....like, I'm guessing, most of mt friends did...and when I attempted to have "the talk" with my son, he knew it all....whew!!!

Ron Burr

Never had it. My logical brain figured that humans do it the same way they do on Animal Planet. Took me until 8th grade to realize, the baby doesn't come out of the anus. My dad started the talk with my brother once. I was nearby, but embarrassed so I walked away. It took me until 10th grade to get used to changing my shorts in the locker room instead of using a bathroom stall, even though none of us changed underwear. I was an awkward kid.

My mom handed me a book when I was twelve on the way to school. I was looking at it in math where some kids made fun of me. Thanks mom ! :-p. Then just before ny wedding night she told me it was alright for me to run around the house naked and let my new husband chase me and stuff . Hmmmmmm...awkward ! Thanks again mom!

The only time I can remember my mom talking about sex to me was once in third grade. A girl in my class at school had asked some of us if we were virgins. I didn't know what it meant and since most of the other kids said they weren't I also said I wasn't (I look back now and assume that most of those kids also didn't know what it meant, and wonder if the girl who asked was being abused, but I digress). Then I went home and asked my mom, "What's a virgin?" She gave me this really convoluted answer that made no sense to me and I walked away from the discussion not really having any better understanding of what a virgin was than I did beforehand (oh but she did set me straight about whether I was one or not, she assured me I was and had better stay that way). She was extremely uncomfortable through the whole thing too and I can remember not understanding why the question had seemed to unnerve her so.

Everything else I knew about sex I learned at school (sex ed started in 5th grade) and from friends--well and movies. I don't remember my parents ever talking about it again. Oh, of course I also heard a lot about it at church--don't do it unless you're married. That was really hammered in. I think my mom left it up to the church to teach us what was or wasn't appropriate sexual behavior, which meant I was uber repressed and ended up thinking that it was a good idea to never kiss anyone until I was sure that person was "the one"(that didn't work out well for me, ended up marrying a closeted gay man). Thanks mom and dad.