Will do. Our other son has already let us know he won't be here. It's sad, all this.
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It is. I'm so sorry you deal with such things. It's profoundly depressing.
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Everyone (I think) will be at our house Nov. 10 - 11. It's supposed to be a happy occasion, and I so hope it goes well, but things simmer under the surface and the slightest spark, comment, or wrong look will likely set things off. I'm excited to have all my grands together in the same place even for a short time, but...I worry. I'm really concerned about how things are going to go. My family
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I'm doing just that, but I miss my son - at least who he was long ago and who he could be now. I did get a few pictures of two of his three kids today - I was overjoyed (and shocked). It never lasts, but I take my tiny victories where I can get them.
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I'm cracking up. :)
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I wish it was that easy. They don't respect us at all, as I mentioned before, and, even though the Ten Commandments says so, they're also commanded to not traffic with unbelievers. They choose to go that route.
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They absolutely know it's happening, although our oldest prefers not to hear bad things about people. Even she is disgusted, though. Our youngest daughter is livid. Her relationship with her brother is incredibly strained, if not permanently damaged, which is sad - they used to be very close. You're right - we are the example of what happens when people leave the church. I know they use us
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I actually can't wait. I hope it happens before that. Their five-year-old is a incredibly intelligent, headstrong girl who knows her own mind. Once she gets a little older things could get interesting fast, although they'll simply double down on forcing her to be obedient without questioning. That will make it worse.
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Can't happen. It's the whole ball of wax (or crap, actually) or nothing. They won't budge one inch on anything. Ever. They totally believe in everything they've been taught and will not hear otherwise for a second. Besides, I couldn't give in on things I know are garbage, so there's that...
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Thank you. I feel so badly for you too. We're definitely past that point - he knows where we stand and it's unacceptable to him. Our other son is much more accepting and seems to be genuinely happy about how happy and at peace I am now, but our youngest son is not and, I don't think, ever will be. They know where we are, but they are so laser focused on being godly in every way (which include
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I hope others can figure out what to do in their situation, but there is literally nothing I can do to stop what's going on. My son is ambitious - blatantly, overtly ambitious, and he's climbing and work and Mormon hierarchy ladder as quickly as possible. He's a Type A person, to the extreme, and he knows how to handle people, money, and sensitive situations. So, he's on track to be what he ne
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You know, you're right. I realized some of that, but you brought out points I hadn't considered. I really enjoy your posts and this one is no different. All the more reason I feel like my head is going to explode most of the time.
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Oh yes, in the interest of the children, you see, so they're not around disbelievers who might contaminate their thinking. I've told my son many times - "I won't help you, but I won't hurt you either", meaning that, for example, if the kids were here and Primary was going on down the street at the local ward building, I wouldn't take them, ever. But, I also won't sit the kids down and
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Not that exact claim, but very close. They know where I am, more or less, but they won't hear it and won't even, for a moment, open that can of worms. So, she trashes me when she talks to her family (hours a day - who has time for that??), and they go on their high-and-mighty way feeling quite superior in all areas. Fine. Do that, but don't take the littles away. Again. They are greatly dis
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Same here and I'm angry about all the time I lost.
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Nice analogy.
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Thanks. So true, and my heart is shredded into a million pieces because of it all. One child doesn't care about the church any more (although she isn't as far down the road as I am), one went on a mission and is still true to the church (although he is happy that I'm happy and is more accepting of where we are in life), one child is exactly where I am, which is wonderful, and then...there's the
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The list of rules gets longer almost by the day. I really think their kids, especially the oldest (a girl who is highly intelligent, precocious, and headstrong) will rebel, at some point. I cannot tell you how much I hope that's the case. They're being raised in an incredibly strict household, with Jesus rules about everything. So far they're young enough that they indoctrinate easily and can
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Oh yes. They need to help us realize the truth and all. We're not allowed to be alone with their kids almost ever, and certainly for no real length of time - they don't trust us to not tell the littles how wrong their religion is. We've assured him we won't, but it's not enough. They have nothing but disdain for us, really - we have too many pounds on us, and they value perfection in mind, bo
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Yep, handsome. Gotta love him. But maybe not like him much sometimes, eh? Our third child caused us much worry and grief, and, after seeing me cry once again, he decided he would never, ever do anything wrong, ever, and would live the most perfect life ever so I wouldn't be hurt again. He's gone way too far, though, and I don't think we'll ever get him back. I miss my son. I miss what cou
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Our youngest is SO all-in with Mormonism things are getting bizarre, and his wife is right there with him. It has permanently damaged our relationship. They use the church and their callings as status builders and ego strokers, so those are EVERYTHING to them. He's worse the the worst Kool-Aid drinker you've ever heard of. When conference is on he bows his head for the prayers (they all do, a
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Don, you do have a way of stating things in a relatable way. This applied to me exactly. I was a constant disappointment to my parents (converted when I was three), even though I did do everything asked and required of me. I never understood it, but I figured I was such a faulty human being I was to blame even for not grasping the concepts. I kept trying, until I was in my late 40's, although
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I doubt he'll be allowed to do that. Oaks is chomping at the bit and the money still flows in.
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Same here, but I DID do all the things you mentioned, as a kid and with/for our kids. I thought I was doing the right thing and our kids, by and large, enjoyed the busyness - they're all extroverts. Where that came from I have no idea - I am intensely introverted and my husband is too, although to a lesser degree. Still, I look back at the busy work and I am alternately angry and heartbroken a
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Agreed, but I was even stronger than that. To no surprise, I'm getting EXACTLY the responses I expected, and I'm answering each one politely, but not backing down at all. They don't like it.
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Oh, sorry - I misunderstood you. I own what I am and what I say, though - I couldn't for a long time, but now I have to. The part of my family that is so problematic won't see the paper, so I won't pay any more for it than I already am, which helps. But, otherwise, I'm out and irritatingly outspoken sometimes. ;)
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They require it - letters can't be submitted without full name and where one lives.
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I enjoy so many people on here, but you're one of my favorites, Wally. I truly love seeing your responses - they cause me to think and mull over things in ways I may not have on my own. Thanks for your contributions here - they are so appreciated.
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Thanks. It's "out there" and I'm taking big hits in the comment section. I respond to every comment with respect and kindness, but also firmness. I call out the parroting of the lifelong indoctrination and point out other things members REALLY need to know. Who knows if it will help, but I have to hope that some people are silently taking in the information and maybe, just maybe, no
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Extremely irritated - he took liberties with the sentence in question. It says, ..."said to have been drunk and certainly didn't follow his own teachings...". Some of you suggested something like that, but I only agreed, reluctantly, to the first part of that. An editor of a newspaper putting his own words in someone else's letter in order to cover his butt. So, so wrong.
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