Developing...

This just in: Apparently the Every Member a Janitor Program is seeing pushback from members who are refusing to clean the church. In some areas, the church is devoting entire sacrament meeting programs to instruct members on the proper way to clean the chapel, complete with visual aids at the pulpit such as latex gloves, spray bottles, and chemicals. We are talking about sacrament meeting here, the meeting that is supposed to be devoted to worshipping Jesus Christ.

Stay tuned for more details and evidence this is actually taking place.

A new low by any account.

Is this for real? If so, where did it take place. If not, well, now everyone knows how gullible I am - must be my upbringing in tscc.

Crazy. Sounds like a real uplifting sacrament meeting. Glad they didn't waste time teaching about mundane topics such as charity or tolerance.

I'll bet they still saved some time to be sure to harp on the important blessings they receive from paying membership dues.. errr, tithing. And of course for the poor teenager who has to re-recite the sacrament prayer three times because he stuttered or something.

LOL.

This is humor right? The problem with Mormonism is that it is actually so ridiculous some times that you can't tell when someone is making fun of the or telling the truth about them. It's so easy to do both at the same time - like when they announced tours of chapels.

Well, at least it is true that they continually have trouble getting people to clean in the ward I am supposedly a member of. They nag about it constantly, and core members end up filling in for those who "forgot."

I hope they keep this up. It's a brilliant strategy for the COB to wear out their most faithful members to the breaking point.

To be honest, I don't see how a talk on scrubbing toilets could possibly be any more boring than the high councilor talks that they already have to sit through.

Amen.

That's a bummer!

The Mormon insanity just never ends.

While other churches are worshiping their god on Sundays, the morg holds business meetings.
Unbelievable.

Hopefully, the members will eventually tell the old farts in SLC where they can put the gloves and the chemicals.

Just because one ward does it, doesn't make it a general program.

One must always hold the Lord's toilet brush with one's pinky raised just so, otherwise Satan will seize control of the toilet water and nip at the Saints' buttocks, which leads to apostasy. Don't ask how. Just bow your head, raise your pinky, and scrub.

PLEASE someone take notes. Or better yet, make a recording.

YES!!!

A video of this would be excellent!

Someone please, please do this.

Not likely to use Sacrament Meeting. That is set in stone.

Maybe some other training type meeting.

Oh there's a fireside I would want to miss.

This might actually be a high point in the dreary weekly grind of Mormon meetings. As demeaning and wrong as this would be, at least cleaning instructions serve some kind of real purpose resulting in physically affecting a small part of your world for the better, unlike most of the mind numbing droning of false doctrine and useless busywork that composes most of the meetings.

To be honest, if I were still TBM, I would look forward to this. Even believers love a change in the 3-hour schedule of monotony. But they'd have to make sure they keep the spirit while delivering this divinely-inspired message. I'm not asking them to mention Christ (because goodness me, how often does that happen, even in regular talks?), but maybe keep with the olde english vernacular. Don't forget all the blessings we'll get by doing this, but also subtly imply that we'll never be perfect enough to actually get them. Oh and some Satan, just for good measure -- how would we be kept in line if we weren't told that neglecting corporate property was a sin next to sexual abominations next to murder?



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 09/15/2013 10:55PM by msp.

I think people should hire merry maids and then deduct the cost from their tithing.

Once, one of the HPs gave a talk in SM; included the admonition:

take your trash ALL THE WAY OUT TO DUMPSTER.

I KID U NOT, this guy was a revered HP, frmr bishop I'm pretty sure. He mentioned that he had face-to-face contact/access with ETB...

talk was about 20 yrs ago, I KID U NOT!!!!

plenty of times as a missionary we'd get a few discussions in with an investigator and then bring them to church and literally pray that nobody would say anything stupid at the pulpit

could you imagine being an investigator for this sacrament meeting?

I'd like to see the looks on investigator faces when the missionaries bring them for the first time to sacrament meeting and it's all about the proper method of cleaning the chapel and a nag session on getting it done. Nothing like making the missionary's job harder. lol

On my mission the president dedicated an entire zone conference to teaching us how to clean our apartments. In fact, he invited Don Aslett himself to come teach. Actually, it was pretty interesting, and definitely my most memorable Zone Conference lol

Probably the only useful thing ever taught in a missionary zone conference.

Hold your right arm to the square, with your hand in gripping shape, toilet brush
firmly held, and repeat the words, " pay, lay, scrub." Repeat these .words 3 times. That will do.

I have a friend in the Community of Christ (formerly Reorganized church). He says their branch has a "clean the church Sunday" once a month where the worship service is shortened, then the members get busy cleaning the chapel and rooms. When they finish, a branch dinner is served, spaghetti or chili.

I wish they would have taught this years ago in sacrament meeting.

It would have hastened my exit.

Cleaning toilets in a commercial building for no pay. I'm scratching my chin and coming up nonplussed. I can't think of a reason for it. It's quite a conundrum, because the motivation seems to be lacking. What is the motivation for doing it?

I wonder do they give the bottle a blessing before anointing the toilets?

That photo is priceless. We need more and a YouTube video.

Thanks for the laughs all of you posters.

Brethren,adieu, your comments created the vision of a temple full of members in their clown costumes, all with "white" and "blessed" toilet brushes raised in unison to the square. And, then in unison, they lower them to the words, "That will do," followed by, "Never forget, cleanliness is next to Godliness. Now keep those buildings spotless."

Heloman 8:1 - And they did apply the cloths of cleansing righteously upon the privies, and scrub mightily onto the glory of the Lord.

I would be surprised if this took place during the Sacrament Service itself.

However, it would be a 'perfect' subject for the 5th Sunday Joint Priesthood/Relief Society lesson (which is often held in the chapel).

Where's the little woman (or Beehive) to Vanna White the cleaning products for the congregation? Can't have the big, strong priesthood leader tainting his hands with products meant for wimmen.