Kerry Shirts. He didn't go after Mormonism. He looks to have escaped from Mormonism into Chess. Maybe he'll find the "real" Bobby Fisher.

Like grieving, there is a process one goes through when they change such a major part of themselves. Of course there are degrees. One might grieve the loss of a goldfish much less than the loss of a loved spouse or good friend.

There is no set pattern but I've come to believe that the amount of time to move through this process has a strong correlation with not only the amount of time but also the level of commitment one had to the Church before making the "exit discoveries". We write on this "recovery" site, and yet it is up to each of us to define for our own selves what recovery actually means. If you live within the Mormon Corridor is harder to make a complete exit because it is so much of the surrounding culture and there seem to be events and if only for a moment drag "the Church" back into your awareness.

1. curiosity
2. beginning of discovery
3. fervent study to combat creeping doubt
4. dismay
5. desperation
6. awareness
7. fear
8. depression
9. anger / bitterness
10.desire to destroy the lie - convince others
11.passage of time, bitterness subsides
12.disinterest

These were my steps. About a year ago someone asked me who the members of the "first presidency" where and I wasn't entirely sure. I hadn't thought about it for a long time. I was at disinterest. But as soon as I was there the theocracy raised it's ugly fist to control some facet of Utah laws and I slid to anger. These days I find myself sliding between disinterest and anger but I spend a lot more days unaware and disinterested than I do caring at all about the Mormon Church.

How about the rest of you? Where are you and what was your path?



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 01/21/2014 08:43PM by SLDrone.

I have more or less the same list as you SLDrone. But in a completely different order.


The desperation and dismay came first while I was TBM and miserable.

Awareness was second. A big jolt of it out of the blue--strong enough to make me know in a matter of minutes that the church was false.

Next came a blissful relief. I had permission suddenly to like myself. I hit the ground running and never looked back. Moved out of Utah.

Next came the passage of time and disinterest. I only even knew who the prophet was by whose photo was over the fireplace when I visited my parents. And then, I only knew the prophet by face because I did not ask the name and my family always referred to them just as "the prophet."

Then thirty five years later I stumbled on the facts in the Fawn Brodie book and I was elated. I was obsessed to know all. Like many here I scoured books day and night.

Then came disgust. By the time I realized how insidious the church is, I became bitter and angry at what it had done to others. I had already accepted that I could do nothing about what it had done to my family, but I was angry about what it was still doing to the youth. I am also extremely angry that they are not held accountable for anything, and continue wrecking families in their smug self-righteousness claiming they can do no wrong because they are inspired of god.

I go back and forth now between disinterest and anger, and on a good day, amusement. They are ridiculous.

I would like to say that I'm no longer interested in Mormonism, but that would be a lie. I'm fascinated by the cult that ruined my family, and I'm also driven to attack it the way it attacked me when I was young.

I remain in loyal opposition.

I do leave it alone. I'm not anywhere near it. I just hang out with ex-Mos. They're my crowd.

But I'm not anywhere near the Mormons. And they certainly aren't bothered by me.

I have one TBM friend and we leave Mormonism alone during conversations as well.

I do not apologize for not "leaving it alone." Like donbagley, I am fascinated by and angry at the cult that sucked me in. I want to see it destroyed.

More, the whole notion that "leaving it alone" is somehow the higher road was invented by and is perpetuated by TSCC specifically so we WILL leave it alone. That would leave it to them to keep sucking in and conning people into staying. I want to do my little part to fight that.

If you were hiking and came upon a poisonous snake that you narrowly avoided, would you wander away and leave it alone or warn fellow hikers they were in danger?

Dig this analogy Dead Cast. I can give a real example of a similar experience I had this morning.

Waking up way early I walked into the kitchen in my bare feat and after doing a few things by only the glow of a nightlight I turned on an overhead light and just as I was about to take a step I looked down and there was a scorpion in my path.

I must have waked over him at least once, maybe twice. Narrowly avoided the little bastard. I promptly did what I could... DESTROYED IT.

Warning others and seeking justice can have there place in life. If people want to walk away and never look back that's fine. If people want to fight the corporate church, strap it on and let's go do battle.

No. Especially if it were a copperhead snake! They are Satanic.

https://www.lds.org/youth/article/dads-keys-and-dangerous-snake?lang=eng
"Just as I was about to reach down and grab the keys, the Spirit gave me a distinct warning not to put my hand in that hole. The prompting was so strong that I decided to examine the situation more closely. I squinted and could barely make out the reason why I was not to reach for the keys. There, curled in the leaves and sawdust next to the keys, was a copperhead snake."

Wat??? Kerry Shirts left the church? How did I miss that. Do you have a link?

http://www.patheos.com/blogs/danpeterson/2013/08/once-more-on-purely-intellectual-loss-of-faith.html#comment-1021400569



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 01/22/2014 04:14PM by Pagag.