"Men:

As discussed, we will be having an EQ cookout at XXXXXX, THIS TUESDAY (as in tomorrow) starting at 6pm. The chicken will be provided, however, due to a tight church budget caused by the Obama Administration, we will need y'all to sign up for bringing some things.

Please respond to this email and let us know if you will be attending, and, if so, what you plan on bringing: drinks, paper plates, utensils, cups, chips, potato salad, dessert, or whatever else you want.

If possible, respond to this tonight so that we know how much chicken to buy. Also, reply all in your response so that we can see who is bringing what."



So...how exactly does the Obama Administration cause this?

And they thought the Tea Party was a problem. I would suggest bringing a box of Lipton. Only two or three cents a tea bag. And look at the faces of the TBMs.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 05/12/2014 06:43PM by rhgc.

That is harious, sounds like something my dad would write. I would love to hear his explanation of how exactly that is the case

Just shows you how unorganized they are!

Basic picnic between friends in the neighborhood would be better planned and that's an impromptu in the back yard around the BBQ!

Which in our neighborhood would include some shock top on ice.....:)

I would tell him that the tight budget is due to the fact the that the church would rather fund multi-billion dollar malls and real estate projects as opposed to the local wards.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 05/12/2014 07:18PM by summer.

BAM

Perfect reply!

I can't tell if the guy thought he was being witty, or if there was some weird Rube Goldberg chain of logic where that made sense in his head, and he was serious.

This is why it is so hard to parody Mormons.

Yep. This exactly. Major fail at attempted humor.

I guess this guy didn't get the memo that church functions are not supposed to take political sides.

Well maybe the Church has to provide health insurance for the employees...? But if they were already doing that, then it shouldn't have effected anything in their budget, because they would have been following the plan for Obamacare anyways. AND if they did have health insurance increases, all they would have to do is COMPLETELY eliminate the paid employee workforce and call in a bunch of new 'missionaries' or unpaid volunteers.

It would be an 'important work' of course.

Reply to the email that, due your own tight budget, also due to the Obama Administration, you will not be able to afford to bring something.

What a joke. The church can afford large tracts of land, but you, small person, will need to pick up their slack. And enough of the lame excuses about the church being so tight-fisted. Maybe they shouldn't hold a BBQ if it's going to hurt their pocketbook so much.

They take the member's (contributions) money and hide it up for a rainy day [which will never come] (umbrellas for the fellows)... then, when it comes time to eat, food is scarce.

Trickle down: it is blamed on government's attempt to make organizations come clean on their finances. This is the only church within shouting distance that disguises itself this way: "we don't have any money because the government wants some" accountability. Charity can only be found outside the Mormon Church. If the church doesn't break your back you will break it yourself working for them.

When will the blessings begin?

M@t

if anyone should be blamed, it should be the RS for not properly knowing how to "make ends meet" and "do without". But hey, blaming a non-priesthood holding black guy seems so much more sensible!

Tupperwhere Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> if anyone should be blamed, it should be the RS
> for not properly knowing how to "make ends meet"
> and "do without". But hey, blaming a
> non-priesthood holding black guy seems so much
> more sensible!

Where did race come in on this one? OP quotes a presidential policy.

It is ridiculous the brethren are having a barbecue were you have to b y o b

yet one more reason for eliminating the LD$ "church" tax exemption.

Oh man, snag a copy of that and put it out on Facebook, next to a picture of the mall, the new condos in Hawaii, the ranch in Florida, etc.

"We have had quite a few people commit to coming tonight, which is great. All from the EQ are welcome, so please come by even if you haven't responded. If you can't make it, then we'll try to do something over the summer to make up for it.

Also, please bring your own chairs to sit on. Let me know if y'all have any questions, and I'll see y'all soon."

The church is too poor for chairs too! Couldn't they get them at cost from City Creek? Surely there's a furniture store...

Two weeks ago I went to a baby blessing, and it was fast and story telling day. One lady gets up and lambasts the "socialized medicine" in Canada (she used to live there, I "guess") and how we are headed down the same road. I could only hope so...

I HATE listening to politics in church. I hear it every mother-f-ing day where I work, all right wing stuff. And then I go to church and hear it. Gawd almighty!