The sun did not shine. It was too wet to play. So we sat in the house All that cold, cold, wet day. I sat there with Emma. We sat there, we two. And I said, “How I wish We had something to do!”
Too wet for a ball, Too wet for a bat. So we sat in the hall And looked into my hat. Although it was dark, Much too dark to see, I began to embark On a great fantasy.
That was so great Thanks for the rhyme Old Joe really knew how To use up his time, In finding just what Would con women and men And eventually get young girls in his bed.
It will be off the hook You'll sit in the pew Two things I will tell you Lie One and Lie Two These Lies will not hurt you We tell them for fun Then, out of his mouth came Lie Two and Lie One They fell on our ears Till the lying was done...
` Joe liked to have sex But the girls found him odd So he had an idea "I'll pretend I know god! I'll look in this hat Hold some rocks in my hand Tell the sheep there's an angel Oh, won't this be GRAND"
So Joe told his tales About darkies and pales And some wars that occurred And some dopes took his word And he said 'By the way God said you must pay Cause your soul you just rent So I'll take ten percent'
'And while we were talking, that god guy and I, he told me we'd all get to live in the sky with a whole bunch of girls who would do what we say and he said I should start with a harem today'
So Joe looked around at the girls in the town and chose which ones he would like to go down and those who objected were reminded that Joe had been told by the voice in the hat That he must be obeyed, there should be no more strife And when Joe said "I want her", you gave him your wife
And Joe kept this up (for the people were stupid) This make believe guy-in-a-hat-sort-of-cupid As long as he thought he could, longer than that Until some of the people said "hey, where's the hat?" We've taken about just enough of this stuff And then things got weird and then things got rough And the next thing you know, Joe got what he deserved But a lot of his BS was somehow preserved By another old goat with an eye for the ladies Who reminded the sheep while there wasn't a hades They better turn over the women for fun And reminded them all that he'd soon 'breed 'em young'
<And Joe kept this up (for the people were stupid) This make believe guy-in-a hat-sort-of-cupid>
This described Joe so well - he was a man who made himself into the make believe guy with adoring ladies surrounding him, all the while fooling many of the people he just knew were below him and were also just plain stupid.