I have mixed feelings about it. I have kept my apostasy to myself. As far as my family knows or cares I've still got an uber testimony. He seems happy enough. He's a lot like me, though, and so I worry mission life may chew him up and spit him out. Maybe this isn't something I'm meant to stop. I don't think it would make any sense to them if I suddenly exposed myself and started bashing the church. I'm starting to wonder if there ever is a good time or if they need to know ever. I'm tired of a duplicitous life, though. I've felt this way since long before I doubted the church.

Close family probably should be aware, and might be aware of more than you suspect. I wouldn't show up to your 2nd cousins baby shower and spread the word there or at Grandmas 90th birthday party however. And don't blast off on facebook, Automatically you'll be de-friended by your self righteous cousin-inlaws who will conclude that you've been possessed by Satan, lol.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 05/10/2015 09:25PM by poopstone.

Tell him wherever he goes to enjoy his location --Enjoy the food, enjoy the architecture, enjoy the people .. It often happens to missionaries that they are chewed up and spit out .. However if he can look at this mission as a two year cultural vacation, he will survive just fine. Where is he being sent ???


JB

Foreign, English speaking, is all I want to say.

And make sure he knows that no matter what the circumstance, he can contact you and you will be supportive. I would emphasize that many times before he leaves - that he has someone to talk to in confidence, without judgment.

I did have a series of chats with him about this. I told as much that if he decided not to go, I would defend his decision to mom and dad if they jumped down his throat for it. I didn't tell him I thought it was all bullshit. I only wanted him to feel like he had a choice. He did confess that he didn't know if the gospel was true or if he wanted to go. He felt pressured. But after our talk he said he felt better. We haven't had any heart to hearts since. As far as I can tell now, he's happy with this, so I'm biting my tongue.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 05/11/2015 05:23PM by Cold-Dodger.

Remember, some of us can possibly provide him a temporary sanctuary from some of the madness.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 05/11/2015 11:58AM by michael.

I totally agree with Grits. Make sure that he knows that you'll be there for him no matter what. That no judgments will be made if he calls you, and that he always has you to run back to. Just be there for him. Me being the oldest in my family I didn't have anyone to really fall back on when I started having doubts,and I know that if I did it would have meant the world to me.

He can stop by my place anytime if he is serving in the SF bay area.

At least you had the sense to not go. My mission is one of my biggest regrets.