Strange out of the blue ding dong at my door had me ready to start yelling unholy words at 930 at night (The tired family puts the tired children to bed early and waking the tired children will make Tired very angry)

Seeing who it was had my husband ready to call the police

Hearing why he was here has me reaching out to see if anyone can tell me where to point him. Beyond just calling his family, as they are supporting it.

Where to you point a missionary to if he wants to just go home? He's done. He has no testimony. He came out having no real testimony but everyone told him he would find it here. He is tired of being manipulated. He is depressed. He just wants to go home. Are there resources out there?

Can he use your phone to call his parents or another relative or friend back home? Someone who can help him with travel expenses/arrangements? Or does he have a personal bank account or credit card to use for a plane ticket?

He is on a Skype call with his parents and my husband at the moment making arrangements to fly out in the morning. His parents are being pretty okay about the whole thing. Just wondering if there is a network I can give him a plug in for with other missionaries that went home.

Thank you ... was just given resource . :)

Please, please, please keep us posted!

I know it's asking for a lot, but the more publicity the better. Will he talk to a newspaper reporter? Not that I know any, but, man, the world (although only ex-cult members will really care) needs to know.

What Elder Olddog said. Please keep us informed.

Thank you for helping him. He was fortunate you were home and sympathetic. Thank you to anyone who helps these kids escape or gives them refuge.

You may have saved a life, helping this poor guy get home. Do keep us posted and keep emotionally supporting him.

plenty of RMs and people who have studied there way out of the church to give him the information and advice he will need. He might be a little leery of hooking up with a bunch of apostates, though. a Google search for "support group early returned missionaries" came up with quite a few leads. The top two:

http://utahcounselinghelp.com/support-groups-for-early-returned-missionaries/

http://utahvalley360.com/2014/04/22/early-returned-missionaries-thrive-with-acceptance-love/

It has worked out that he has a family member that goes to the university an hour or so from here and can miss Monday's classes so he's going to fly out with him so he won't have to fly on his own. I'm glad his family is being supportive of him being done. Not once in the Skype did I hear mom or dad ask him if he had prayed about his decision or about fasting or about a blessing. Honestly, more of the Skype call was letting the kid visit with his ferrets. And that was very sweet to see.

and for you for helping this kid.

I came home early from my mission because of illness in the age when you were "only supposed to come home early in a coffin" ( a quote from my mission president). My parents and bishop and people who knew me from my home ward were very supportive, it was a huge relief to be home and away from the control and nonsense of the mission and church. I sincerely hope my mission president and stake president are rotting in hell.

Please remind him that he is a *volunteer,* and as such does not need to justify how much or how little time he has *volunteered* to anyone. And thank you for helping him!

LETS DO THIS. WE HAVE SAVVY RM'S ON THIS SITE THAT CAN POST A COMPREHENSIVE, EASY TO ACCESS PLAN TO HELP THESE KIDS GET HOME SAFELY. AND I CALL BULLSHIT ON NOT BEING ABLE TO FUNDRAISE. THERE WILL BE OTHERS AND THEY WILL NEED FUNDS TO LEAVE. WE ARE NO MORE THAN USELESS GOSSIPS IF WE DO NO MORE THAN BANTER AND WHINE ON THIS WEBITE. LET'S DO THIS

His dad was pretty cool and outright told him that his college plans were not dependent on his completing his mission so I'm glad that he has that going for him. He said he was going to get back into school as soon as he gets home. He really misses theater and production he said. Good for him!

My husband had to go ahead and drive out tonight with him to the airport/hotel. It's about an hour and a half from here and the flight is at 640 in the morning so they have to be there pretty early. We thought he would feel more comfortable being in the hotel with his cousin and my husband than in the house with me anyhow ... and the tea ...

I'm glad we answered the door ... I'm glad we didn't immediately start yelling unholy things when we saw the missionary ... and I'm glad he thought to come to our house.

Now I wish I could go to sleep.

And as for the need of an "underground rr" of sorts for a missionary trying to "get out", there sort of unofficially are resources out there from what I have found tonight in the contacts that we were given, there are people that are willing to help, no strings attached, no questions asked, to get a missionary home if they need a safe way home if they want to quit. Reaching out on here or on the other networks that we seem to have to support each other gets the wheels moving. Thankfully, for the young man that we were working with, his family has the resources to get him home.

Please be aware we do not know the people on this underground. Do not assume it is safe. It probably is, but like all things caution is required.

There is such a RR by that name through another EXmo board, with a list of resources for unhappy missionaries. It cannot be linked from here, but it's out there.

How kind of you and your husband to help him! What a lovely thing to do.

What made him think of your home? Your lights on? Did you know him before?

verilyverily Wrote:
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> What made him think of your home? Your lights on?
> Did you know him before?


Yea, how did he find a beacon of light, a safe house, a formon... and I wonder what he told his companion to get away from him.

Perhaps someday he'll be here, and/ or his cousin, others.

Have y'all given him resources for guidance and info - like mormonthink, the Tanners', this board or cesletter?

Good thing you took in a frightened or fed-up, searching youngster, a mis-informed cult escapee, and were in a position to offer passage and kind assistance.

"underground rr" a while back, but I don't know if anything came of it.

michael Wrote:
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> "underground rr" a while back, but I don't know if anything came of it.

Well, it's out there, but admin will not allow posting a link to it, since they don't know who's doing it.

Very smart on admin part.

Just smells fishy to me. Missionary just happens to decide to quit, just happens to show up at an ex-mormon's house who just happens to post on rfm knowing everyone would be intrigued/excited, just happens to be giving up to the minute updates on the soap opera...

Not saying it's not true. Just doesn't seem likely to me...

Just trying to ferret out the truth, are we? (See what I did there?)

Interesting that the missionary showed up alone. What happened to his companion? It's rare that one would let the other out of his sight.



Edited 2 time(s). Last edit at 03/15/2015 10:44PM by wine country girl.

It's unusual, but not unheard of. If a missionary is bound and determined to escape, he can. I went off solo once. One particular sister in our mission was having an especially tough go of it and took off several times. I seem to remember that the MP's wife from Denver mentioned in her now-closed blog that several missionaries ran off temporarily and had to be tracked down.

It's very possible that this wasn't a spontaneous AWOL, but had been planned in advance. Maybe they decided to quit early one night and his comp was having some quality alone time in the shower, affording an excellent chance to leave.

I see no reason to question or suspect the OP in this case.

Book of Mordor Wrote:
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> It's unusual, but not unheard of. If a missionary
> is bound and determined to escape, he can....
>
> I see no reason to question or suspect the OP in
> this case.

Agree. On his mission in CA, my husband had a companion who got a "Dear John" letter and hopped on the first bus he could get back to his hometown in UT.

I have driven a missionary to the airport to go home after being out only a few months. Apparently his mother sent in his paper, assuming he wanted to go on a mission. But he didn't. All he wanted to do was go back home. He told the mission president, refused to take any advice about giving it more time, came back,made the call to his parents, he had enough money to pay for the flight, and he went home, married his girl a few months later and spent part of his honeymoon trip at our home!

I knew one missionary that was promised a car (in the days of muscle cars) if he completed an honorable mission. He did and he got the car.

Most missionaries we knew didn't take the mission too seriously. They had a lot of fun and managed to "endure to the end."

Hi all! Sorry I haven't checked in. Getting all our ducks in a row for our next round for the "resort".

Honestly, we were as surprised as anyone would be that he came to our house of any house he could come to, but, when he was sharing his want to go home with us, he shared how no one else would understand that he just didn't believe one bit of any of it and was just done. We have interacted with this particular young man several times prior to this, I feel a little bad, we more often than not very sternly told him to please leave our child alone.

We know that he made it home safe and his mother sends her thanks. I know that his cousin is planning to make the return trip sometime later this week but has friends or someone picking him up. Other than that, well, we are just letting things be where they are. If they want to contact us, they know our address (and I guess the Skype contact information now). If not, I'm fine with that too.

I know that our house is now and forever more officially a no go zone for the missionaries. Even with our having our names removed, there was always a chance that some random set might "accidentally" ring our bell but I am sure now that it is known that we drove this young man to the airport so he could go home, they want these kids coming no where near us.

What I take away more from all of this is that in an area like we have, where they have pretty much maybe 2 converts a year TOTAL, the pressure they put on these young people to sell sell sell the "gospel" is ridiculous. Add to it that they lowered the age for the mission program so here is a kid right out of high school that has never had an uncomfortable moment really in his life ..... and then thrown into this .... it's like they want them to fail. Pisses me off even more.

Anywho. Tired is tired. And Tired gets to go see a lady about getting my momma a base pass that last longer than 72 hours tomorrow.