Posted by:
torturednevermo
(
)
Date: May 08, 2015 08:21PM
My wife is the breadwinner in the family, who built her own business and is the provider in the family. I eventually settled into being a stay at home dad and taking care of the kids and playing music (without any financial pressure, which is great for an artist.) But we’re equals, neither one of us dominates over the other. She just likes to do that sort of thing, and loves to ‘be the provider’ like that. I like taking care of kids and playing music.
Many years ago I became confused and quit music and went to university to have a go at IT, which I was good at, but office work (mostly the people) just didn’t suit me, and besides, it wound up working against my wife’s business and just cost us a fortune in daycare anyway. When I packed that in and went back to playing music and staying home with the kids, I was concerned that I wasn’t ‘being the man.’ She said, ‘I don’t see why you got all sidetracked like that anyway, I married a musician and knew it. I don’t know why you thought you needed to turn into someone like my father. I don’t even like my father, you know that.’
So my wife takes the traditional role of a man, and I take the traditional role of a woman. So what? (But we switch back around in the bedroom, he he.) Who cares, as long as it works for us. That's all that matters, right?
I think it’s one of the (many) reasons our Mormon neighbors dislike us. Even though we are equals, to the Mormons around us my wife ‘wearing the pants’ must be, you know … satanic I guess. I do think they look down on us for our arrangement, but hey, screw them. I sometimes think that both the women and the men are actually just jealous of us. After all, we’re happy, and we structure our lives however we want in order to maximize that happiness. I don’t suppose my neighbors enjoy that sort of flexibility and freedom to do what works best for them. It’s all about the rules and roles of tradition, isn’t it?
That’s my story, and I’m stickin’ to it. We both wear pants.