So, for years now the relief society ladies have been filling my mailbox with reminders of their existence and that of my name in their records. (Haven't decided whether to resign or not yet, but haven't been active since 14 - I've never even been to relief society!)

Since I move a lot (still trying to find a more permanent resting place) and my parents live in the same town, I generally receive my mail there. So, too, have the remainders of my roles as a priesthood holder's private servant been sent to my parents who, btw, are definitely tbm.

Until, that is, this week. A letter arrived at my current lodge, from my "new ward's" relief society president with a sweet message about serving others (read: anyone with dangly parts). Now, I'm sure my mother is to blame for them knowing my address (which will result in a completely different conversation at another time). Right now what I want to do is reply to this nice woman who was so concerned of my knowledge of their current month's message. (Seriously, they are so much more annoying than any other monthly remainders that I get!)

Since I'm (maybe obviously) frustrated by them contacting me, I can't at the moment come up with a nice, well written, fitting response. I'm thinking I would like it to be somewhere along the lines of this:


"Dear (First) (Last),

Thank you for your message. Since you seem keen on discussing church doctrine, I would like to propose the following for your next topics:

(enter a nice list of the most sexist things uttered by the old and well quoted men of "the lord")

Sincerely,

ennen"


Any better suggestions?

"Visiting Teaching Message" in my mailbox every month... Please feel free to take what you want from it. By the way... after sending this I never received another VT message.

The subject of her "message" was to study the scriptures.

Dear Lois,

I am assuming by your monthly missal that you wish a dialogue with me concerning Spirituality. If this is true, I would be very happy to engage you.

Let me first introduce myself. As you know, my name is Heidi. I was born-in-the-covenant 6th generation Mormon. I went on a mission for that church when I was 21, serving in the Germany, Munich mission. I stopped considering myself Mormon when, after a long journey, the Goddess showed me the error of my beliefs. (I will keep the details of that journey to myself until we know each other better.)

Let me start with a quote from your visiting teaching message: “Invite those you visit to share what they have felt and learned.” Therefore, I will do that with you. Through diligent study and prayer of ALL scripture, (since one person’s scripture is another person’s mythology), I have learned that ALL organized religion is but a stepping-stone on the path of true Spiritual Enlightenment. The only TRUE scripture is that which the Goddess writes on your own heart, in Her own Hand. All others are a pale reflection at best, or a pogrom of self-serving personal or nationalistic megalomania at worst. The pale reflection is best understood by Charles Maurice de Talleyrand-Perigord’s quote, “Language was given to man to conceal his thoughts.” Human language was not constructed to convey the meaning of Deity.

In conclusion, let me say that I know the Goddess, my Lady, lives for She has spoken to me and written Her Will upon my heart and soul. These are the words that are, for me, TRUE scripture. I also know that if you truly seek Her through prayer and meditation, She will write upon your heart as well when She feels you are ready for the next step in your Spiritual Evolution. The spiritual Child is one that needs to be told, “go here, do this”. The spiritual Adult needs only one law, “Do what thou wilt, but harm none,” to live a life in accordance with Divine Will.

May Her Light shine upon you,



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 04/22/2011 01:14PM by Heidi GWOTR.

Haha, that's great! I might just end up using parts of yours!

Any doubt in your mind, Heidi, that your VT started whispering around the water cooler at church that you are now a lesbian? Wouldn't surprise me one bit. Such is the morg.

Just sayin'...

Ron

I've got a mountain of laundry that needs doing. ;)

P.S. I love the goddess letter!

Your parents may not have given them your address. TSCC has all kinds of ways of tracking you down.

I was tracked down rich after my last move before I even gave any of my family members my new address.

Just an FYI.

LOL Great response, Heidi. You're lucky though. They could have felt it more imperative than ever to save you from your wayward path.

Yes, ozproof, I have wondered the same thing. They do not serve "others"...only themselves.

of any kind. I thank you for the effort, but I'm asking you not trouble yourself or others with contacting me again.

Sincerely,

Unless your mother admits she ratted you out, it could have been others in the ward who were tired of contacting you at the wrong address.

resigning doesn't stop the invites.

I came home from a week in California with a ward newsletter very carefully twisted around my screendoor handle.

I always hang them on the refrig for a good laugh for my ex and son. I find them entertaining.

1. If you are an adult why are you receiving any mail at all at your parents? Do you pay them to be your post office? The meaning of an adult is that you can handle your own business...good or bad.

2. Why be contentious? Without opening it, toss it in the garbage with the other junk mail. Or if you really want to make a statement, mark it RTS/Refused and let them pay the return postage. They will get the hint.

3. If you are so anti-mormon, why havn't you resigned. That will solve the problem once and for all. I'm sure they have better things to do with their time that contact you. Either you are an adult and have the courage of your convictions or you don't.

She said she moves alot. When I was going through my college years, I was moving every few months, and I used my parents address for important things. I was worried about identity theft if my mail was to go to a house after I had moved.

Also people have many reasons not to resign, let people do it when/if they want.

I moved a lot too before retiring and I always used the standard change of address form rather than burdening anyone else. My mail always kept up with me too. Of course, notifying people of your new address helps. What bothers me and others is that people like to complain and bitch and whine and moan, but they don't want to take responsibility for themselves and make things better. I have never had a single problem with being contacted. A firm, polite no was just that and always respected. I have always remained on good terms with them and count several as very close friends. One is a SP, one has been in 5 brics and 2 SP's, and one is a current bishop. We argue back and forth, but at the end of the day we all respect each other and have for almost 40 years. Again, you generally get what you give.

And rap...people are free to post here what they will and I am free to call them out when they post inaccuracies or feel that all their problems are someone elses doing. Throwing shit at something hoping it will stick is at the very least lame.

You want to be judgmental about everyone on this board, go right ahead. You want to pretend like you aren't throwing shot youself and being lame, feel free.

But don't expect everyone to roll over for you.

Keep spouting that "take some personal accountability" line though over and over and over as you call other people lame. It's really funny.

It is what it is. If it hits too close to home, try moving. :) If you can't take it, then make sure what you are posting is accurate and respectful. Do you correct a child when he does wrong or just let him do whatever he chooses? Ask teachers what their biggest challenge is in schools and they will tell you the behaviour of kids whose parents have a my child can do no wrong attitude. Everyone has to learn to respect boundaries.

I don't need a lecture from someone who has been incredibly disrespectful to many posters to preach to me about respect and accuracy.

That "is what it is." And those are my boundaries.

Also, just as a freebie. Your use of colon's and closed parentheses right before or after being snarky - is an obvious attempt to try to pretend that you are "being respectful" when you are not.

It's a very obvious passive aggressive ploy.

Sounds like a bit of mindreading to me.

Speaking of boundaries and respect, I think it would do you well to practice that advice on this board instead of expecting it for people who aren't here and don't care about it, namely TBM mormons who are busy today getting ready for their three-hour show tomorrow.

In other words -- no matter HOW you live your life or how it has worked out, there are other people who live their differently and have different outcomes. And that's okay. The nice thing about people no longer being in a controlling organization is that they get to live their lives the way they want to. Your constant criticism is not only boring, it's also lame and pathetic. You don't like what someone has posted? Maybe you should move on to another topic. Just a thought since you find "complaining" so offensive.

He's done everything possible to stop it but somehow the post office occasionally lets a random piece of mail come here instead of his real address.

There's nothing so bad about a little contention once in awhile. In fact it's sometimes a good thing.

Resigning usually eliminates or sharply decreases mormon busy body contact, but not always. C12 seems to be getting as much unwanted church stuff as ever since she resigned. It certainly didn't totally eliminate it for me and several others I know.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 04/22/2011 07:26PM by Cheryl.

RTS/Refused will return the mail to the sender and cause them to pay the postage which will get him off of whatever mailing list he is on. If it is important mail he needs to contact them and change his address. Also, file a change of address form with the post office.

These steps really do work, just takes a little effort.

...out of respect for their parents.

As for mail, different families have different customs. Not everyone is alike. I moved frequently when I was young as well. If people needed to find me, they always knew that they could write to or ask my mom for my address.

What the hell is wrong with receiving mail at her parents' house? It's not like her parents are going to great lengths to store her mail for her. They drag it in from the mailbox tired, disheveled, exhausted and sweaty from all the extra work they must endure.

Besides that, she never specified her age? She could be 19. She could be 100. How do you know? What right do you have to lecture her about being an adult? Isn't this supposed to be the Recovery from Mor[m]onism board? Why are you trying to be relief society president?

Just because you file a change of address doesn't always mean you'll get your mail. They expire rather quickly, particularly if it is Standard mail which includes a lot of subscription magazines or other mail that is desirable. Yes, I know you can file with the magazines but that doesn't take effect instantly. In my personal case we had one that we had to file with three times before they finally started using the correct address. I haven't lived at my parents' house in over ten years, and I still occasionally get mail at their place. Old mailing lists die hard.

If her parents are okay receiving mail, then why not? I've always felt lucky that my parents are stable and have lived in the same house for nearly 40 years. I know if someone who knew me in the past *really* wants to get ahold of me, they can contact my parents for info. In her case it ensures she receives all her mail, junk or not.

I know I'm not supposed to feed them but those comments along with many others you've made are just patronizing and judgmental, Elder sukiyhtaky. You should get back to preparing your Sunday Skool lesson.

I was like the OP, I would move, and the church would know about it, almost before the utilities and the post office knew. I knew my parents were telling the missionaries where I was living

Hahaha it was the relief sociaty mailers that ultimately got me out of the church. As I said, I inadvertently resigned.

I got one of those relief sociaty letters one day when I happened to be in a particularly bad mood over the church. I had not researched, did not know yet of all the lies. I was angry at my high priest father and his petophilia bull crap.

I took the letter, wrote on the back of it something to the effect that I was not going to their church, was not going to raise my kids in a church where there was no other choice for women but to become baby factories, and I was going to raise my girls to know that they had choices. I stuck it in an envelop and sent it back to the return address.

Couple weeks later, I got a letter from the bishop that said basically, if that's how I feel, then they were going to remove my name from the records, and I had 30 days to change my mind.

I have not heard anything from the church since then except chance meetings with missionaries at the grocery store.

So....I inadvertently resigned from the church. This was before the RFM, before I knew the church wasn't true, before I really knew what I was doing. HAD I KNOWN, I certainly would have made a copy of that letter I sent to that relief sociaty sister, and a copy of my 30-day letter. I had no idea I was doing something so big!

Best letter I ever wrote!

Funny, isn't it? LOL