http://www.nearingkolob.com/returned-missionary-commitment-signature-required/

I saw this earlier and thought for sure someone would post it.

It has to seen to be believed:

The RM pledge to stay the course; I'm slightly amazed they don't want it signed under penalty of perjury, in front of a notary public.

Sick! Even when I left my mission the MP in the final interview cautioned me because he said so many missionaries go inactive then (didn't give numbers) but also said that if you made it to AP that you were twice as likely to go inactive.

I would guess the inactivity or apostate rate for RMs is much higher now and thus this silly form to sign.

The whole thing smacks of desperation.

My mission greatly reduced my faith in the LDS Church. Instead of becoming more attached, I was revolted by the corporate nature of the church.

I came up with a Mommy and Daddy version of the church. The Mommy version is the nurturing, loving, Primary and Young Adult version where Jesus loves you and wants you home. The Daddy version is the Corporation of the First Presidency, who cares about money, numbers, obedience and submission. I now see the Mommy as just the enabler for Daddy, who is really running the show. Is this a sexist analogy? Absolutely, but look who we are talking about.

If it's true that APs are more likely to leave, it's probably because they get more of an inside view of the corporate church. They see the disciplinary actions, the numbers, the cost cutting, and everything that runs contrary to the doctrine of every soul is great and the worth of each individual. When I worked as Stake Exec Sec, I became even more disillusioned with the church and its nastiness.

More guilting from TSCC.

she left off the list " suck start a shotgun"



Kidding of course

Ross Perot's company. You signed on for two years and if you quit early you had to pay EDS - in my friend's case - $10,000 a month for each unfulfilled month of the contract.

My buddy was stuck in some dreadful outpost while I vacationed in his empty San Francisco Sunset District house whenever possible.

After a heated argument, his immediate supervisor fired him. Oh happy day for the buddy! EDS tried to renig on the dismissal, but my friend won in court.

I was offered a job with EDS (I would have worked for my bishop) back in the 80s. I'm glad I turned it down.

Perot, who is a nutty control freak, only needed those contracts because he abused his employees. He justified it as the cost of training people, but good companies train and retain. Handcuffing people to their desks is only necessary if you mistreat them. Bad managers are the number 1 reason people leave, followed by low pay, overwork, and no opportunities for advancement.

The only reason you should owe your company money for leaving is if you received a signing bonus, and then you should only have to pay back an amortized amount. I'll bet the attrition rate at 25 months was atrociously high.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 01/23/2016 09:04PM by axeldc.

It looks like Elder Dodo Holland is finally making good on his oath to track down apostates.

Go get 'em, jowly.

If people are leaving you alone, you should do the same. People who don't want temple recommends should be allowed to live as they like.

This is absolutely stunning. TSCC wants to play like they own people.

gemini Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> This is absolutely stunning. TSCC wants to play
> like they own people.


And they don't mind letting you know it! Such a proud people...

Instead of thanking you for your service, they want to make you pay for the privilege all over again.

Each of you solemnly covenant than rather than breaking your post-missionary pledge, you'd suffer your life to be taken--that your throat be slashed and your tongue be fed to the birds of the air, that your breast be slashed open and your beating heart cut out, and that your belly be cut open and your intestines fall upon the ground. Now bow your head and say yes.

Who needs certificates wth that! The Boner.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 01/23/2016 04:35PM by byuboner.

Damn! You've got good eyes! I can't even see the fine print, but of course that has to be there!

Because (sigh) you and I did something similar, didn't we Dawg? It stuns me now, how I could have participated in something so barbaric. But then again, no one told us in advance what would happen.

Love you Bro, keep up the posts and play a great round for the Boner (or play a round with your own Boner!).

byuboner Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
>
>
> Love you Bro, keep up the posts and play a great
> round for the Boner (or play a round with your own
> Boner!).


From your keyboard to the golf ghawds' monitors, Jefe!

My exbish buddy wasnt even shy about admitting a 50 percent attrition rate in missionaries... that was before us old pot lickers could run a computer or iphone...id bet its up another ten at least...hes even almost admitted belief issues among his children...wont say who but we all know how that goes...its just a matter of mouse clicks and time...oops there goes another...im fairly certain hes got questions but so far hes just so durn glad to belong to gawds only true church...desperation?...you better believe it...doubt ive ever seen so many rescue missions in a year...poor old fosdicks just dont get the interwebs ...why we never needed these fandangled gadgets back in our day...and we turned out fine...you kids quit looking at that porn a graphy dammit...at least playboy had tasteful pics and GREAT articles...my buddy did say hes awful sick of hearing about porn and wanking..me too....i dont even go to church...the church that wanking killed

Which proves they're having a serious problem with RMs walking away. Hurray! It also means the main purpose of missions -- to bond missionaries to the church forever -- has stopped working. Hurray!

Are they for real with this!??? Talk about bizzare!

That is some sick shit. Mind control alert. Mormon Zombies wanted. Oh god that is so awful.

Let's hope this thread get archived. When I read the link, my mouth dropped.

Yes, this was mentioned a few months ago on the board. Insanely, such a huge example of over-stepping. The 21+ in members are left to their adult intuition and good choices. The LDS church has once again tried to implement a micro-managing scheme on their next wave of income. I would have gone ape shit if after 19 this corp tried to strong arm me after adulthood. The top are truly delusional..this is not civically OK on any level.

I think I personally set an *awesome* example of what an RM should be and do.

I left the church. I became honest about what's real and what isn't. I stopped degrading women and minorities. I got a good education, and became an honest person, a good friend, a good husband, and a good father.

My example is better than any RM who stayed in the cult :)

I agree with your assessment of your personal situation. And this is not meant as an intrusive question: who do you have to thank for it?

I urge you to think not only twice, but thrice...

Oh, the list is very, very long.
There were the missionary companions and flat-mates who showed me you didn't have to follow all the rules.
There were the non-mos I met before, during, and after my mission who showed me that you didn't have to be mormon to be kind, honest, caring, and informed.
There were the high school teachers and college professors who challenged my "beliefs," and set me on a path to learn facts.

There was even Brigham Young, who came up with such crazy shit (and had it published in the JoD) that to read it made me realize what a bat-shit-crazy religion I'd been raised in.

Then, of course, there's my wife and kids, and all the people here...who demonstrate every single day that NOT being a mormon is far better than being one! :)

Missionary: "Mr. Brown, if you come to know the Church is true
will you enter into the waters of baptism and become a member of
God's only true and living Church?"

Mr. Brown: "I would, but I signed this agreement with my
minister that I'd never join another church."

Missionary: "Oh, well, that's different. You signed an
agreement and we'd never want you to break an agreement you've
signed. Thank you, and we'll be on our way."

"Mrs. Brown, you've got a lovely daughter..."

I could not stand my mission president, and the feeling was mutual, but I will give him this. He didn't give two hoots about me once I returned home and was released, and I cannot imagine him having the time or inclination to keep tabs like this on all of his returned missionaries like this supposed "contract" implies is going to happen. Nope, when released, it was OVER in every sense of the word.

This is just a stupid, one last ditch effort to control the returned missionary at the very end with zero real intent at follow-through on the Mission President's part.

Adding insult to injury, the creator of this "Commitment" used the gawd-awful Brushstrokes font! ACK!

There's zero comments on the link!

When I was in business school, working on an MBA, we learned about getting people to make commitments explicitly in writing, because research showed that it greatly increased the likelihood of someone to follow through on a commitment, much more than a verbal commitment. I was managing our family rental properties at the time, and started having new tenants sign a simple committment to pay on time, and late payments almost vanished. You'd think a lease agreement would be a substantial committment, but lots of people just sign anything, like when the buy or lease a car. TSCC is savvy enough to employ this kind of thing too. People are more likely to keep their word if the committment is in writing.

Wish they would have realized the effectiveness of written contracts before they introduced the endowment, would have chased away a lot less people.

elderolddog Wrote:

> The RM pledge to stay the course; I'm slightly
> amazed they don't want it signed under penalty of
> perjury, in front of a notary public.

Oh they go a lot further than a notary... God, angels, and witnesses, with the penalty of being in Satan's power for eternity.

So, one person printed this up off Microsoft Word to show they're Super Worthy>?? Could be...