I don't know how to explain this other than to say that I was disfellowshipped for adultery last year and have these required visits with the BP.

The discussions range from the details of my transgression to where I believe I stand before God due to my sexual sin.

Yes... okay, I know. I should not have had sex with the neighbor next door.

The discussions just seem sexually kinky. What kind of a freeky church puts a gal through this?

Maybe they're just looking for good leads?

AnonAmongTheSaints Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
>
> What kind of a freeky church puts
> a gal through this?
>

Also ask yourself, 'what kind of a gal puts herself through this?'

Seriously, what are you hoping or expecting to get out of the experience?

+1.........next time tell the BP that you don't have any more sex at all & whenever you get married & have sex (whether you're married or not ) , that at THAT time it'll be none of his business anyway.

What your BP is putting you thru is bullshit. He is probably secretly wishing that you'd 'DO' him. . ( alright---inappropriate , I know. ) But doesn't it ever make you wonder. Because then if he 'slipped' , he could blame it all on you & Satan , rather than taking responsibility for himself. ( Then again....maybe whatever you tell him makes him more 'hot' for his wife.___gaaaaaaag)



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 03/21/2016 11:00PM by nitrameequc.

"The discussions just seem sexually kinky. What kind of a freeky church puts a gal through this?"

Oh, it's not just a freaky church. It's an oppressive, totalitarian cult. The discussions are kinky because the sick bastards running the show are getting off from listening to them and by making you grovel before their exalted majesties.

Really, you're too good for this kind of treatment. No matter what you've done, you're better than they are. End it. Resign if you must. Once it's finalized and you're out, you can tell the whole bishopric to go blow each other. And as you walk out of that hellhole for good, watch their faces turn purple as they realize they've lost, and you're forever beyond their power.

Book of Mordor Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
And as
> you walk out of that hellhole for good, watch
> their faces turn purple as they realize they've
> lost, and you're forever beyond their power.


This works in all kinds of situations.

A family member went thru something similar. I believe this is common practice and that the priesthood leaders get their kicks out of if. It's their kind of porn. Nobody needs to be put thru that invasive questioning. Don't allow them to abuse you like that.

Start running, and don't look back.

Whatever you have invested in this cult, letting them guilt you over ANYTHING is none of their business in my way of thinking. If you like attending then go, but to have a bishop or SP hand out church discipline sitting in judgement over you is not healthy behavior for them and for you and I recommend you tell them this.

Life is too short, and there are too many fun and adventurous things for you to be doing instead of sitting in an office having your mind fucked up by some men who might be getting their jollies by insisting you fill in all the details.

Your story is their porno....

Why are you allowing this? What are you still in this EVIL CULT?



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 03/20/2016 01:53AM by verilyverily.

+1

And he wants to express his kinky side in the process.

Do you really want to be in an organization like that??

Thank you for your replies. I'm not getting a thing out of church. Except there was an argument between the teacher and several students in Sunday school today. What a hoot!

Um, are you really that surprised? I'm not. Many bishops love to hear all the horny details. It gets them off.

I think a better question is why are you subjecting yourself to it?

Do you realize that in a Roman Catholic confessional, you would only have to confess this ONCE, anonymously, with sincere contrition, and you would be forgiven?

I would refuse to play ball with the leadership anymore. Say, you know what I did, I know what I did, I'm sorry, but I'm not going to keep beating myself on the head about this. End of story. Tell them it's been discussed enough. Tell them that whenever they want to bring you back into full fellowship, to let you know. Apart from that, just go about your business.

The best part of Mormon style BSDM is you can stop at any time. Really, it's okay to take off the handcuffs and say you no longer get off on being whipped.

Required visits with the BP? Ha, that's a hoot! Required! If you don't meet with him do you go to jail or pay a fine? You know what should be required? Standing up for yourself. That would be an awesome requirement, don't you think? Get the heck out of Dodge. You're an adult, for crying out loud.

Forget the catholic need to confess this to a priest, in most religions you don't need to confess to anyone.

Yeah. For a church that's supposedly so down on porn, they sure like to get kinky with interviews. But the most outrageously kinky thing I ever experienced was my (ex)husband's high council court. That I was commanded to be at too.

God, of course, could not know how repentant he really was unless he knew every detail. And those 16 pervs hung on every word like it was so important. Absolutely ZERO care about the fact that I was there having to hear things I hadn't even asked him about. Because I didn't want to know. But they forced it on me. Then in the end Joe Super Perv (who, come to find out later, was in the middle of an affair at the time), asked ME if I thought I had sexually satisfied my husband.

The only good thing was that it was the crack in the door for me. It was the first time I entertained the thought that there were things in the church that were total baloney that had nothing to do with God or anything He would approve of.

Wow. Sorry NormaRae. That would have been WAY more information that I would have liked my spouse to share.

One of the issues with the Kinky Bishop is that he likes my side profile. I have big boobs on a sleek frame. Even entering and exiting the chapel he seems to enjoy the view, and I wear conservative clothes. Pervert!

Hi, Anon! If it is feeling kinky to you, it is kinky! You can and should trust your own personal safety radar. All that priesthood patriarchy nonsense is used to groom you to minimize your own instinct and intuition about creepy and "off" situations so that you will submit to their bogus authority.

A very pertinent book for you is Gift of Fear. Very interesting read too.

An edit: The Gift of Fear by Gavin de Becker

Of course, it had to be YOUR FAULT. I've said before that my good friend (I thought) told me (he was a bishop at the time) that the reason my gay husband cheated is because I wasn't giving him enough sex.

It took me years to realize how abusive this was and I told him off about a year ago.

There are people who still think the reason my ex is "still" gay is because I failed.

Listen to your gut! Mormons don't want you to have any intuition, because your gut feelings are usually right! If it feels kinky, it is kinky.

Always be a beautiful woman! This is your life, and many times your good looks will get you in trouble. It is not you, it is them.

I suspect your neighbor was older, more experienced, and very manipulative--just my suspicions. Anyway, you need to be more assertive! Don't let others treat you like an object. Mormons treat women like second-class citizens, and the Mormon women buy into it. Open your eyes, and you will see that you have been and are being used! Mormonism is a cult, and they use children and men, as well. The cult wants you--your time and money.

What you might be feeling is how manipulative the cult is. The priesthood is made up. The Mormons have no "power" from God. They have no power over you.

God--if you believe in God (not the Mormon version of a polygamous God, I hope) has already forgiven you! Your duty, your destiny is to move forward and live your life! You will discover that the world outside of Mormonism is much more fair and much more loving.

I have been a single divorced woman in the Mormon cult, and I was considered "a temptation." Women got nervous if their husbands talked to me. (Sorry, women, your Mormon husbands are NOT that attractive. Ew. I think of polyester shirts and sweaty yellowed garments.)

You are too good for this kind of mistreatment. Please don't let the Mormons rob you of your self esteem, your individuality and the possibility of unconditional love. You can break free.

Oh, did I mention that it's a creepy hoax CULT?

This is beautiful. Omit the parts about TSCC and it'd work for all women...because the rest of the world is only a little less sexist.

I have a nephew that works as a counselor in a prison. The inmates often joke about how their "TV" is basically anything that happens during the course of social hour that is exciting and/or entertaining (e.g. fights, etc.) - since they don't have TV.

I think Mormon men in the high council have such God awful boring lives that they "hang on every word" and detail because it is so entertaining, and it's like soft porn for them - except that in their warped cult ridden minds, it is totally justified, sanctified, and condoned by the lard. It's also a power trip for them.

One point is to humiliate you and make you feel worthless. This
is a major point of the "repentence process" according to
Mormonism. You must, in their mind, feel "Godly sorrow," and
the way to do this is to, figuratively, put you at the city gate
with a sign around your neck reading "UNCLEAN."

It is all about giving up all authority over your life to THEM.
You have to meet with them and answer any questions they ask, no
matter how personal, embarrassing, or detailed.

The goal is for you to have a "broken heart and contrite
spirit," -- to be completely "church broke."

Here is how your situation is dealt with in the Scriptures:

1 Jesus went unto the mount of Olives.

2 And early in the morning he came again into the temple, and
all the people came unto him; and he sat down, and taught them.

3 And the scribes and Pharisees brought unto him a woman taken
in adultery; and when they had set her in the midst,

4 They say unto him, Master, this woman was taken in adultery,
in the very act.

5 Now Moses in the law commanded us, that such should be
stoned: but what sayest thou?

6 This they said, tempting him, that they might have to accuse
him. But Jesus stooped down, and with his finger wrote on the
ground, as though he heard them not.

7 So when they continued asking him, he lifted up himself, and
said unto them, He that is without sin among you, let him first
cast a stone at her.

8 And again he stooped down, and wrote on the ground.

9 And they which heard it, being convicted by their own
conscience, went out one by one, beginning at the eldest, even
unto the last: and Jesus was left alone, and the woman standing
in the midst.

10 When Jesus had lifted up himself, and saw none but the
woman, he said unto her, Woman, where are those thine accusers?
hath no man condemned thee?

11 She said, No man, Lord. And Jesus said unto her, Neither do
I condemn thee: go, and sin no more.
-- John 8:1-11

Notice that Jesus didn't say, "meet with me regularly to go
over all the details of your sin."

Whatever Church you are going to, it's obviously not the Church
of Jesus.

Next time you go for an appointment with the Bishop, really play up the kinky part. Have some fun with him. Tell him you've been having fantasies about the neighbor again. He'll ask what kind, and you can make up some really good ones. Also tell him you are really embarrassed, but you even had a fantasia about him (the bishop). What him squirm!!!

These people are in a world where they aren't even allowed to see shoulders. They have to get their kicks from somewhere. Think of this as your civic duty to help those struggling with Opposite Sex Attractions.

I used to get confused in the BP's office. Was I telling him nasty stuff or was he telling me?

Don't go back. It's not what it claims, obviously, so don't subject yourself to this nonsense.

Are you trying to patch things up with your spouse? Is he a committed believer? If so, it may cause a lot of friction when you ditch the so called "repentance process." You'll need to find another way to keep building the trust back.

Run. Just run and never look back. I was the victim of a Bish Dickhead Perv. He was grooming, then he became kinky and then he harassed me. In the end he tried to "give me what I need".
These guys are often sexually unsatisfied and they live by stories like yours. It's their kind of porn. I even don't went trough disciplinary when this had happen but he got aware of my "sins" and like said he was a pretty nice, caring guy in the beginning and when I turned him down in his obvious intentions he became creepy as eff.
Even in his defense at a real court he came across as freak playing the victim card that I tried to seduce him and when he "finally gave in because he is also just a guy I tried to blackmail him with kinky mails, pics and vids he sent me because I begged for ... and he is just a guy...and that I sent him signals that I want "it" too."
I don't say that every one is a freak like him but be aware. He wouldn't be the first, who's sitting with a boner under his desk while listening to you and objectify you for his own lust and fantasies.
You don't need to do it. Noone can force you. Noone can do any harm to you if you don't talk to him or let him know the kinky details.
I don't think that you are "strong and distanced enough" to turn the page and use it against him . It's just my gut feeling and I can be wrong. But you didn't do anything wrong and you don't need to put yourself trough this embarrassing procedure. Just step away from the church, this is not what Jesus would do, when you had "sinned".