Posted by:
flash
(
)
Date: July 27, 2017 11:44PM
It was on the morning of a beautiful, clear day, early in the spring. It was the first time in my life that I had made such an attempt to search for info on the Mormon church, for amidst all my anxieties, I had never as yet made the attempt to Google Search the Mormon Church.
After I had retired to the place where I had previously designed to go, having looked around me, and finding myself alone, I kneeled down, opened my laptop, and began to offer up the desires of my heart to Google Search.
I had scarcely done so, when immediately I was seized upon by the “Strengthening the Members Committee” and they gathered around me to bind my fingers so I could not type. Thick darkness gathered around my display so I could barely see the Google Search box to type into, and it seemed as if my laptop and I were doomed to sudden destruction.
As I was about to sink into despair, and abandon myself to destruction of being sucked back into the Morg, I exerted all my strength to use my mouse and keyboard to call upon Google.
It no sooner appeared that I found myself delivered from the committee which held me bound, the darkness did flee, and my screen appeared before me once more.
No sooner, therefore, did I get possession of myself, so as to be able to surf, that I typed in and asked “How shall I know of the truthfulness of the Mormon church?”
My screen now began to shine with such glory and brightness that it defied all description, and its glory did shine above the brightness of the sun.
And it came to pass that writing of a curious nature appeared upon my screen where it was written to go to WWW.EXMORMON.ORG. Then a voice of thunder came through my laptop speakers and said “This is my beloved website in which I am well pleased, in which I have glorified my Google Search name. Read ye its wisdom and thou shalt be blessed”.
I went to this website and feasted upon such enlightenment and truth so much so, that I was overcome with such joy and I fell upon my knees. Raising my hands to the nearest cell tower, I exclaimed, “How is it done?”. Once again, a voice of thunder came from my laptop and said, “Because of thy faith in the internet and your desire to know the truth of all things. Blessed art thou for thy desire to find truth.” After regaining my natural strength, I did make my way back to my abode giving thanks to the Google god and have praised his name forever more.