Hey guys, I'm a 14 year old exemormon (physically in mentally out) and I need some help with tips on how to deal with my TBM parents. They won't let me have instagram or snapchat because they think It's bad and immoral. For insta they say that they don't want me to have it because theres girls that I would follow that have bikinis and they think thats porn. Pretty f*cked up right?? For snapchat they don't want me to have it because they know about the disappearing messages thing and how easy it would be for me to get nudes, (Note, I'm a guy). They also take my phone away every time I do something contrary to the supposed mormon commandments and the for the strength of youth. I want to tell them that I don't believe anymore but I would spend the rest of my time at home being seen as broken and untrustworthy and I couldn't do anything. I'm a generally honest person and I don't want to act like a TBM around everyone. (Note, the youth call me 2 face lol). Whats the best way to go about handling my TBM parents so that I can have freedom to do things that are normal. For example, I want freedom so that I can have opportunities to lose my virginity. They're pretty much helicopter parents but with mormonism so any advice helps. Please let me know down below.
Thanks guys!!!

Hujo read my post on Secret to Mormon Church is there is no Secret.

First, situational awareness - recognize where you are at age 14, try to love your parents as flawed people, they have no more answer to the universe than you do but they are prob trying to give you what in their minds is the best for you even if they have to fake it to make it happen. Appreciate this.

Second, do not adopt the mental illness just cause they do. You can live an authentic life and do things with it that you want to somewhat now but more later on. But you have four years before you become an adult. As long as you are below that age and live in their house, mormon or not, you do have to abide by some rules. Just because they are wrong from a religious standpoint doesn't mean they aren't still your parents and providers for you. I am assuming all their rules do not constitute child abuse or breaking of laws.

Third, develop a way to learn and prepare for your coming life. 4 years may seem like a long ways away but it will go faster than you realize once you are done with it. Plan your future life now.
What do u you want to do? How will you do it? Spending all your time rebelling will get you nowhere when you are done. Get advice and help from parents, etc. now in ways they would be more willing to help while you are a kid/adult in training.

Hope that helps.

And seriously--I'm not trying to be snarky! Consider:

You and your parents (and many of your family and peers, I'm sure) are in the Prison of LDS Fanaticism. Your parents can leave anytime they want, but you can't -- yet. They don't know they're confined, that their jail doors are unlocked, and they can walk out whenever they want. They've become quite comfortable with their arrangement. It's their home.

Hope and pray that someday they'll seek and find their freedom. Understand you can't do it for them. And if you openly rebel now, they'll become more intransigent -- and fanatical.

Meanwhile, you are locked up for 4 years, so you have to obey the rules and make the best of your situation. So hunker down and plan what you're going to do. Think of your career, education, and job prospects for when you get out, and make what plans you can, understanding that you'll come back as an independent adult to visit your parents in their self-imposed "prison."

One more thing to the prison metaphor: you may have to depend upon them for education, getting your life started, and other things for some years after (18-22 or so). Think of this as parole or probation. You'll have to conform to certain expectations, but you'll have a lot more freedom--a trade-off.

Good luck with the hunkering down. Take it easy, don't rock the boat trying to prove to them you're right, and remember that slow-but-steady will be the best way to move into your personal, financial, and religious adulthood.

I endorse this caffiend-nated message.

Thanks, and I already have a plan worked out for my future. If you want to know more just ask:)

+1

I would only add that you have a lotta lotta years ahead of you in this world and this won't be the last time you will need to navigate a situation where you don't have the control you wish you did. Good experience for the future.

I love that 2Face thing from your friends. Definitely not 2Face in the true "phony" sense of the meaning. The truth is though, you will be playing the game with your cards held tightly to your chest.

Not just now, but for the rest of your life you will find value in keeping a lot of youR mystery intact and not advertising all that you are in a world that can't show off enough.


You may not know these old legends, but Mae West said "David Niven had class where other men only had cologne."

This is a good time to act with class---for yourself.

While you are still at home, it is best to go along to get along. TBM parents have been known to clamp down hard on kids that they perceive as being rebellious.

What you want to do is to play the long game. Start preparing for your future. Get the best grades in school that you can possibly get. Hit the books! Getting good grades will give you lots of options as you get older. At the same time, save as much money as you can possibly save through babysitting, dog-walking, yard mowing, etc. Get a paying job when you are older and save that money, too. Money is freedom. One day, it will allow you to leave your parents' home.

Do what is expected. Do church and whatever else they want without protest. You will survive without Insta and Snap Chat. The four years until you turn 18 seems like a long time to you, but it will fly by.

In your mind, you are free. One day that will pay off for you.

As for your virginity, don't worry about it. While you are at home (middle school and high school) is not a good time to be having sex, anyway. High school kids talk like nobody's business. Plus you don't want to have an accidental pregnancy on your hands, which might make your life a whole lot harder. Someday when you are off at college, or at trade school, or in the military, would be a much better time. More kids wait than you think. Don't be embarrassed that "everyone else is doing it," because everyone else is NOT doing it.

Good luck, and post here whenever you want to.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 05/17/2020 06:25PM by summer.

Summer is right despite all the talk and idiocy of high schoolers - do not follow any such challenges to your ego and get a girl pregnant.

You want a sure fire way to be stuck on mormondumb forever - do that. Your parents would likely feel justified forcing you into getting married to her, besides the fact the girl herself may be mormon so parental pressure times two.

Guilting people through their kids and spouse (maybe what your parents are in the middle of) is the whole mormon mouse trap and you would be walking right into the middle of it all and eating the cheese followed by a THWACK!!!

LOL thanks. I'll probably end up losing it when I'm 16 and can drive lol but i'll definitely do it safely. I can't have any baby mini me's running around.

Whenever you decide to have sex, *always* use a condom, even if your partner has her own birth control method (as she should.) When you are casually dating, don't rely on your partner's say-so. Use condoms as well. You both need to be using birth control methods.

Hate to say this, kid, but you're basically stuck with them for now. Your parents believe themselves to be the law and think you have no rights outside what they allow. My parents were the same way.

I second caffeind and summer's suggestions to be patient and bide your time. Get a job when the pandemic is actually over, study hard and get a scholarship, or, if it comes down to it, enlist in the military. I had to keep biding my time until I was 20 and enlisted in the Navy. Think of yourself as behind enemy lines; keep gathering intel and wait until you're able to make your move. In the meantime, keep the resistance alive.

Also, stop focusing on losing your virginity. I get it, you're fourteen and hormonal, but sex isn't everything. Wait until you've matured a little and only have sex with someone you want to be in a relationship with, not someone you only want to get off with (I admit, I'm a bit of a romantic at heart).

Great advice, thanks!

Save money.

1)Most of the people on this board are atheist, some with strong anti-religion feelings. I don't think you have to chuck God and Christ out the window, just because you found the religion you know best turned out to be false. If you're interested in hearing how one person left Mormonism, but not God, consider Lynn Wilder's autobiography. She was a BYU professor with strong academic credentials who left:

https://smile.amazon.com/Unveiling-Grace-Lynn-K-Wilder-audiobook/dp/B00HVM0VBI/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=ex-mormon+testimony&qid=1589759419&s=books&sr=1-1


2) Be careful about the footprints you leave as you come to terms with LDS and plan your exit: printed reading material you leave around, your digital footprints (search history, etc.), your LDS practice (church attendance, Word of Wisdom etc.) This is something you should keep private as you learn, grow, come to your own conclusions and make your own decisions. Remember, you're 14, and many things may seem very definite now, which you may want to reconsider later.

Lastly, remember your parents love you and want what they think is best for you--even if they're misguided. Part of being misguided is that they've been deceived by a false religion. Show your love by being careful and gentle as you move into your impending adulthood and independence.

Exceptionally spot on advice, caffiend.

Very well done.

I thought so too.

Me personally I haven't left God and Jesus, but I don't think mormonism is the way (obviously) lol. I'm curious about the footprints thing. I always go to private browsing when I'm watching fun things online lol, but whats the rest that your talking about?? I'm very confused. Do u mean that I don't want to screw up others perception of me and leave a negative story behind in the TBM's minds? Thanks for the advice caffined, this is very helpful. :)

Hujo you don't need to leave God to find peace from mormonism.
That is part of their brainwashing to try to get people to come back.

Keep the good things, realize mormonism has no monopoly on those things and add to it more good things.

Mormonism at best is just copying everything that says Christ out there and making you pay a premium for it. I call it the lazy person's theology.

Lmao premium
100% true though

Our advice is largely the same as it was in late January, the first time you asked about dealing with your parents. Re-reading it would be helpful. Good luck.

https://www.exmormon.org/phorum/read.php?2,2282788

>>"I want to live my life like a normal teen and do things that a non mormon teen does."

Hujo2, you seem to have a skewed idea of how non-Mormon teens live. I'm a nevermo (never a Mormon.) I was raised Catholic in a mixed Catholic/Protestant family that was not particularly strict. After my father died, at age 15 I went to live with my grad-school aged brother, and was given a great deal of freedom.

Here's the thing -- I was mature enough to handle that freedom. I didn't swear, I didn't view porn, I didn't go out drinking or carousing with my friends, and I certainly didn't have sex. Instead I went to school, I was a three-sport athlete, and a Girl Scout. In the summer, I worked at an ice cream parlor, and was a lifeguard. My friends were all the same way. We all prepared for college, went off to college, and have had normal, successful lives.

Yes, I imagine it's difficult living with very strict, religious parents. But please stop thinking that all nevermos go off the rails in high school, or that the things you mention are "normal." They are perhaps normal in some circles, but not circles that I ever ran in or would care to run in.

And as I said before, kids your age talk a good game. Maybe they have had sex, and maybe they are just telling a story. Did that ever occur to you?

As I said above, I would focus on things that can help you to eventually get out of the house -- good grades and money in the bank. And know that if you act like a mature, level-headed person, you are more likely to trusted.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 05/18/2020 09:35AM by summer.

Contrary to what the Mormons make it seem, with their constant drum pounding, sex isn’t the end all be all of human existence. It’s just sex, but it’s best left to the adult world. If going without Snapchat is a problem for you, what about harder stuff like relationships? Just be happy with your high school years because they’re not coming back. You’ll never have a time like this again. After high school it’s pretty much work till you die.

I don't know how to put this delicately, but what on Earth does some 14, 15, or 16 year old understand about making sex a worthwhile experience for their partner? For them, it's just an exercise in Me, Me, Me. It's like someone saying that they want to win a gold medal, but they've never been out on the ice. Any coach would tell you -- work on the fundamentals first!

How about learning how to properly kiss? Or how to do non-sexual touching? Or just plain learning how to converse with and have fun with potential partners and friends?

Hujo2, you are only 14. Right now, the best use of your social time would be getting to know people that you are attracted to, and figuring out what makes for a good, positive relationship. This alone will take up several years of your time, but would be a very productive endeavor. Have fun with friends in groups and don't worry so much about sexuality. Have some fun with flirting, and learn how to amuse others. Knowing how to make other people laugh is a gift, and will take you far in life.

Why the rush? Please trust me when I say that you have nothing to gain from it.

I waited until I was 30 for my first time. I don’t regret it.

And I am also a nevermo.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 05/24/2020 09:08AM by knotheadusc.

14 year old young man or not try to not watch so much porn that by the time the real thing comes along you don't know what to do with her.

I've seen a lot of who could have been good guys ruined that way.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 05/18/2020 11:20AM by siobhan.

I know it sucks, but this is a "their house - their rules" situation. Until you are an adult, paying your own mortgage, food, utilities, taxes, etc. - you have to do it their way. It's like an employment situation, as much as I would love to tell my boss about what I do and don't like, how silly some of the rules are, and have it my way, etc...I can't because I would get fired. Congrats on having the incite and wisdom to see through the BS that is Mormonism though. I applaud you. Not much longer...you'll be an adult out on your own. Then you can live the life you want.

You sound like a smart kid, but you are 14 and you parents can control you tightly. If I were you I would try my best to earn their trust. They are in a cult, but you don't have to be. You are going to have to fake it. In the mean time you can earn their trust and soon you will find yourself alone and able to access websites that you like, maybe you will be at a friends house. Keep in mind you don't want to lose all internet access, so you are going to have to walk a fine line. I wish you luck, and try to appreciate everything you have, even if you have to put up with Mormonism.

I was mentally out of Mormonism by the age of 3. I had to put up with that crap too, without the internet. I lived in Texas where there weren't any Mormons, so I found solace with normal people. I kept my family's cult a secret from everybody. I was even embarrassed to get out of the car with my church clothes on for fear of the neighbors seeing me!!

I'm 38 years old and have 2 teenage sons 19 and 16 by the same man. I had my first at 18 and my second at 22. I understand as a teenager sex can be hard to control, just use common sense like condoms and make sure the girl is on birth control because condoms can break. Also watch out for sexual transmitted diseases STDs. I know Mormons don't really discuss sex with their children because it's so evil. I still have my 2 sons and their father and I are very involved with their lives and we love them both equally. I know you have to try everything for yourself, but I feel like I've wasted most of my life with Mormons, Christian's, Satanists, Wicca/Pagans, and even Taoists. In my experiences all those groups are just as bad as Mormons. I've come to the conclusion the Mormon and Christian God is Satan. In the Bible in 2 Samuel 24.1 the Lord tells David to number Israel, in 1 Chronicles 21.1 Satan tells David to number Israel. This contradiction happens a lot in Mormon and Christian doctrines. You also need to be careful about rebelling because you can make it worse for yourself. I grew up in a Mormon family and it was a pain, I found a lot of daydreaming helped me cope. Just love your family and be your best, if that's not good enough for them it will just prove your intuition about Mormonism. I'm not trying to scare you, I'm just giving you advice I wish I got at age 14. Good luck, hang in there, and use common sense. One more thing, asking good angels for help works better so far. No Gods or Goddesses, just Angels.

And delete your browser history, so the parents won't find you on RfM.

You've got 4 years until you're on your own.
Start figuring out an exit plan for when you're 18 and not dependent upon them anymore.
Until then, you're stuck obeying their rules. And even after that, if you want to live in their house and eat their food, that pretty much comes with certain expectations. As long as they're not abusive, just hang tough kid.
Sorry it sucks I know, but it is what it is.
18 is just around the corner and so are the responsibilities of being a man.

If it makes you feel any better, many of us here grew up with, not only not smartphones, but not even cell phones, computers or the internet. I’m honestly surprised it’s a normal things these days for parents to even let kids get their own cell phones for a variety of reasons. When I was a teenager, the only way I could see naked chicks was National Geographic or if a friends dad had a hidden stash of Playboy, lame.

But honestly don’t think there’s a way to get those apps until you are older if your parents are helicopter parents.

But in my opinion, since it sounds like you are a non-believer, the best thing I can tell you when it comes to your parents is to show them you are a good kid, responsible, hard working, good hearted, and overall good person. You are not going to gain respect gifting your parents if you act like a rebellious teenager. And that stigma is only going to make it much worse for you when you eventually break the news to then that you no longer believe. They will have no respect for you because they will see it as an outgrowth of your rebelliousness and not because you sincerely don’t believe.

Case in point. My younger brother was the black sheep of the family. Hated church, skipped all the time, fought with my parents over everything, dropped out of high school, started smoking weed at 14, etc.

I on the other hand was “the Golden Child.” Went to church, was positive, helped parents around the house, earned my Eagle, never drank or smoked, went on a mission, and had a really good relationship with them.

As we became adults, naturally my brother bagged on the church, tried to tell my parents it’s a cult and they were stupid to keep going and believing in it. Of course, my parents paid him no respect and were always frustrated with him.

However, I eventually studied my way out of the church and stopped believing. When I told my mother I no longer believed, they had a very different attitude with me than with my “rebel” brother. They actually listened to what I said and took what I said seriously and didn’t just judge or scold me. They heard me out and I ended up sharing with them what I learned. They soon stopped believing too! And I think that only happened because I built up trust in their eyes and they knew I was a good, sincere person that wasn’t just being some rebellious kid like my brother.

So do your best to be a good kid and earn their respect and trust and it will help you with your relationship with them now and didn’t the road. You are still a minor and so there is only so much freedom you are going to be allowed and you can only bargain with them so much. I know at 14, fours years to freedom seems like forever but trust me, it’s not. Just enjoy what you got now and prepare for your future when you can really enjoy your freedom. You got the rest of your adult life to do what you want, enjoy the short time now just being a kid and don’t burn bridges with your parents because it will only make things worse.

Ex-Cultmember Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> If it makes you feel any better, many of us here
> grew up with, not only not smartphones, but not
> even cell phones, computers or the internet.

Dude, I remember when my parents upgraded to a color TV from their black and white Unit..... and it was a huge deal, and when 8 Track tapes came out.

> I’m
> honestly surprised it’s a normal things these
> days for parents to even let kids get their own
> cell phones for a variety of reasons.

IF I had been able to research and see the (creepy ass mock throat slashing, stupid secret handshaking) MORmON temple ceremony on something like the internet/ youtube before being blindsided by it firsthand ....in the HELL HOUSE MORmON temple, then I would have been out of THE (MORmON) church at age 14. and as much emphasis as my MORmON family put on the temple back then, I certainly would have researched it to the fullest extent. ...I did research it to the fullest extent back then, but there was NOT any information available beyond the superficial fluff that LDS inc was using to skirt/ hide the issue of how STUPID their hoaky temple ceremony really is.
....but things have definitely CHANGED !!!


PROUD!!! to present this video link https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JDPvw3fkjLw of this video that LDS Inc HATES and that has had over a million hits on various sites /accounts

It's weird that in Mormonism you get less grief for being a totally out of control person than your do for being a decent person who simply doesn't believe their myth.

Stand your ground. Get to know individual issues and bare you testimony to them. When they talk about the Church share your thoughts and what you know in your heart.

And if they keep punishing you for your convictions just tell that you won't love them anymore, because they obvious don't respect you. And when you're 18 you're out, and when you get married or have children they aren't invited.

And ask them what kind of relationship do they really want in the future. That's what I did with my Mom when she kept sharing me her testimony and what's in her heart, and shared with her what's in mine. And I didn't stand down.

They have to think what kind of relationship they want for you. You think you up for that? I don't know you on a personal level, so I am not sure. This worked for me, and my Mom and I get a long great.

guy34 Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Stand your ground.

I totally understand the sentiment.....however!!! getting into a sentiment based pissing contest with MORmON parents who have all the fire power since they are adults when the opposing person has the extreme DISADVANTAGE of being a dependent minor under their care and supervision can be extremely perilous.

A person needs to bide their time until the playing field has leveled MUCH MORE, like when the minor crosses the threshold of legal age. EVEN SO the person making the transition is STILL hugely disadvantaged from a financial stand point ......LDS Inc is counting on that !!!!!

Telling your MORmON Mom and MORmON Male parent the LIE that you plan on going on a mission to keep them off of your back through out high school is completely acceptable as far as I am concerned !!!!

FAR Better to blind side them (the cheesy ass MORmON LIARS/ cultist manipulators) when the time comes with the news that your plans (supposedly) changed at the last minute, and that you just need a little bit more time..... (which is going to turn into a permanent postponement which they are not entitled to know until it's way too late) than to have LDS Inc blindside you with coerced oaths of submission/ obedience in the Hell house MORmON temple based on STUPID ASS SECRET HANDSHAKES and threats of divine retribution ......in the Hell House MORmON temple. In my day that Hellish regimentation included the NASTY threat that some one from the MORmON church was entitled to cut a person's throat for failing to live up to the commitments being heaped upon them ...... WHAT A CRAPPY DEAL THAT WAS !!!!!

> Get to know individual issues
> and bare you testimony to them. When they talk
> about the Church share your thoughts and what you
> know in your heart.
>
> And if they keep punishing you for your
> convictions just tell that you won't love them
> anymore, because they obvious don't respect you.
> And when you're 18 you're out, and when you get
> married or have children they aren't invited.
>
> And ask them what kind of relationship do they
> really want in the future. That's what I did with
> my Mom when she kept sharing me her testimony and
> what's in her heart, and shared with her what's in
> mine. And I didn't stand down.
>
> They have to think what kind of relationship they
> want for you. You think you up for that? I don't
> know you on a personal level, so I am not sure.
> This worked for me, and my Mom and I get a long
> great.

That's awesome ........for you...... HOWEVER it would have been complete suicide going up against a super nazi MORmON enforcement agent like the super ass hole MORmON male parent that I had.

We are talking about situations where a young person is going up against an adult parent who has vastly more adult experience in life and in contending with people, and vastly more adult resources than the younger person does.

That's a strategy that has also backfired on a number of kids. The parents clamp down and put them on house arrest.

summer Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> That's a strategy that has also backfired on a
> number of kids.

the thing that backfired on them was being born to crappy MORmON parents


> The parents clamp down and put
> them on house arrest.

Well, when a person is dealing with (FUCKING ASSHOLE) super manipulative MORmON parents who are Hell bent on getting their way with their child so that they can look good to the other ward members or they would just as soon see their kids get destroyed as an fabled example of what happens when people fail to obey MORmON Jesus'grand plan for *happiness* that means giving THE church everything that it demands and trying to get by with the tiny bit of whatever is left over, then a person has an uphill battle no matter which direction they try to go .......ASK ME HOW I KNOW !!!!

However, parents can not legally put an 18 year old under house arrest, and LDS Inc is not sending people under 18 years of age on full time missions ......yet. So a person can play out that deal right to the last day when they turn 18 to keep such parents off of their back ......what else are they going to do with those kinds of parents anyway ?? go through with the Hell of going on a mission to keep their parents happy, to postpone being dumped into supporting themselves just two years later anyway??? because that is how those kind of MORmON parents operate, because they have tithing to pay and other kids to send on missions instead of helping out their kids into adulthood. What kind of an alternative is being coerced into a mission ???? -a MORmON alternative!!!!

The difficulty comes as an 18 year old tries to establish themselves as an independent living adult IF they are forced to move out. It's a big leap. And it's harder now than in earlier days. AND the nasty jackals and vultures at LDS Inc are counting on that. They said as much in the LDS church news. So with the assistance of MORmON parents, the jackals at LDS inc are hoping to use that situation to coerce young people into MORmON missions.....because the 100 Billion dollar plus MOReMONey reserves that LDS Inc already has just is not enough!!!

you objected to what I suggested, do you have a better idea???

The fucking asshole MORmON enforcement agent that I had as a male parent can be thankful that he is dead so that he will never have to depend on me for support in his twilight years. I would NEVER lay on hand on him ....the way that he did to me, .....but I would not stop anyone else who did.= And I would abandon his foul old MORmON ass to fend for himself no matter how helpless or infirmed or cold or hungry that he might have been. He'd be forced to count on his beloved MORmON Jesus and his MORmON church to bail out his MORmON ass. Just guess how and where I learned to be so (un)concerned about his well being and welfare !!!!

>>you objected to what I suggested, do you have a better idea???

I'm simply pointing out that there may be severe consequences to outing yourself while still a minor and living at home. I have been on this board for years, and I also have read r/exmo and other forums for years. I've seen this scenario where parents clamp down hard time and time again.

What do I mean by clamp down? No privileges whatsoever. No clubs, after school sports, dances, after school and summer jobs, no car or access to a car, no dating, no going out with friends, no allowance, no cell phone, etc. along with having your every move constantly monitored are all possibilities. Lots of kids have had their high school lives made miserable by coming out too soon. This is why I advocate the "going along to get along method" and trying to fly under the radar. Go to church, go to other required activities, toe the company line. Meanwhile get good grades to expand your post-high school options, and save your money.

Guy34 brought up a different approach, and that's fine. I think that young people need to consider all possible options, along with the possible benefits and consequences of each option, and then make their own decision.

In the end, young people know their parents, and are in a better position to ultimately make that call.

You are so DAMN LUCKY to NOT be under the MORmON spell at your young age.

I would give a toe or two, and a finger, without even thinking about it to be as LUCKY as you are, to have been out from under the suffocating toxic spell and influence of toxic MORmONISM at that stage of my life. You may be impatient now, which is completely understandable, but relax, you can have YOUR life on YOUR terms instead of on MORmON terms .....like going on a full time MORmON mission to try to prove yourself.... and then finding out that you got jacked for two years of your life that could have been spent doing things for yourself, instead of adding some more to LDS Inc's completely OBSCENE 100 billion dollar plus cash reserves !!!!

IF you need to, LIE to your MORmON parents about your plans for the future, to let them hear what they want to hear, giving them false expectations that you can turn to your favor and fail to deliver on later, once you have more control of your life ........since their stupid ass church does that to them everyday!!!! so you can get by until you are more on your own. It's so much better than having them and their church screw you over, and then fail to deliver. ......YOU ARE SO LUCKY !!!!

Instagram and Snapchat are horrible places... Avoid. As is social media.