Posted by:
anona
(
)
Date: May 15, 2012 12:27PM
Last week i got a call from 3rd grade DS's school teacher about him not wanting to do his work, being overwhelmed, not focusing, and basically shutting down in class. This has been somewhat ongoing issue for him this year. He is on the autism spectrum but is very high-functioning/aspergers type. When he came home from school i had a chat with him to see what was going on & see how he was feeling etc. Well come to find out he is being bullied and has been all year!! The school has had anti-bully presentations, so he knew "what bullies do" but never connected that HE was being bullied. It makes me so sad & angry that he has had to deal with this all school year long and I didn't have a clue!! Most of them are a little older/bigger than him as well. About a month ago some of them ran up behind him after school and shoved him on the ground. It cut open & bruised his knee, and it hurt his back. At the time i thought it was an isolated incident but immediately called the school. The school is supposed to be taking steps to resolve it, but i am really concerned that it will not really get resolved.
Then a couple days ago one of the neighbor girls who my 2nd grade DD daughter plays with, started in with typical girly-type meanness that quickly escalated to some pretty nasty bullying. This girl is nice about half the time, but she also has a very mean vindictive side to her. When I found out what she was doing i went over and had a chat with her and basically told her that if she going to behave like that, then she would be sent home, and then the typical stuff about.. how she would feel if someone treated her that way.. and she might want to think about apologizing etc. Thankfully she did come back and brought the other friend they were playing with to apologize. But she is so mean and pushy that she manipulates the other girls in the neighborhood/school into doing whatever it is she wants. So basically if she didn't come and apologize the other girl (who is a sweetheart most of the time) probably wouldn't have apologized either. (or at least not the other girl had left)
Also, over the weekend we put DD's hair in a bunch of tiny braids. We've done it before, Its really cute, and DD really likes it and its easy for the summer, but she's never worn them to school before. This morning when she was getting ready to leave I asked her if her friends liked her braids yesterday, & found out that were calling her names!! The same naughty neighbor girl is in her school class and was one of the worst offenders. When DD left she had the saddest face, and really broke my heart. I actually considered keeping her home for a while to take them out, but I think she wanted to leave them in. I'm sure tonight she will want to to take them out though. It makes me so angry that they cant just chill out and be nice. DD is not perfect by any means, but she is usually kind, happy, friendly, and most often the one who looks out for everyone else. Why would the pick on her?!?! This is only 2ND GRADE!!!
My oldest DS is in middle school. He also is on autism spectrum/very high-functioning/aspergers. He has never had a problem with bullying, most of the kids are usually really nice to him but he doesn't really have any close friends either. There are also several boys who are constantly pushing him to come to church/church activities etc. I know that for some of them they could care less about being friends with him otherwise.
We live in a very small town & i am really concerned for my kids to grow up and go to school with a lot of the kids around here. I don't really have another choice right now. I know it happens everywhere you go, so who's to say it would be be better and not worse somewhere else. It also makes me wonder how much/if any of the bullying is in part, from kids overhearing parents gossip about our family etc. I have personally had some issues with some of my "friends" & old ward members shunning/spreading gossip etc. since leaving TSSC. So who knows. I guess I'm just rambling now.. thanks for letting me vent!!