Posted by:
imaworkinonit
(
)
Date: April 12, 2013 11:01AM
I don't know if this will help at all. But when I left Mormonism, I was sometimes plagued by guilt and fear over things I didn't even believe anymore. I think that at some level of my brain, there was an automatic visceral response to certain things, that triggered a response of guilt/fear, along with all the negative chemicals in the body that those create. All I know is that it wasn't rational, and it really bothered me.
What I had to do was mentally yell "STOP!" when I started feeling those feelings. Then I would review that I didn't believe that anymore, and mentally list why. I think I was rewiring my brain, and it took quite a while (Maybe 6 months to a year). And for years after, things would still come up that I'd have to stop and think through and recondition myself about. This is basically a thought-stopping practice, just like cults use to control others, except I was using it on myself.
I think your reaction is a well-worn pathway in your brain. Another possibility is to create a new pathway in your brain when you start to think or feel that way. That could be some kind of a mantra, or a redirection/distraction of your thoughts.
I'm reading a really good book called "The Power of Habit" by Charles Duhigg, and he talks a lot about the mechanism of habits, how they are created, and the power of using established automatic responses/habits to create new ones. He does also talk about alcohol/addiction. This is not a self-help book, although there is an appendix on how to apply the ideas in the book. Of course, though, the whole time I've been reading it, it's giving me ideas I'm starting to use.
The most helpful thing to me is realize that I have certain stimuli and responses, and rewards in my life. If I can recognize the stimuli, and insert a different response, then I can get a different result.
http://www.amazon.com/Power-Habit-What-Life-Business/dp/1400069289/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1365778626&sr=1-1&keywords=the+power+of+habit