Recovery Board  : RfM
Recovery from Mormonism (RfM) discussion forum. 

Pages: 12Next
Results 1 - 30 of 34
4 years ago
JadeDuck
I didn't go in the temple to do baptisms until I was 18 and I had a panic attack. I wondered why I would have a panic attack in the place closest to God. Doctrinally, it was when I realized the cross isn't where Christ atoned, but in the Garden of Gethsemane. I just couldn't accept that
Forum: Recovery Board
4 years ago
JadeDuck
I do want to tell them. I've been out of the church for almost a year and have been working towards another religion (although I'm not going regularly yet). I just don't know how to tell them I'm really done.
Forum: Recovery Board
4 years ago
JadeDuck
I definitely don't want to turn his wedding into my announcement of leaving the church. My concern was if he asked me to participate in the ceremony and me having to tell him then that I was done, and making things awkward that way. I'll probably just wait and see if he even asks. I haven't told him anything, but my parents might have relayed the "she's-probably-not-interested" vibe, I
Forum: Recovery Board
4 years ago
JadeDuck
This is why I feel compelled to bring it up. I don't know if he is going to want me to participate, but I also don't want him to ask me and find out that way that I'm done with the church. I guess I'll wait to see if he asks; maybe my parents have filled him in more than I know
Forum: Recovery Board
4 years ago
JadeDuck
How did you guys tell your Mormon families you were done? Mine knows I'm questioning, and they are getting the idea, but my brother's temple wedding is coming up and he has no idea. How do I break it to him?
Forum: Recovery Board
4 years ago
JadeDuck
You're right, chamber music does have a leader. I was talking about a conductor as a separate entity. And yes, while some conductors do play from the podium, it is not as common as it once was. It's really awesome when they can do it though!
Forum: Recovery Board
4 years ago
JadeDuck
You can work without a conductor, but it's a whole lot harder to stay together that way. Chamber groups often don't have conductors, but they're small; there are so many moving parts in large groups that it's hard for everyone to be able to rely on each other all the time. I think with flash mobs, conductors are especially important, as you have to rely on someone to queue you in to start playing
Forum: Recovery Board
4 years ago
JadeDuck
How did you have the energy? I poured so much into understanding Mormonism that I just don't know how to learn a new belief system. I feel like I used up all my energy. At what point did you just give up? If you didn't, what kept you going?
Forum: Recovery Board
4 years ago
JadeDuck
Mormonism has complicated my family dynamic and caused me endless distress, but it also gave me the most beautiful family. It's because of Mormonism that I grew up with both of my parents (my dad would've traded in his share of custody if my mom stayed Mormon for the sake of giving my sister and me more stability). It's because of Mormonism that I have three beautiful half-brothers. It's because
Forum: Recovery Board
4 years ago
JadeDuck
YW: I am a beloved daughter of Heavenly Parents, with a divine nature and eternal destiny. As a disciple of Jesus Christ, I strive to become like Him. I seek and act upon personal revelation and minister to others in His holy name. I will stand as a witness of God at all times and in all things and in all places. As I strive to qualify for exaltation, I cherish the gift of repentance
Forum: Recovery Board
4 years ago
JadeDuck
It must be really scary to give the power of God to teenage boys that you have no trust in whatsoever. The girls get no power but all the responsibility. Weird...(heavy sarcasm)
Forum: Recovery Board
4 years ago
JadeDuck
I liked a lot of the changes the church made to the YW theme. I'm out of it now, but I sisters still in, and I feel like this theme is a much more loving and accessible message for them to grow up with than the old theme that seemed... Aggressive. I also like the mention of Heavenly Parents; as a girl, Heavenly Mother was a great comfort to me, and I think it's good for such an important figure n
Forum: Recovery Board
4 years ago
JadeDuck
This response was super thorough and informative; thank you for taking the time to write all this out! I really appreciate it!
Forum: Recovery Board
4 years ago
JadeDuck
I used to get really bad headaches from staring at my screen so much, so I got some blue coated glasses. I never get headaches from screens anymore! I made my dad (an engineer) get some too--they changed my life!
Forum: Recovery Board
4 years ago
JadeDuck
This is something I never really questioned while I was Mormon, but now that I'm out, it doesn't make any sense. At what point did the priesthood supposedly leave the earth plunging us into apostasy? By the time the original apostles died? Mormons don't seem to recognize any other early church leaders, so that's the only thing I can guess. If the priesthood left so quickly, what was even the
Forum: Recovery Board
4 years ago
JadeDuck
Thank you all for your suggestions! To clarify, I am trying, on my own, to establish what it is that I actually believe in before I commit to a church (Orthodoxy happened to be the closest on the basic things I compared when I first left Mormonism, hence why I'm studying it at the moment). I also thank you for your kindness towards me still wanting to be involved with religion. I know it isn't fo
Forum: Recovery Board
4 years ago
JadeDuck
Me! I was/am parentified. I didn't know this word; thanks for introducing it! There are 15 kids split between two homes in my family, but I mostly felt it at my Mormon home (which has 11 kids; I'm the second oldest). My older brother could never handle it, and neither could my not-much-younger sister, so it always fell to me. I really didn't notice until I was 12 and put in charge of my w
Forum: Recovery Board
4 years ago
JadeDuck
Please don't tell me religion is a scam or anything like that! I respect that position but religion is important to my life. Thanks!
Forum: Recovery Board
4 years ago
JadeDuck
Although I've left the Mormon church, I do still believe in God, and I'm actively trying to find a church that more accurately reflects my beliefs and values. Currently I'm investigating the Eastern Orthodox church. Does/did anyone else get a sort of PTSD when they went into other churches? I haven't been to a Mormon church since March, but I still feel unsettled in religious settings. In Mor
Forum: Recovery Board
4 years ago
JadeDuck
Condemning yourself and future generations sure sounds like Original/Ancestral Sin...
Forum: Recovery Board
4 years ago
JadeDuck
It always bothered me that we were told not to look into "anti-Mormon" stuff. Sure, it has a bias, but didn't the church trust its members to be able to look through that? Even more importantly, shouldn't members be able to refute any anti-Mormon preachings with doctrine? If anything, I always thought looking at anti-Mormon stuff should deepen your faith, since it raises questions and m
Forum: Recovery Board
4 years ago
JadeDuck
By tribal Mormon, do you mean cultural Mormon? I've had a really hard time letting go of Mormon culture because as miserable as it made me, it's so familiar. It's what I grew up with.
Forum: Recovery Board
4 years ago
JadeDuck
It was really difficult for her to watch everything, especially because it made her feel like I loved my dad more than her. She did the best she could, snapped a few times, but I realize she could've been a lot harsher. I did leave on a gut feeling. I didn't admit that I didn't believe until I had some bit of doctrinal evidence, but I realize now that it was completely on gut feeling. I felt
Forum: Recovery Board
4 years ago
JadeDuck
My fiance is not and never has been Mormon and is baffled by Mormon's treatment of tithing. It never occurred to me in other religions that tithing was just something you should do, not something required of you to get into Heaven (or the temple). Once he pointed out that that isn't standard for Christian sects, I realized that it made me uncomfortable.
Forum: Recovery Board
4 years ago
JadeDuck
I wore a temple dress for my baptism (one of my stepmom's). I can't get over the square necklines. Why choose a square neckline? They're hideous! Just make it come all the way to the throat! When my grandmother died, she was buried in her temple clothes. My dad made a point to bring me to see the body (I didn't really want to) to show me the clothes. I thought it was really strange. I'm glad I
Forum: Recovery Board
4 years ago
JadeDuck
All of these experiences are awful! I'm so sorry! I can't believe that temple workers would be so unaccommodating! I only ever went with people I knew and trusted, and these temple worker horror stories are making me grateful for it!
Forum: Recovery Board
4 years ago
JadeDuck
PS: I never understood how God, who loves us all unconditionally, would separate us from our families in the afterlife. It seems cruel. The idea of eternal families is something I still hold very close to my heart, but it's a different take on it.
Forum: Recovery Board
4 years ago
JadeDuck
I am so grateful that I never went through the endowment. I think it would've just completely broken me. Thank you for sharing about yourself and your daughter. Knowing that the promise of eternal families captured other people's attention really helps me feel validated. Sometimes I think that I should've seen the signs, but the promise of an eternal family seemed so worth it. I'm sad to know
Forum: Recovery Board
4 years ago
JadeDuck
My mother warned me about the temple rites (as they were in the late '90s), but I chose not to listen for some reason. My dad would mention that it was silly how secretive they were kept, but he never did tell me about them (although he would share other things he wasn't supposed to; patriarchal blessings and church manuals and such). I had forgotten about the two temple dedications I went to
Forum: Recovery Board
4 years ago
JadeDuck
I'm pretty sure that in a lot of countries it wasn't legal to have a civil ceremony in the temple (don't know why; probably because of the secrecy of the thing), so this rule never applied to them. I think it just got changed for the countries where it would be legal to have a temple-only ceremony.
Forum: Recovery Board
Pages: 12Next