And STAY married, for years.

I have a relative who's been married for decades, have kids and grandkids, and still together. Problem is, their first child was born long before they got married. That child is herself a married mother today. Everything's happy involving them. They're all simple, small-town Protestant types.

Is it all right to reveal this to missionaries or LDS diehards? Especially when it clearly contrasts with a passage out of the Missionary Student Manual?

Or should I keep it a secret, and play "their" game?

Why would you need to tell anybody about that anyway? The subject of your relatives having a child before they got married is unlikely to come up in daily conversation anyway, so you'll probably never need to mention it to anyone.

But to answer to the question, obviously most mormons are against having sex outside of marriage, but this is far from the worst family situation from a mormon perspective. It probably wouldn't cause too much drama.

Almost everybody has sex outside of marriage, and it's portrayed as normal in the media, etc. so most mormons can't afford to be troubled by it. I don't think most would care that much. At least they're married now.

OTOH, if they are investigating TSCC, let the mishies know so maybe the relative will not join. Otherwise, keep your mouth shut. Also, any sin is forgiven over that time, period. I remember noting in a town report in Plymouth, MA years ago that over 40% of marriages there resulted in a child well short of nine months later. C'est la vie.

Your relative should, at least mentally, backdate the marriage to nine months before the first birth.

This has absolutely nothing to do with you, so... WTF? Why even ask the question?

Clugie LOL!

BUT, their situation is none of your biswax. Butt out!

It is none of your business.

A lot of people marry when they have a bun in the oven. No big deal.
I guess Mormon couples do it too.

The case you cite is ancient history. And it's none of your business anyway.

So, do you have a problem with their marriage? That's the only reason I can think of for you sticking your nose in their business.

It's not your place to start spreading rumors about them, no matter how true they are... I'm sure you have a few skeletons in your closet that you would prefer weren't shared behind your back.

+1

For me, these situations are simple. If it's not mine to tell, I keep it to myself. Once you say it, you can't un-say it. It's out there to be passed around.

I'm glad you asked because getting others' points-of-view can expand our awareness and empathy. There's value in that for (most) all of us.

I don't see as how this is really any of your business and certainly not your business to make sure everyone they associate with are also aware. If this couple wish to share, it's entirely up to them. Talk about Mormon Big Brother. What would be the point in tattling to 19-year-old missionaries or TBMs?

1. Why is it a "problem"?

2. Have you ever heard of common-law marriage?

3. No, it would not be alright to reveal someone else's personal, private situation. It is not your business. Nor is it your place to judge.
4. This is really, really old news. The OOW child is now a married mother herself. Who really still cares at this point? Why do you?
5. What purpose would it serve to reveal this information? What's your motive?

People get waaaaayyy too hung up about the stupid piece of paper.

Gut instinct is why the heck would you tell the Mormons? Why wouldn't your respect family information. What is the context here? Are they "investigators"? If so, might be better effort to try to warn them to RUN AWAY!!

You sound like a judgemental douchebag. Perhaps you are still mormon?

Mind your own business.

+1

So, the gist of it is that loose lips sink ships.

Okay, it's difficult to decipher how much hypocrisy there is in this "church", and how members handle it. Have no reason to doubt you. IOW, they're no different from fundamentalist, evangelical types.

Most of them smoke, and that's one issue I've long had with them. I'd play a prank like this on them, but on second thought, I'll leave them alone. But they're my only "family" I really know.

You are very judgmental. Why don't you focus on yourself and leave everyone else and their choices alone?

This poster is Joining the lds church. I wouldn't take anything they say seriously.

When an unmarried girl/woman get's pregnant, the church would rather she put it up for adoption through LDSSS so some ultra-worthy infertile couple can have it. The girl/woman gets to disappear while gestating, do the repentance thing, then everyone gets to act like nothing happened.

The people playing games are the missionaries and LDS diehards, not the happy loving family who don't live in a cult. You're judging the wrong people in this scenario.

God no. Don't be a snitch.

The LDS cult knows that the statistics are better for a baby to stay LDS, if it is adopted by a married LDS couple. A couple who have a child out of wedlock, or conceived pre-wedlock are less likely to stay LDS; therefore the baby won't stay LDS.

The LDS cult's Number One source of new members is--infants!