Date: September 12, 2019 06:14AM
I agree with you, GPNE, that it is an extension of temple behavior--and that behavior is very creepy! They whisper, which gets them too close into your face, so you can smell and feel their breath. They love to shuffle around in their bedroom slippers and loose robes, which are too much like bed clothes. They touch, push, pull, assist, take off their clothes and put them on again, get naked and anoint, hug strangers and feel their 6-7 points through the veil, talk about the naked Eve in the movie. Add a dose of boredom, and the mind wanders out of control. My brothers-in-law would get very turned on, after being in the temple, and it made me barf to hear about it.
The California Mormons stuck to the American and European business-social protocol, which was to not shake a woman's hand unless SHE offered hers, first. The bishop or other priesthood leaders did not follow this, and were always grabbing little girl's hands, and making them feel awkward. To the boys, the men would squeeze too hard, and cause the boy to writhe in pain and bend towards the ground in submission, and then they would laugh about it. Domination!
In our Utah ward, I was constantly being patted on the shoulder, rubbed across my back, having my knee grabbed while sitting--even in sacrament meeting--by married men. The women never touched me, so that had to be partly sexual, right? Sometimes the shoulder and back rubs were garment feel-ups. Several times, another man would ask the one feeling me up, "Elder, what are you doing? Har-har." I was a professional woman, and I hated the implied domination, condescension, and inappropriate intimacy. These were not relatives or friends. We had no relationship. (Several actually tried to hit on me, verbally, in a very obvious, bumbling manner.) I never felt these people were spiritual or religious.
I was new to Utah, and didn't understand Utah Mormons, and felt it was best to not get too deep into their motives. I was also single, and felt uncomfortable with the wives' reaction to me.
So, I simply would push their hand away, step backwards and say, with a polite half-smile, "Hand's off." I had to set that boundary, every time, with everyone, and most of the rudeness stopped.