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Posted by: Amyjo ( )
Date: July 30, 2018 04:40PM

And now it's featured prominently on my front door.

It's too darn bad I had to order it in order to keep the pesky Jehovah Witnesses at bay. I just hope to God it works.

They're so annoying. Jesus may love em. I think they're bleeping irritating. When a person says "No, I'm not interested. Go away." That should be enough.

It's like they're socially challenged. I had to spend money to post an annoying sign on my front door, in order to keep more annoying strangers away from it. If it doesn't work, what to do next?

I want absolutely no contact with Jehovah Witnesses or their local church.

On a brighter note, a beautiful yard flag arrived at the same time today. So I have a beautiful picture of pink flamingos decorating my lawn. It almost makes up for the other awkward sign on the door. The flamingos look almost lifelike. Like a photograph was silkscreened onto the canvas.

If God is a Jehovah Witness *or* a Mormon, there would be no need for proselytizing period. If it's an either or, all or nothing kind of after life, there wouldn't be any need for missionaries here or proselytizing. Nor any need of 'baptism for the dead.' Mwahahaha.

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Posted by: caffiend ( )
Date: July 30, 2018 05:34PM

"Hello, Ms AmyJo, I'd like to tell you about a wonderful Perfect and August Preeminent Lord Of True Enlightenment Sun King Guru who has lead me to the ways of inner peace and outward prosperity. If I could just have an hour of your time to tell you how this Ascendant Master changed my life, and can change yours as well and usher in the Sacred Utopian Millenium--"

"Ms AmyJo--please, turn off that garden hose--I have to pay for these pamphlets myself--oh, damn you, you impertinent carnal hussey, you've ruined all of it!"

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Posted by: Amyjo ( )
Date: July 30, 2018 06:10PM

The ole garden hose revival eh?!

:D

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Posted by: ificouldhietokolob ( )
Date: July 30, 2018 06:38PM

Since JWs frown on higher education (can't have the minions thinking, you know!)...I hope they can read your sign :)

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Posted by: Amyjo ( )
Date: July 30, 2018 06:45PM

It's placed at eye level. Assuming they can read ...

If not a Rottweiler strategically placed as a sentry could be next.

I'm really that tired of them coming to my door.

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Posted by: Nightingale ( )
Date: July 30, 2018 08:32PM

Amyjo Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Assuming they can read ...

Likely not. They only attend to Grade 12 <sarc>

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Posted by: Amyjo ( )
Date: July 30, 2018 09:19PM

Is it true JW frown on higher education?

I hadn't heard that before Hie mentioned it here.

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Posted by: ificouldhietokolob ( )
Date: July 30, 2018 09:21PM

Straight from the horse's mouth:*

https://www.jwfacts.com/watchtower/higher-education-university.php

* with the horse being an ex-JW group, kinda like us...



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 07/30/2018 09:23PM by ificouldhietokolob.

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Posted by: Nightingale ( )
Date: July 30, 2018 10:08PM

Sorry to be snarky. It's hot here and I'm crabby as hell. (Over 90 - for us a world record-shattering event. I melt at 78).

Re JWs and higher education. Yeah, I wanted to be a nurse. Not encouraged (understatement). "Armageddon is coming and we won't need nurses in Paradise". All righty then.

I was boarding with a JW lady and after a couple of months started going with her to the Kingdom Hall. Of course she was delighted. My attendance meant something different to her than it did to me. I was interested in religion and so went with her just to see what it was about.

During my last year at high school I had been accepted into nursing, due to start the first September after grad. Just a few weeks before classes commenced they postponed my entrance due to a very minor abnormality on my lab work (we had to take a complete physical and pass prior to entry). I would have moved out of the JW woman's home and into residence, unlikely to be influenced further by the spiel. Of course, the JWs thought it was Jehovah God intervening so I would stick around and convert. Drat that Jehovah - that's what happened.

I didn't know any JW of my age who went on to continue their education after high school. It was your instant ticket to being considered less faithful (oh the horror). Also, it was seen as a total waste of time, money and effort because you wouldn't need any of it in the New World (post-Armageddon, which was imminent - eternally so). Because of course in Paradise everything is green, lush and well, perfect. It was hard to visualize what exactly we would spend all our time doing there. But, as with the Mormons, obedience is second only to God.

Fortunately, events came to pass, my brain grew up, experiences were instructive and I eventually left the WT Society (JWs) and then made a beeline straight back to nursing school. It worked out OK for me as the extra maturity gained in the few years' delay helped me enormously (thanks Jehovah!).

Many of the men I knew at that time became realtors as they could largely work for themselves and call their own hours. They weren't wanting for much either in that business. Their good incomes meant many of the wives didn't have to worry about working. So who would miss higher ed?

I was the odd one out, not wanting to be married right away, without career or education or job other than in a household.

If you want to be cynical (OK, so let's) - it can't hurt to keep your young folks close to home, not out in the wide world meeting non-members and learning stuff.



Edited 2 time(s). Last edit at 07/30/2018 10:13PM by Nightingale.

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Posted by: bona dea ( )
Date: July 31, 2018 12:51AM

You may need a sign defining proselytizing. That is a very big word.

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Posted by: ificouldhietokolob ( )
Date: July 31, 2018 09:07AM

:)

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Posted by: NeverMo in CA ( )
Date: July 31, 2018 11:45AM

bona dea Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> You may need a sign defining proselytizing. That
> is a very big word.

In all seriousness, yes. I say this as a college English teacher. I would not be at all surprised if some missionaries don't know what "proselytizing" means. If I had that problem in my neighborhood, I'd probably make a sign saying, "Please do not try to talk to us about your religion. We are not interested." I hope it does work for you, though!

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Posted by: Nightingale ( )
Date: July 31, 2018 12:02PM

I like the specific statement re no religion. No interpretation needed.

I know that JWs know what 'proselytizing' means. First of all, you can learn a lot in 12 years of school. Plus they do read. Plus every member, even kids, regularly gives public talks (to each other but from the stage) which they write themselves (not recycled pablum). So. They read. They write. They speak. They interact. Despite appearances to outsiders, many can be bright and accomplished. They just happen to be part of a cloistered group with an end times outlook, not much chance of outside influence or broader horizons. I know by definition this makes them seem anti-intellectual. But it's not the way some outsiders portray it.

The reason they will recognize what AmyJo's sign says is that they are actively, repeatedly taught that WE DO NOT PROSELYTIZE. Either by intent, purpose, definition or practice. As I've said, they are looking for lost sheep, a very defined doctrine of theirs. They long ago decided to abandon the art of persuasion and just identify those who are actually already interested in at least hearing what they have to say. Maybe they used to as a group argue, debate, persuade at the doors. Then they switched gears.

I usually just say "no thank you" and they leave immediately with a pleasant smile and a "good day". I don't use the trite (to them) phrases such as "not interested" (they think: you would be if you knew what we have to say) or "I have my own religion" (they think yeah but you could always change to the "true" one). Etc. Only once did I change it up and say to two men who thought I was interested (I was slow to indicate otherwise) that "I'm disfellowshipped" (exxed to them) so I could withdraw the false impression of interest and not engage them in further discussion (they're not supposed to talk to ex-members). They've never come back. I do get the pamphlets through the door re their few special observances (at Easter time, etc).

So yeah they will understand the sign. No it is not a guarantee they won't ring the bell anyway. They just do not acknowledge that such a sign is directed at them.

My disclaimer would be that we're in different countries, neighbourhoods. Maybe they have different approaches down there. More in your face perhaps. Not the same emphasis. As with most things, location plays into everything.

Viewpoint. Perspective. Beliefs. Crazy things eh? We can see the same thing, hear identical words, yet come away with diametrically opposite impressions of what just happened. Challenging.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 07/31/2018 12:06PM by Nightingale.

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Posted by: Visitors Welcome ( )
Date: July 31, 2018 05:53PM

bona dea Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> You may need a sign defining proselytizing. That
> is a very big word.

"Please don't mention your faith until the orgy is over and we're all too drunk to care"

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Posted by: rosysam ( )
Date: August 03, 2018 02:55PM

Hello AmyJo,

I hope it works for you. They just ignored my "No Soliciting or Proselytizing." I talked to the local police and they told me you have to list them individually on the door. Hells Bells! I could fill the whole door with Especially this or that.....JW's, Mormons, cleaning supply, solar companies. The officer clarified that the sign should say "No Soliciting or Proselytizing, especially Jehovah Witnesses." I haven't had a chance to add the especially.... yet.

It seems a bit silly I have to go that far. Maybe I will have some fun with it and add a sign stating, "If you are a Pastafarian from The Flying Spaghetti Church, by all means, knock on my door."

I was once a missionary a long long time ago in a land far far away. (LOL, Italy) I try to be nice to everybody at the door. However, they started coming really early Saturday and Sunday mornings. My spouse works nights and when I told them that, they started coming more often at those times. The last time they came by, I didn't get to the door in time and my spouse began yelling at them and told them he was going to stun them with our new 3 million volt stun gun he keeps by the door.
They left real quick. Maybe that will be the end of that. We shall see.

I still want to make the Pastafarian sign though. When I told my DH, he just rolled his eyes, shook his head and said, "It's a good thing I love you." I just smiled and said nothing.

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Posted by: Amyjo ( )
Date: August 03, 2018 03:22PM

OMG. How annoying is that?!

Stupid people anyway. If they dare leave more materials on my door, or knock again, well rather than shoot em. I may need to do the extra sign thing myself.

But it's outrageous they don't respect simple etiquette.

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Posted by: lisadee ( )
Date: August 20, 2018 10:16PM

rosysam Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> ..... Maybe
> I will have some fun with it and add a sign
> stating, "If you are a Pastafarian from The Flying
> Spaghetti Church, by all means, knock on my
> door."
>
> ...


This cracked me up!
Good one!

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Posted by: Amyjo ( )
Date: August 31, 2018 10:01AM

Rosysam and her husband have a terrific sense of humor. The 3,000,000 volt stun gun cracked me up too.

:D

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Posted by: catnip ( )
Date: July 30, 2018 07:39PM

Good luck! Please return and report.

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Posted by: Amyjo ( )
Date: August 30, 2018 11:48AM

So far it seems to be working. No knocks on my door. Not even so much as a Watch Tower flyer stuck in my mailbox.

:)

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Posted by: 3X ( )
Date: July 30, 2018 06:55PM

I'm mystified as to why you are the object of unrelenting JW attention, while my local JW congregation scrupulously avoid my domicile? Just lucky I guess ...


"If it doesn't work, what to do next?"


List the verboten sect _by_ _name_ on your front door (under "No Proselytizing")



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 07/30/2018 06:59PM by 3X.

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Posted by: Amyjo ( )
Date: July 31, 2018 11:50AM

They descend on our neighborhood routinely like a pack of wolves (in sheep's clothing of course, to try and fool us.)

If it's so close to the end of the world they could start kissing their own behinds goodbye, and leave the rest of us to fend for ourselves.

I'm more confident of being saved without em than with em!

Should I risk telling them they belong to a cult? Maybe that would shift the tide in my favor.

I'm hoping I won't need to if my sign does its job.

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Posted by: slskipper ( )
Date: July 30, 2018 07:21PM

I would welcome a proselytizing visit from some Free Love missionaries- especially if they gave out free samples...

Okay, I sincerely do not mean to make light of anybody's beliefs. But the wrong types always seem to get in first and dominate the field.

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Posted by: Cheryl ( )
Date: July 30, 2018 07:27PM

The last time they came to our door about ten years ago, DH let loose with such an out spoken demand that they leave and never return, that they left, trotting down the street and never did return.

A call to the Kingdom Hall to stay away is more than fair warning.

As I recall it went something like this, "Get off this property, you ugly, nasty, fanatical cultists!! DO NOT ever step foot here again or you'll wish you hadn't!"

He stomped out on the porch and stood an inch from their noses, with a sneer on his face and a snarl in his tone. Then, he followed them to their car as they spun the wheels and ground the gears trying to escape.

We don't allow fanatical religious trespassers to take charge when they intrude.

We've had a gut full of it. Everyone has a right to say who can wallow around on their private property. Strangers slinging religious trash included.

They don't merely skip our house. They don't come on the street at all.

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Posted by: Nightingale ( )
Date: July 30, 2018 07:37PM

Will not work. As I said.

I'd go with The Jerry Response. If you must.

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Posted by: Amyjo ( )
Date: July 31, 2018 11:54AM

This is the pretty yard art that came from China yesterday via Amazon.

Love them pink flamingos. They look so real like they could dance right off of there. :)

https://scontent-lga3-1.xx.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/38130086_10216844968453736_4192303571737247744_n.jpg?_nc_cat=0&oh=d077a9d7b88c11fe643307febd455042&oe=5BD6AA1C



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 07/31/2018 11:54AM by Amyjo.

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Posted by: Amyjo ( )
Date: July 31, 2018 11:57AM

Now if JW would turn up on my doorstep as pink flamingos, I might not turn them away!

;-)

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Posted by: Nightingale ( )
Date: July 31, 2018 12:08PM

Yes, they're pretty. But hey. China? What happened to Made in the USA? :)



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 07/31/2018 12:08PM by Nightingale.

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Posted by: Amyjo ( )
Date: July 31, 2018 12:13PM

Right? Besides China practically owning our national debt, most of the consumer goods we purchase are made in China.

The global economy is truly global. And interdependent.

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Posted by: tumwater ( )
Date: July 31, 2018 12:16PM

Since both, LDS and JW's are homophobic, has anyone thought about displaying a LGBT banner in their yard to ward off the missionaries?

https://www.amazon.com/s/ref=nb_sb_noss_1?url=search-alias%3Daps&field-keywords=lgbt+banner

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Posted by: Amyjo ( )
Date: July 31, 2018 12:24PM

No, but some neighbors display rainbow flags in their yards with children on them, or a dove, to symbolize the same thing.

That's a neat idea too!

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Posted by: helenm ( )
Date: August 02, 2018 01:50PM

My university friend converted to the church a little over a year ago. She was telling me how she realized that the number of well-dressed people who used to knocked on her door were actually Mormons missionaries. She never answered the door then. It wasn't until she was standing outside a bus stop and ran into a pair that she talked to them.

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Posted by: Amyjo ( )
Date: August 02, 2018 02:22PM

Shocking isn't it?

She was spared all those years until that fateful day at a bus stop.

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Posted by: Pooped ( )
Date: August 03, 2018 03:29PM

Regarding the topic of not being able to read your sign, I'm wondering if there might be one of those signs with the picture of something and then the marked out red circle that tells you it is not allowed. A pictograph of a personage wearing a tie and long pants carrying a book and then the "not allowed" red symbol over it comes to mind. I think I'll Google it. It might be generic enough to cover both Mormons and JW's. No words necessary.

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Posted by: Pooped ( )
Date: August 03, 2018 03:31PM


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Posted by: Amyjo ( )
Date: August 03, 2018 03:36PM

LOL. If I add that to my door it will start to look like one of those cars on the road plastered with bumper stickers.

It really detracts from my curb appeal. JW are so annoying though, I'm willing to do that to keep them away.

They'd probably make up some other excuse like they don't believe in crosses or something else.

In other words, they are harassing people; not simply proselytizing. :(

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Posted by: Amyjo ( )
Date: August 12, 2018 08:51PM

The shipping envelope for the "no proselytizing" sign?

Was sent from where else, but Saint George, Utah?!

Talk about fortuity! :D

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Posted by: lisadee ( )
Date: August 29, 2018 11:51PM

I wish I'd had such a sign in college when the JWs came calling on Saturday morning. I lived off campus and worked late nights. Early Saturdays were not my thing. College students like to/need to sleep in. Heck, I avoided 8 o'clock classes if I could.

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Posted by: Amyjo ( )
Date: August 30, 2018 11:50AM

That would drive me bonkers! It's very discourteous of them, to say the least.

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Posted by: emanon ( )
Date: August 30, 2018 11:20PM

Years ago I put the following sign on my door:
"You are trespassing if you are here for any religious purpose or on behalf of any religion. We will prosecute to the full extent of the law." Utah law code listed

The JW's and Mormons kept coming to the door. Both were kindly told no, and to stop. They kept coming. JW's moreso than the Mo's.

It took several more steps before they both stopped. What really worked was putting signs on EVERY single door in the neighborhood. I listed our address and that they were trespassing if they came to our home for religious purposes and that we'd prosecute. I also put signs on the church doors. They took them down and I put more up so there were there for Sunday morning. I did the same at the Stake Center. Oh, and I posted the same note on the Stake President's door.

For the JW's I posted a couple of notes on the door of their Kingdom Hall. These notes said, "Stay the f*** away from my house." Then I went to the police station to report them.

Neither group has been to my door since. It's been heavenly. :)

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Posted by: Amyjo ( )
Date: August 31, 2018 06:14AM

It was harassment that they kept coming to your door despite your sign.

JW in Utah sound more aggressive than the Mormons. Pesky buggars.

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Posted by: Cheryl ( )
Date: August 31, 2018 10:00AM

They don't like people leaving their homes and glaring into their faces inches from their noses. They don't like having anyone go into the street to write down their license number and put rude notes through the windows or under the wipers. If they don't like what happens at a house, they'll avoid it. If they are treated with a smile and vague hint or door sign, they'll return.

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Posted by: Amyjo ( )
Date: August 31, 2018 10:24AM

The only "run-in" that I encountered with a JW while visiting Utah was in a Saint George parking lot, at a gas station. He walked up to me while I was fueling up my car to start a conversation. It was not religious whatsoever, but he did mention he is a JW who retired to St. George.

It was a friendly exchange, but still a little off putting IMO. It was broad daylight and in a public space or I'd have as likely not acknowledged him at all. He was probably used to talking to strangers as a JW. I'm not.

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