*That* fucked-up 'teaching' is such a fucking mind-fuck, largely responsible for self-hate and more self-mind-fuckery. Sorry...that belief is such a hot button for me. As a teen, I belived it. As a parent, I simply cannot understand it.
Forum: Recovery Board

n/t
Forum: Recovery Board

n/t
Forum: Recovery Board

n/t
Forum: Recovery Board

n/t
Forum: Recovery Board

I'ma take mah chalk over there & write a certain web-address on the cement!
Forum: Recovery Board

Some things were so much easier, and now I have to keep 're-training' my brain and behaviors with new patterns. Otoh, I now have the freedom to CREATE my life in ways that are positive, not live to someone *else's* idea of How brownie Should Be. YIPPEEEE!
Forum: Recovery Board

n/t
Forum: Recovery Board

But seriously...my Intuition is spot-on...when I can hear it through all the static from tscc, parental (& other adult) 'authority' figures which OVERRODE my precious inner resource...that's a hard one to forgive & shift, but at least I no longer wonder if good ole HG is putting *his* 2 cents in!
Forum: Recovery Board

Oh! I almost forgot...writing-IN INK exmormon.org inside all the BOM's int he thrift stores, lol! Bad brownie *snicker*
Forum: Recovery Board

n/t
Forum: Recovery Board

Re-baptized my 8yo 'in the name of the faaarter, and the buuuuttt, and the hoooolly unnderpantsss.'
Forum: Recovery Board

My own parallel experience came in the form of tbm-x dragging me through court, perpetuating lies designed to cripple me financially & otherwise... ...meanwhile my lesbian (!) neighbors brought groceries to me to help my family make it through that rough time. ...and tbm's new molly got Tiffany jewelry that christmas.
Forum: Recovery Board

n/t
Forum: Recovery Board

n/t
Forum: Recovery Board

n/t
Forum: Recovery Board

Yup...after 'knowing' my life's purpose- as defined by tscc-and having to sift through what's important to *me,* I am struggling with living a life I am truly invested in. It's more like Life By Default, especially having lost so much due to my apostacy/awakening. I am working hard on it, though & appreciate this board as a valuable resource. Thank you all.
Forum: Recovery Board

To me, the fact that there is any 'debate' speaks volumes.
Forum: Recovery Board

...by the mormon kids b/c I wasn't one--one little snot even sneered at me 'You can't sing that song!' when she heard me singing a primary tune. Then we moved to 'tha mission field,' joined the cult, and I was shunned & ostracized for being a mo in the bible belt. That's *hell* for a sensitive teen. I still struggle with social situations & interactions.
Forum: Recovery Board

n/t
Forum: Recovery Board

Wasting 28 years wondering what was so wrong with me that I could not just Be Happy.
Forum: Recovery Board

SusieQ#1-I have always appreciated your clarity, positivity, and real-ness. I am inspired yet again. <3
Forum: Recovery Board

When I was going through divorce, I attempted to convey to my attorney the reasons for my disabling FEAR--(three, one each across the throat, chest, and belly)...but he just got 'deer in the headlights' look & asked me if I had told anyone else about this... I still don't understand his reaction...I mean, what was behind his reaction...but if I were to guess, it was his thinking of all the
Forum: Recovery Board

n/t
Forum: Recovery Board

n/t
Forum: Recovery Board

Hi- I haven't posted too much here (yet)...rfm was the lifeline for me circa 2005, Thank You. One thing I still *really* struggle with is social interactions...as a mormon for 28 years I was so insulated from Real Life that I feel at times as if I'm walking around naked ...or maybe in only garmies, lol...& no one tells me-- Also, I have been realizing the impact of my being a Highly Sensit
Forum: Recovery Board

I am wondering if Jodi had awareness of temple penalties...
Forum: Recovery Board

The funny thing is...the *other* things that occur in the temples (and used to go on, such as blood oaths) are just as wacky & unbelievable!
Forum: Recovery Board

I'm so sorry--I *really* hear you on this issue...ugh. (((hug)))
Forum: Recovery Board

Cleaned the University stadium after football games every Saturday night of the freezing winter as a teen. Each family had a section & would work our way down scraping garbage from under the bleachers...the peanut shells were the worst. They stuck like velcro to the rough cement. Ahhhh, the memories of that smell...
Forum: Recovery Board