"May the bridges we burn light the way"
Forum: Recovery Board

I got your back EB! I'm sure everyone here can agree. I hope you made it through all the visitations and rituals mostly unscathed; I know how terrifying, crazed, and surreal it can all be. My thoughts are with you.
Forum: Recovery Board

As you may recall, my long estranged brother and semi-estranged mother both passed away a little over a year ago. Then my father remarried some black widow he met at the temple less than 4 months later and told his kids to suck it (even the TBM one) because he was going to be 'fully immersed in a Christ-filled life'. I admit that the pain and lonely stress of it all still lingers. It lingers
Forum: Recovery Board

We have a winner!
Forum: Recovery Board

Thank you for your kind and wise words, RMM. You are completely correct, the word horrific does comes to mind when thinking about all of these grievances. Yes, he did not have the decency to use my name, and I decided that I could officially call him a narcissist after this response. My sister said she had felt that this was indeed his problem for the last 10 years. It totally makes sense looki
Forum: Recovery Board

OH, how I needed that laugh, laperla. Grandma was full of great one liners. Her other death bed zinger was "Yeah. I'll quit smoking....when there's six feet of earth on top of me and I can't lift my cigarette to my lips."
Forum: Recovery Board

Nice list! I'd throw Caligula (x rated cut) in there, and Jodorowsky's The Holy Mountain. Also: In the Realm of the Senses. A Snake of June. Tetsuo's Iron Man. Ichi the Killer.... I could go on and on.
Forum: Recovery Board

Basically anything with swearing? My mom used to say she'd rather "see disgusting naked bodies than hear swearing" in films. Has anyone here seen "Missionary" ? Its a horror/thriller about a mormon missionary who turns into a scary stalker, lots of violent sex, baseball bats, the works? I can only imagine some church members thinking, oh this looks great, and tunin
Forum: Recovery Board

No, more about how he hurt us by not telling us and going the extra length to deceive us during a time of great mourning. I def won't worry about the BFF part.....
Forum: Recovery Board

DRAMA Update for anyone who's interested in train wrecks: My father finally reached out to me by email last week, it was a form of what I have come to call a "christian apology". "I'm sorry none of you are taking my calls. I'm sorry that your sister called you and told you I was married" etc, without acknowledging any real issues or apologizing for his own behavior.
Forum: Recovery Board

All I can say in response is WTF?!..... This is the reason I left the church in the first place.
Forum: Recovery Board

Ashwaganda is a somnifera, so it is within the nightshade family, and I also consider it to be interchangeable with papaver somniferum (which is poppy in it's natural state) I use it for anxiety, heartbreak, headaches, and insomnia. I like to drink a tea with ashwaganda in it at night before bed, and I sometimes use a tincture of it directly during the day to help with tension and stress. Als
Forum: Recovery Board

My GGG uncle on my mother's side was David W. Patten. You know, the OG apostle/martyr that spoke with Bigfoo- I mean Cain? My father always bragged about marrying into that connection while I was growing up. Talk about grasping for straws of superiority....
Forum: Recovery Board

I read your post, and I feel you too. I wish I could tell you that it gets easier, but it doesn't. The way you can adapt and choose to accept yourself will though, with much searching and self-care. I found that it comes in waves. Exile, forced conversations, semi-acceptance, complacency, negotiating, exile, and again and again et cetera et cetera, until you either break completely free, or s
Forum: Recovery Board

I have no idea about the frat thing. The "true version" of the story of my father's conversion I have only heard from his nevermo siblings. My mother "stole him from the family and brainwashed him." My father's telling of it (de)evolves and gets more pious and goes back further as he gets older. He has some delusions now that his GG grandparents and there after were actu
Forum: Recovery Board

Ha! My dad grew up in Las Vegas, his family was in the area for several generations- straight gunslinger stock. I have some infamous ancestors. I think he graduated from Western HS, but spent his freshman year at Rancho?? Then he went to The U where he met my mother and converted to the church. I grew up in Panaca NV, 2.5 hrs NE of LV. The man who gave me my PB was the stake pres there,
Forum: Recovery Board

Oh my, so this really is a thing? Finding single women at the temple? I think I was right to be truly horrified by that. My TBM sis thought it was outlandish because "you don't just have time to sit around and talk and play grab a** at the temple".
Forum: Recovery Board

To be fair, I was a definitely a daddy's girl growing up, until I left the church of course and then *gasp* went to evil art school. I was emancipated at 16, living with a catholic aunt and going to a very good magnet school in Sin City just to get out of the LDS village in NV where I was raised. This is when I started having problems with my late brother, whom was long out of the house and worki
Forum: Recovery Board

Dude. Step-mom?! I'm 36 and I shudder at the thought. My brother is 47 and my sister is 45. My mom was hard enough to deal with, she was mentally ill and we had a very tempestuous relationship. I'm also now what I call a "step-step" mom myself to two adults that decided they hated me well before they even met me. So I think I've tasted both sides of the coin. You are most definitely
Forum: Recovery Board

Hello to my secret friends here on the board. All of you. Bear with me, this may get long, but I need to get it out. I've been a long time lurker, I think almost 10 years now, but not much of a poster. I have come back here from time to time when I needed to see the words of others with similar backgrounds, when I needed to be consoled, or to know that I am not completely crazy; or worse, complet
Forum: Recovery Board

Well, that escalated quickly....
Forum: Recovery Board

I think the first part of your question is true, but most tbm's I know live in a constant state of butthurt and only know how to speak guilt trip.
Forum: Recovery Board

Bravo Cheryl, bravo! I just finished reading your book in one sitting. I feel both triggered and unfettered.... I loved it! My BIC mother was born and raised in Ogden during the same era, so I have heard many family stories pertaining to this time, but with a certain "polyg-fearing-though-maybe-the-practice-will-be-called-upon-us-again-any-minute" kind of flavor. The opening te
Forum: Recovery Board

You're not alone there, this block stinks like hot garbage and asphalt. Also, many varieties of trees here smell like rotting flesh when they bloom. That may have been what was waking you up. Perhaps we can have a DC exmo meetup? Tapas? Drinks? Tea?
Forum: Recovery Board

I'm in Mt. Pleasant, slowly rotating in my own juices, like rotisserie chicken..... Not sure about the saints, but perhaps they can be found.
Forum: Recovery Board

I grew up less than a 45 min drive to the location of the MMM. My convert father took us there on a regular basis and told us several versions of the story. In fact, I think we stopped there every time we were dragged to St. George for some temple function, where I would have to sit in the hot car. I wish I could remember his conflicting stories(they were pretty glossy), but I do remember runn
Forum: Recovery Board

Reading your post gave me deja vu! I was in a similar position with my partners 23yo step kid two years ago. So I am like the "step step" wicked witch of the west. She lived in our spare room, never interacted with anyone or contributed to the house, up only at night(on speed), had people in and out of the house while we were sleeping, including her psychotic addict mother, whom we
Forum: Recovery Board

I agree. DC has the worst drivers on the planet....
Forum: Recovery Board

Hey, I'm from Vegas too! Nice! I've been here for 3 years, but my boyfriend has lived here since he was 3. He's a great tour guide!
Forum: Recovery Board

Welcome to the belly of the beast! I call it Hollywood for Ugly People(ie political joke, sorry) I too left the desert for the swamp 3 years ago. I live in NW DC. Be prepared for the god forsaken humidity and the mosquitoes that come with, the east coast culture clash, the worst cab drivers and most unfriendly dog owners on the planet, oh, & Surrender Dorothy of course ;) Also Don't ke
Forum: Recovery Board