I sincerely apologize for potentially promoting loud laughter. I shall whip myself in shame. Fortunately for me I never got far enough to go to the temple except to be baptized in the name of dead people, most of whom were probably made up.
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To resign I would have to give a f*ck about the church. I don't.
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By the authority of the Prophet Tammy Monsoon (Is he still alive? I haven't been keeping up), I order all of you to give me 10% of your earnings! In all seriousness, is Boyd Sphincter Boy still alive? I haven't been on here for several months. Moved from Arizona to Florida to try to get as far away from the Satanic Moron Temples as I could (especially since they were building one in Tucson.) I've
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Qatar thought about it but then realized that those Mormons are just too crazy!
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Step by step, and eventually teenage boys in Utah will be whacking off to pictures of eyes.
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We had to say goodbye to our dog today. She suffered from lymphoma. She was actually diagnosed 6 months to the day we lost our other dog to lymphoma. She was a sweet, sweet dog. If any of you have a dog, make sure you hug them tight and enjoy their love and loyalty.
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For real. Go back to the kitchen! j/k
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It's time to come out of the closet. I, pigsinzen, am a troll. My real name is Boyd, but my friends call me Kenny. I invite all of you to come join me at church this coming up Sunday. There will be refreshments (wonderbread and water!), motivational speakers, and my favorite part of the day...Priesthood meeting! I just love telling all the virgin Deacons not to masturbate. I love it so much
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Asking for donations for Tommy's bond money, or however they do it in the UK?
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Ms. Stewart, I think FAMM is a noble cause.
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Ya'll remember those little characters in the '90s who had crazy hair? Kind of like these dudes with the pink hair...http://www.thedrum.com/news/2013/01/31/one-90s-kids-internet-explorers-nostalgia-trip-tops-viral-video-chart
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What does the City of London want?
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So do I!
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Me thinks Jesus would want them to dedicate their lives to service, not just a day.
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A church leader facing fraud charges in the UK?
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How much do you wanna bet that if this story is true, that it came from someone who thinks positively of the Cult?
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It depends on what you call magical. "Hey Sisters, care to see something magical in my sacred underpants?"
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That would be fun.
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You could release yourself today if you wanted to.
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OP said it was a joke. But you better believe when tithing money starts to dry up it will happen. They'll even rent out the temples if it brings in money. When money is God nothing is sacred.
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Maybe if they did that every week.
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Whether or not there are enough members around does not matter. Temples are for laundering money, not serving people.
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If you know your membership number include that as well.
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Life isn't like the movies where the love of your life comes to you so easily. Not being with someone doesn't reflect negatively on you either. Be comfortable and confident in who you are and the rest will fall into place.
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Rest assured he was buried in his special G's. His last words were reportedly "Thank God I can finally get away from all those annoying Mormons."
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http://www.theonion.com/articles/humanity-forced-to-put-down-aging-god,35230/ This is from a pretty reliable source.
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I totally disagree. j/k
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They should have Gilbert Gottfried do the voice of Jehovah.
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Gosh darn it, golly gee wally, milk and cookies sure are swell. I'm no troll but my neighbor's are Mormon and they sure is nice and invite me over to read stories on Mondays. I sure think it's not nice what them Englander's are doing to that nice old man who my neighbor says is the revelator. I don't even know what a seer and revelator is. Is that someone that sees? Gosh, I think that means
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It is times like these when those unexpected heart attacks happen at the most convenient of moments.
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